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So how do you and your spouse balance time for kids and time for you. Because we all know we can be tired at the end of the day,but how do you find time to still be a couple, which i know is hard in these times that tell us once you have kids your whole life is them. My hubby and i are night owls, so after the kids snooze we get up and spend a few hours together just spending time together. Also we make a point to have a date night once a week, and pawn the kids off on their aunts or granparents who love em to death . So what do YOU do?
We never had time to be alone together when the kids were babies. My husband worked several jobs and we didn't have any relatives to take the kids for us. But we made a habit of talking a lot. No matter what was happening, we spent most of our time together talking, just sharing the ins and outs of the day or any other topic that interested us. Once our oldest daughter got old enough to babysit our other two, we started going out on our own. We are still don't go out all that much since our youngest is still only 6, but it's nice to know if we want a few hours to ourselves, we have the freedom to go for a bit.
We had lots of private couple time raising our children. When they were young, bedtime was 8pm on the dot. We started the bedtime rituals at 7pm so the bedtime stories were read by 8pm. After that, we spent the evening together, usually staying up until 11pm or Midnight. We would go out approximately once a week. And every quarter, we would go away for a weekend trip together without the children. They always stayed at their babysitter's house when we went out or away on trips. We never asked relatives to watch the children because we feel that's taking advantage of relatives.
Early bedtimes - even with an 11 and 8 year old. That alone frees up a ton of time and energy. Even if I let them stay up an hour later on the weekend - I can feel the difference in stress and aggravation.
Dates - morning, afternoon - just taking time to be together.
time alone - teaching them to entertain themselves and each other so that we can spend some time together;
Making each other the focus sometimes -
So how do you and your spouse balance time for kids and time for you. Because we all know we can be tired at the end of the day,but how do you find time to still be a couple, which i know is hard in these times that tell us once you have kids your whole life is them. My hubby and i are night owls, so after the kids snooze we get up and spend a few hours together just spending time together. Also we make a point to have a date night once a week, and pawn the kids off on their aunts or granparents who love em to death . So what do YOU do?
You find the time. Not every single family has the 9-5 schedule. We don't. We try to get in 5-10mins in the am & sit at the table w/our coffee. W/ a 4, 2 & 9 wk old...so, while our philosophy is not that our lives revolve around our children, at the same time, it does. A date night every wk w/ the ages also is a little impratical.
There are different seasons to parenting & marriage. Right now, "ours" is very much child centered.
Case in point, my dh asked me to watch football this afternoon. The kids will be around, but I made some of his favorite snacks to make him feel like I did value his interests.
When the kids were small we made sure they went to bed early. That gave us time alone in the evenings. We also hired a babysitter and went out a few times a month. Now that the kids are older we don't have to hire a sitter but sometimes we do order pizza for them and go out for dinner without them.
We also make time together by doing everyday things together. NFL football Sundays are big family time but my husband and I sit together on the love seat and let the kids sit elsewhere.
We usually have any important conversations, or even just chat after the kids are in bed. We also get a sitter and go out to dinner every so often. no set schedule for that, just when we feel like we need it, or when an event comes up that we want to attend.
My hubby and i are night owls, so after the kids snooze we get up and spend a few hours together just spending time together.
That must be nice. My hubby is a morning person so he goes to bed as soon as the kids are put away. I am a night owl so I am pretty grouchy in the mornings.
The way we see it is that we had 8 years of marriage without kids so now is kid time. We were always homebodies so is not like we feel deprived when we can not go out.
That must be nice. My hubby is a morning person so he goes to bed as soon as the kids are put away. I am a night owl so I am pretty grouchy in the mornings.
The way we see it is that we had 8 years of marriage without kids so now is kid time. We were always homebodies so is not like we feel deprived when we can not go out.
Yeah but what is the point of being married then if that's all you do?
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