does my son fondling himself in front of another child a foreboding sign? (parent, girls)

[worriedmomof4boys]

My eleven year old son's bus driver informed me that another parent came to her saying her daughter told her that my son exposed himself and fondled himself saying how good it felt and making her promise not to tell. Is this the harbinger of some deeper disturbing tendencies or normal inappropriate boy behavior that can be corrurected?

[Pitt Chick]

An eleven year old should know better/been taught better.
What did he say when you asked him about it?

[Billy_J]

It could be some other kid told him to do that, said girls like that sort of thing, yada yada yada...

Just tell him not to do that. Explain it is a "nasty" thing to do. Maybe find a law against that sort of thing and explain what can happen to people who do that, etc.

[Tell-the-Truth]

Have you spoken to your son?

[gimme it]

It doesn't sound promising.

[BirdieBelle]

You need to ask the bus driver, and you need to talk to the other parent. Get ALL the facts first.

I have a friend whose son compulsively grabs at his crotch, but he does not expose himself. He also is 5.

11 is too old to do this innocently, but it's a bit early to label your son "disturbed."

Get the facts from the involved parties first.

[no kudzu]

By all means do not tell the kid it is a "nasty" thing to do. Everybody and his brother (and sister) masturbates. It is natural and healthy. You should let him know it is NOT something he should do in front of others and should only be done in private and one does not talk about it to others.
Talk directly to the bus driver and ask what exactly he or she witnessed, how often it has happened and if somebody probably put him up to it.

I think he is at the age of being very much aware of the changes taking place in his body and you need to be open with him about sexuality and puberty. the only thing inappropriate is his doing it in front of others and talking about it.

[robertpolyglot]

Originally Posted by worriedmomof4boys

My eleven year old son's bus driver informed me that another parent came to her saying her daughter told her that my son exposed himself and fondled himself saying how good it felt and making her promise not to tell. Is this the harbinger of some deeper disturbing tendencies or normal inappropriate boy behavior that can be corrurected?

Yeah, it isn't typical. The "making her promise not to tell" is the more perplexing part and needs looking into. Kids are weird. They can all grow up in the same household, and only one kid will exhibit some less than conventional behaviors. Was this ON THE BUS? And he thought he could get away with that?

[DewDropInn]

Originally Posted by worriedmomof4boys

Is this the harbinger ...

It's a harbinger that you need to sit your son down, ask him about it, and have a long, serious talk with him about what's appropriate conduct and what isn't. (This isn't.)

[purehuman]

DewDropInns right...talk to the boy, so it'll never happen again.