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Okay, so I realize this is probably going to be a slightly controversial thread but wanted to hear people's opinions on it...
I'm in the process of relocating to NB from NYC. I've lived in different parts of the country on the east coast and had also previously lived in San Diego for a couple of years.
I constantly see people saying that so many in Newport Beach or Laguna Beach (or other parts of OC) are superficial, shallow, etc.
Do you think many say this out of JEALOUSY? I mean, sure, rich people buy rich things - huge houses, expensive cars, expensive clothes, surgery to try and make themselves look and feel better, etc.
I guess I am of the mindset that if someone works really hard and builds wealth that a big benefit of that hard work is getting to enjoy the finer things in life. I personally don't see that as superficial, as if those wealthy people don't care about anything else. I'm sure many give to charity and do other things with their time and money to make their communities and the world a better place. I'm sure there are certainly a share of jerks and idiots in Orange County but that's the case anywhere regardless of how much money they have.
Of all the times I've visited NB and LB, I've met nothing but really nice people. And, hey, why wouldn't they be nice... they live in PARADISE!
So are the rich areas of OC really made up of mostly "superficial" bad people, or is this a stereotype created by others with less money that are jealous of those with so much money they can afford to buy anything they want?
I played in a Boston punk band back in my teens, and everyone in that scene would constantly deride and rail on people who wore polo shirts and khakis, about how superficial they were, about how they thought that they were better than everyone else 'cause they dressed so nice... blithely unaware that they were being every bit as superficial and exclusive because they deemed their preference for tattered, adorned clothing to be superior.
Basically, what I'm getting at, is that you will find superficiality absolutely anywhere and everywhere if you're looking for it. The image I formed in my head of Orange County, from having spent time there, is that it's a mostly middle-class area with pretty normal people who err on the side of friendly, especially compared to NY or MA. You can certainly find superficial people in any part of Orange County or LA county, but how is that any different from NYC or Boston? Seattle is probably the most superficial place I've ever lived, but everyone thinks it's this come-one, come-all utopia.
I think it depends on what you are looking for and where you are moving from. Moving from NYC, you will probably be fine. A lot of New Yorkers move here and like it. The OC scene is not for some of us though. I could tell you countless stories, and they definitely feel superior. I worked there and experienced some pretty awful situations based on their behavior. Southern OC is worse than Northern. Honestly, some of the meanest and rudest people I have met. Those were my experiences, and I know others who feel the same. I came from parts of the country where that behavior is not okay. It is "normal" in the OC though, and the people there really do not think they are wrong to yell and scream at people trying to provide service for them. They do not care if you are helping someone else, they demand your attention NOW. But 45-55 miles north, and it can be completely different. The Inland Empire has more down to earth people.
I moved to OC (Laguna Niguel) from SE PA two years ago...from all I read on the internet, I was positively frightened of the type of (OC housewives) people that would live here.
That was all completely silly...I have to say that people in S. CA are some of the nicest people anywhere. Case in point...neighbors that bring you cookies when you move in...send Christmas candy over to your house at the holidays...offering to put carts back for a very pregnant me a year ago...everyone smiles at my kids and makes nice comments...I could go on and on. Back in PA where I lived for almost 40 years, I can say honestly that people keep to themselves and there is plenty of snobbery there if you look for it...we lived in Bucks County, which has come concentration of wealth.
I guess my point is that there is good and bad no matter where you live...but I feel fortunate to have experienced mostly only good in regards to people living in OC....must be the weather that makes everyone so happy
I played in a Boston punk band back in my teens, and everyone in that scene would constantly deride and rail on people who wore polo shirts and khakis, about how superficial they were, about how they thought that they were better than everyone else 'cause they dressed so nice... blithely unaware that they were being every bit as superficial and exclusive because they deemed their preference for tattered, adorned clothing to be superior.
Basically, what I'm getting at, is that you will find superficiality absolutely anywhere and everywhere if you're looking for it. The image I formed in my head of Orange County, from having spent time there, is that it's a mostly middle-class area with pretty normal people who err on the side of friendly, especially compared to NY or MA. You can certainly find superficial people in any part of Orange County or LA county, but how is that any different from NYC or Boston? Seattle is probably the most superficial place I've ever lived, but everyone thinks it's this come-one, come-all utopia.
This x1,000. So, so true.
I saw the world differently my first year of college. In college I had friends in many circles (just as I had in high school), but I was astonished that not a single one of my college eco friends (supposedly loving and accepting of all people) accepted my cheerleader roommate, or any of my roommates, for that matter, that weren't eco-nazis, and none of my roomies were (one was a cheerleader, two were preps, one was into skaters, etc, etc - yet all of us in my house loved each other equally).
My cheerleader roommate, whom I was closest with, did nothing wrong to my eco friends and was always sweet, trying to make friends with them, yet they pre-judged her time and time again (and often wouldn't even let her into parties) based on her clothes, hair, and car. Needless to say, I stopped hanging out with the eco-snobs since clearly they were only accepting of people like them, which is a sad way to live.
Snobbery is everywhere, and sometimes the people you expect it least from are the ones that dish it out the most.
Last edited by SunnyTXsmile; 09-03-2012 at 07:58 AM..
My cheerleader roommate, whom I was closest with, did nothing wrong to my eco friends and was always sweet, trying to make friends with them, yet they pre-judged her time and time again (and often wouldn't even let her into parties) based on her clothes, hair, and car. Needless to say, I stopped hanging out with the eco-snobs since clearly they were only accepting of people like them, which is a sad way to live..
I made a conscious effort at that age never to dis the Dana Hills or Cal cheerleaders.
I saw the world differently my first year of college. In college I had friends in many circles (just as I had in high school), but I was astonished that not a single one of my college eco friends (supposedly loving and accepting of all people) accepted my cheerleader roommate, or any of my roommates, for that matter, that weren't eco-nazis, and none of my roomies were (one was a cheerleader, two were preps, one was into skaters, etc, etc - yet all of us in my house loved each other equally).
My cheerleader roommate, whom I was closest with, did nothing wrong to my eco friends and was always sweet, trying to make friends with them, yet they pre-judged her time and time again (and often wouldn't even let her into parties) based on her clothes, hair, and car. Needless to say, I stopped hanging out with the eco-snobs since clearly they were only accepting of people like them, which is a sad way to live.
Snobbery is everywhere, and sometimes the people you expect it least from are the ones that dish it out the most.
Yeah, like I said: I found Seattle to be, on the whole, the most superficial place I've lived, and it's been backed up by some of the things that people say in the Seattle forum... there's a dress code there that will get you shunned, disregarded, and sneered at if you don't abide, it just centers around earth-toned sweaters and REI jackets instead of board shorts and polos with starched collars. Cliques are cliques, and no one necessarily has a monopoly on exclusive, douchey behavior over another.
I will say, though, that although again, I played in a punk band, grew up poor and in the 'hood and all that... I'm also blonde-haired, blue-eyed, 6'2, and built like a tank. Consequently, all through my youth and into my adult life, people have made assumptions about me: that I'm a snob, that I'm a meathead, etc. I went to art school, and every new semester, I'd have people assume that I was a big, dumb jock until they actually saw my art or listened to me talk. My friends would bring me to a party full of hipsters and I'd get sneered at by everyone until they found out I've been a strict vegetarian since my teens, and know more about obscure music and art than they did. My physique doesn't match my interests according to stereotypes and I've caught hell for it my whole life; however, California - specifically, Socal - is the place where I've caught the least hell for it. People here are generally willing to give you the benefit of the doubt and seem to be much more apt to err on the side of "it's cool" when they first meet you.
Yeah, like I said: I found Seattle to be, on the whole, the most superficial place I've lived, and it's been backed up by some of the things that people say in the Seattle forum... there's a dress code there that will get you shunned, disregarded, and sneered at if you don't abide, it just centers around earth-toned sweaters and REI jackets instead of board shorts and polos with starched collars. Cliques are cliques, and no one necessarily has a monopoly on exclusive, douchey behavior over another.
I will say, though, that although again, I played in a punk band, grew up poor and in the 'hood and all that... I'm also blonde-haired, blue-eyed, 6'2, and built like a tank. Consequently, all through my youth and into my adult life, people have made assumptions about me: that I'm a snob, that I'm a meathead, etc. I went to art school, and every new semester, I'd have people assume that I was a big, dumb jock until they actually saw my art or listened to me talk. My friends would bring me to a party full of hipsters and I'd get sneered at by everyone until they found out I've been a strict vegetarian since my teens, and know more about obscure music and art than they did. My physique doesn't match my interests according to stereotypes and I've caught hell for it my whole life; however, California - specifically, Socal - is the place where I've caught the least hell for it. People here are generally willing to give you the benefit of the doubt and seem to be much more apt to err on the side of "it's cool" when they first meet you.
Though I'm a woman, we sound a lot a like. People make wrong assumptions about me, too, based on my appearance. They often assume I'm a snob because of my hair or posture (ballet will do that), that I'll be judgmental of others that aren't into fitness as much as I am or that eat meat (I could care less as long as you're a good person), that I care about what other people's homes look like just because I'm an organization-nut with my own (not because I care how it looks, as some assume, but because I distract easily and really hate wasting time looking for things lol), etc. I could go on and on.
While assumptions get exhausting, I enjoy watching the lightbulb go off in someone when they finally see through the exterior and begin to truly get me. Those are the people worth keeping around, as there is more to everyone than meets the eye.
P.S. I wish I could rep. you again, but C-D won't let me yet. Great post, though.
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