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In my life I've been lucky overall and don't have much to regret. I feel pretty ok with a lot of my life choices that I've made. One thing that has really sorta sunk in lately is regarding my job. I've been working in an industry that I haven't really liked for a long time now. I really realized that about 10 years ago I should have really knuckled down and looked around to see about making some changes. I'm 47 now and while I can still change careers it gets harder and harder the older you get. You just don't always have it in you to change. I'm talkin about big changes here like going into a new line of work. It gets harder for lots of reasons, getting new job skills training maybe, then there is of course taking a possible huge pay cut and having to "start over again", things along those lines.
I'm completely burned out of the work I'm in. I have made good money over the years and am pretty competent at what I do I'm just so completely and utterly burnt out. To the point of I don't know how I'm gonna go back to it. Granted I should be lucky in that I can make a good living and am thankful for that.
I guess what I'm saying is is that I don't have a lot of regrets in my life, but not spending more time when I was a bit younger preparing for a career shift when I should have is really bothering me now. I'm feeling trapped to a degree and not sure what I can do. I have at least 15 more years before I can even think about retiring and yeah, maybe I can think about changing jobs here in the next little bit, but in reality you start thinking a bit about age discrimination and how companies would probably rather get some kid right out of college and pay him less and train him etc etc. These are things that I never thought about as a young person, but being late 40's they are things that are indeed coming into play. It's not over, but it's not as easy as I'd like it to be.
Saving more money for retirement. You just never think you're going to get to that age when you're young. I would also take more risks. I was always afraid of that. But, there is still time for me to do both.
Apart from one or two long-standing relationships that regrettably ended for one reason or another, I would have to say mouthing off to my parents during my difficult transitional teen years, and going on to ignoring them completely during my 1st year at university.
Even though we have long since kissed and made up, I still feel rather uncomfortable whenever that period in my life is touched upon.
Saving more money for retirement. You just never think you're going to get to that age when you're young. I would also take more risks. I was always afraid of that. But, there is still time for me to do both.
I'm with you, flower. I passed up opportunities when I was younger because I was afraid to step outside my comfort zone. I think my biggest regret is passing up an opportunity to spend one semester of college abroad in an exchange program. But I had never been far from home before and I was afraid I'd be homesick. Lame!
I regret not taking more risks with my love life over the years. (I made up for lost time starting around age 50, though.)
I'm more adventurous now, at age 62. For example, I went zip lining in Jamaica in June and, though I was scared on the first zip, I went for it and had a blast. The day included rugged hiking, 9 zips and 1 rappel. I'd love to do it again sometime.
I guess it's never too late to take calculated risks. It helps to have a few decades of adult wisdom under your belt so you can choose the right "risks."
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Timely topic, Chow. I'm a big believer of doing what you can to fix regrets, and if you can't, to move on. But that is oh so easier said than done! I too rarely took risks so as not to upset the proverbial apple cart. Most of the time it didn't matter anyway.
And as PJ said above, it does help to have some time and wisdom under your belt. Trying right now to balance between a devil may care attitude and my usual stuck in the mud routine. Stay tuned ....
I haven't regretted too much in my life. I'm lucky in that I've got to do most of the things that I have wanted to do (mostly through planning out my life, and then working hard towards my goals).
One thing that I totally regret though, is moving back to Wales. I spent the 1990s living in England, and it was the best time of my life. But then I made a choice to live back in Wales, because I wanted my daughter to have what I had when I was young - a close relationship to grandparents (in her case - with my parents).
But it has all gone wrong. I now realise why I was so desperate to move away from Wales in the first place! When you are away from a place, you get to forget how rubbish it all was. Now I am back, I feel like I haven't progressed in my life at all. I am stuck here once again, in a crap area, still not getting on with people I wanted to get away from (mostly my parents, but also other pain in the arse family members and local residents).
Also, I thought that I could pick up with my old school friends. And although I have met up again with several of them, I feel like I've changed a lot, because I have been away experiencing other places, whereas all they have known is the same old place. I feel like my life has moved on, whilst theirs has stayed exactly the same over the years.
But I am trying to change things, and I'm planning to move back to England. It will be a better life for my daughter, with more prospects. However, I feel in a bit of a dilemma as it is a huge upheaval, with my daughter having to change schools. Plus I don't know what the hell I will be doing, when I get there. It is all up in the air at the moment. But I know that eventually we will have a better quality of life, so it will all be worth it in the end.
Sometimes, you just have to take a chance in life, otherwise you will always just be stuck with your life as it is.
I haven't regretted too much in my life. I'm lucky in that I've got to do most of the things that I have wanted to do (mostly through planning out my life, and then working hard towards my goals).
One thing that I totally regret though, is moving back to Wales. I spent the 1990s living in England, and it was the best time of my life. But then I made a choice to live back in Wales, because I wanted my daughter to have what I had when I was young - a close relationship to grandparents (in her case - with my parents).
But it has all gone wrong. I now realise why I was so desperate to move away from Wales in the first place! When you are away from a place, you get to forget how rubbish it all was. Now I am back, I feel like I haven't progressed in my life at all. I am stuck here once again, in a crap area, still not getting on with people I wanted to get away from (mostly my parents, but also other pain in the arse family members and local residents).
Also, I thought that I could pick up with my old school friends. And although I have met up again with several of them, I feel like I've changed a lot, because I have been away experiencing other places, whereas all they have known is the same old place. I feel like my life has moved on, whilst theirs has stayed exactly the same over the years.
But I am trying to change things, and I'm planning to move back to England. It will be a better life for my daughter, with more prospects. However, I feel in a bit of a dilemma as it is a huge upheaval, with my daughter having to change schools. Plus I don't know what the hell I will be doing, when I get there. It is all up in the air at the moment. But I know that eventually we will have a better quality of life, so it will all be worth it in the end.
Sometimes, you just have to take a chance in life, otherwise you will always just be stuck with your life as it is.
Great post. I've lived in the So Cal area my whole life. I did move up north to Santa Barbara for about a year and a half for work, I was worried about getting laid off and a more secure(at the time) option was to go to one of our satellite offices that we had back then.
I think you sometimes have to do what you have to do, I agree that uprooting a kid and changing schools and all is a little rough, but kids are more resilient than we give them credit for.
In my life I've been lucky overall and don't have much to regret. I feel pretty ok with a lot of my life choices that I've made. One thing that has really sorta sunk in lately is regarding my job. I've been working in an industry that I haven't really liked for a long time now. I really realized that about 10 years ago I should have really knuckled down and looked around to see about making some changes. I'm 47 now and while I can still change careers it gets harder and harder the older you get. You just don't always have it in you to change. I'm talkin about big changes here like going into a new line of work. It gets harder for lots of reasons, getting new job skills training maybe, then there is of course taking a possible huge pay cut and having to "start over again", things along those lines.
I'm completely burned out of the work I'm in. I have made good money over the years and am pretty competent at what I do I'm just so completely and utterly burnt out. To the point of I don't know how I'm gonna go back to it. Granted I should be lucky in that I can make a good living and am thankful for that.
I guess what I'm saying is is that I don't have a lot of regrets in my life, but not spending more time when I was a bit younger preparing for a career shift when I should have is really bothering me now. I'm feeling trapped to a degree and not sure what I can do. I have at least 15 more years before I can even think about retiring and yeah, maybe I can think about changing jobs here in the next little bit, but in reality you start thinking a bit about age discrimination and how companies would probably rather get some kid right out of college and pay him less and train him etc etc. These are things that I never thought about as a young person, but being late 40's they are things that are indeed coming into play. It's not over, but it's not as easy as I'd like it to be.
Thoughts???
It's never too late to change your life. Like you have said, you still have another 15 years of work ahead of you.
But I know what you mean. The older you get, the more stuck in your ways you become! And I don't know about you, but the older you get, the more time just passed by so quickly, I have found. I feel like it was only the other day when I was in my 20s!
And yes, it is unfair, that employers would rather take on some young kid and train them up, rather than employing us oldies! It is sad that life experience and maturity doesn't count for much in some work places.
Having said that though, I think you should at least try to change things. If you don't, then you could be stuck in a rut for another 15 years - and that is a long time really. Also, you don't want to look back in years to come, and regret not changing things when you were still at a relatively younger age to do so.
Great post. I've lived in the So Cal area my whole life. I did move up north to Santa Barbara for about a year and a half for work, I was worried about getting laid off and a more secure(at the time) option was to go to one of our satellite offices that we had back then.
I think you sometimes have to do what you have to do, I agree that uprooting a kid and changing schools and all is a little rough, but kids are more resilient than we give them credit for.
Best of luck moving forward.
Lol, it looks like we were replying to each other's posts at the same time!
Thanks for your reply. Yes, the only thing I am concerned about is my daughter settling into another school in a different area. I'll be ok myself, even if I'll be stuck there without anything to do (potentially) - I just hope I don't spend too much time on City Data, if that is the case!
PJSinger...I'll be 62 in a few weeks, also. I do agree with you, a few decades of adult wisdom does help. Maybe I'll try zip lining next. LOL
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