How to give kids a great childhood when both parents work? (sitter, activities)

[tiredtired]

WOW, she's 2 and a half...what's to miss out on?..except maybe playing in her own back yard during the day...

I'm really looking ahead to the future rather than right now at the moment.

I'm on the other side in that I feel that the money saved on daycare, and a parent at home with the child... is a big savings , and far superior to both parents working...At her young age I feel a mom or dad with her is more beneficial to her. No one will love your child like you do...she's much better off with one of you at home...but I know there's a lot of working parents out there who'd disagree...so that's just my own personal opinion.

My wife personally feels that she would rather spend 40 hours a week at the office than at home. Criticize her if you like, but that is her decision and we have to work with what we have. I'm not able to leave my employment for financial reasons.

[L2DB]

There's nothing wrong with daycare. Build social skills, do activities, etc. As I said before, just give them quality time when you're home and it's all good.

I'm sure you'll be able to work something out when she gets older. These aren't new issues.

[lkb0714]

Originally Posted by twoincomes

Hi all,

My wife and I are a two income family, and we have a young daughter age 2 1/2. We're a two income family, and I'm feeling a little bad about it.

We have our daughter in a great daycare and she's getting a full plate of activities this summer. But, I see flyers for kids drama camp or scouting camp or vacation bible school, or many other activities, and I realize that there are things that she'll miss out on.

I wanted to get some opinions about what we can do to ensure our child can have an interesting and fun chiildhood at the same time we hold down our day jobs.

I'm also wondering if there are benefits for our child for having two working parents in lieu of a stay at home parent.

Thanks

Don't sweat the camps. They are not a big deal. Especially at 2.

As for positives for two working parents, daughters of working mothers are more likely to go to college and beyond, than their counterparts in SAH families. Girls of working mothers also tend to be more independent than their peers, and have higher socioemotional scores. Sons, in middle class families were mom worked scored higher in several cognitive tests (in low SE classes the reverse was true).

[Missingatlanta]

Does your daycare do school trips? If so, can you take off to attend as a chaperone. Our daughter's daycare does a field trip every two weeks and allows parents to attend. I've gone a few times with DD.

[mom2justynsarah]

It's all about the QUALITY of time you give your daughter when you are not working... then the quantity of time.

My husband and I work from home. So we both can technically work day and night. But as soon as the kids come home from school/camp, we put our computer down and PAY attention to them. Weekends are ALL about family. NO WORK!!! You can do it too!

[Mattie]

I never considered camps as the epitome of childhood experiences. Both my spouse and I worked when our eldest was little. We made the most of time off, and concentrated on things a toddler/preschooler would enjoy. When I was working and DH was home, it became daddy/me or mommy/me time. We both loved having oldest to ourselves for a few hours.

I think you are worrying unnecessarily about your situation, which is not at all unusual.

[no kudzu]

Boy- are you ever borrowing trouble. She is 2.5 so she is probably still napping now so anything other than daycare is a non issue. When the time comes worry about it then. If you get caught up in "what ifs" this early in the game you will drive yourself crazy. This from a mom and Step mother of 7 kids, 5 of whom are grown, never went to any camp except scout camp and all of whom are college graduates with successful lives.

[ChrisFromChicago]

Originally Posted by twoincomes

Hi all,

My wife and I are a two income family, and we have a young daughter age 2 1/2. We're a two income family, and I'm feeling a little bad about it.

Well we dont feel bad about it (though right now my wife is looking for a job). Too each their own. Feel bad. Quit. easy.

Originally Posted by twoincomes

We have our daughter in a great daycare and she's getting a full plate of activities this summer. But, I see flyers for kids drama camp or scouting camp or vacation bible school, or many other activities, and I realize that there are things that she'll miss out on.

grass is always greener I suppose. . .

Originally Posted by twoincomes

I wanted to get some opinions about what we can do to ensure our child can have an interesting and fun chiildhood at the same time we hold down our day jobs.

I'm also wondering if there are benefits for our child for having two working parents in lieu of a stay at home parent.

Thanks

well its a bit ironic that you are feeling guilty about things that would require you to drop your kid off somewhere else. I for one like daycare as an experience and would put that above vacation bible school, etc. Especially for a 2 year old

Usually money is why both people work. . so its not always a choice. I don't think there is any negative to the child if they go to daycare (usually a established benefit).

I would think of taking time off to have fun during the summer/winter is the balance. Never let a vacation day go unused, its like stealing from your kids.

[clarksvillemom]

We both work but have made sacrifices to allow us to be home at 5, don't work at night, don't work on weekends. By sacrifices, I mean not volunteering for extra stuff or trips that might get md promoted but would take be away from the kids more. . Every minute - except for once a week date night- is for the kids when were not at work and we have loads of fun. I've also asked to work from home some days so that can help with strange school or camp schedules. My kids have gone to day camps and we've carpooled or hired a college student to pick up, if at an inconvenient time like 1. In other words, you can make it work. I think it's good for my kids to see both of us working as we'll as making time for them. The days of mom staying at home are just not realistic for most people, nor would I want to give up my job.

[aliss2]

Well, how do you even know she will want to do those things? Let her choose her own path (with guidance, of course) and cross that bridge when you get there.