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I've been told being a waiter is a great way to avoid child support. They can only take 50% maximum of his earnings, which is like $3 an hour or so. He makes his living off the tips and pays only a fraction of his true income toward the child.
Yup, I've worked with a few people like that. One guy in particular had 6 kids that he refused to help support. He was 40 something years old and took jobs as a busser. His wages were only $3.64, so there wasn't much that could be taken for his 6 kids. I always thought it was sad that he would hold himself back financially like that just to screw over his kids. Whats worse is he had visitation rights with his kids, so we would see them for a few hours a couple times a week. I just couldn't imagine being the mother and having to let this man see kids that he refuses to help support.
It depends on socioeconomic condition and origin also what amount of attention parents pay on their children. If parents are very busy with their job then it’s obvious that their children will receive less attention. Moderator Cut
Last edited by Jaded; 09-10-2013 at 09:15 PM..
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I am supposed to get $73.50 every two weeks, but I haven't received anything since January when my ex lost his job. He is either working under the table or his live in girlfriend pays for everything, but in the meantime I don't even have a little extra for help - and I do, literally, everything since he doesn't even have a car.
For my older daughter - she's now over 18 - I received $150 a month and I had to fight tooth and nail to get that. I have a friend who has two kids and has never received child support ever. Ever. His new wife pays for everything too.
If you don't want kids, don't make them. But if you already have kids, well, you have to support them no matter how much you may not like their mother or having to be responsible. I wish these men would grow up and see how much they are damaging their relationship with their children.
Sometimes a new spouse can be instrumental in the child support issue. Either positively or negatively. If he/she has children of her own she may resent how much "family money" is going to children from a previous relationship and think most of the income should go towards the new family. I've seen that several times. In fact DH was a victim of a step mother who resented her new husband making payments to his mother and did everything to sabotage the relationship. This pettiness carried over into her old age to the degree she tried to keep him from a small monetary gift his father left him in his will.
I married a man with 3 children. We struggled in our early marriage but I knew ( stories from my single parent friends) how hard it can be financially so I upped the child support on my own to help out some more. I think this fact contributed to a comfortable relationship with his ex and especially the children.
I'm not a step mom but did date a couple of men with kids and this issue goes both ways. While it is wrong for a new spouse to attempt the parent to stop child support, sometimes the child support is increased because of the new spouse's salary. The men I dated for paying so much in child support, alimony and mortgage and had they married me the child support at least likely would have increased because I was making more than these guys. They were paying this money (and rightfully so)there was so little money for dating and it's partly why I split with them (that and the other issues like drama). I stayed friends with these guys but one did remarry and the new wife found herself helping to support his previous family. There's no way I would want my salary to help support a man's other family so I avoid dating men with kids (including grown).
My son received $900 a month from his dad for child support until he turned 18. This started in 1995 and just enden this May when he graduated from high school. It was court ordered and he never missed a payment. I realize that I was extremely lucky and this is not how it generally works. I agree that there are too many "dads" who don't support their child sufficiently.
VERY SMALL PERCENTAGE? I wonder if that is true or just gossip? I know there are many dead beat dads out there but there are also many dads who pay on time every time.. I think this might be a case of a few bad apples spoiling the whole bunch. I would seriously be interested in seeing some REAL numbers concerning this issue.
I once read--and this was at least ten years ago--that the percentage of men who do NOT pay their child support is around 28%. I don't recall where it was, and I don't have a link.
I have to dig out my agreement. I think CS is paid until my girls are 21...I always assumed that once they went to college, all of that would go towards living expenses at college. no need for me to keep any of it.
My ex just got remarried and has two new step-kids whose father is deceased. His new wife has not worked in 12 years so I assume that there was sufficient life insurance. And, yep, he has requested a decrease in child support payments. (they just bought a new home that 'needs' extensive renovations/additions, and of course they want to buy a vacation home as well)
His argument is that now that his wife will be home to supervise while he travels for work, my youngest will be spending more time at his home. She has said she wants to do that, but I don't think it will really happen.
In NY, where we got divorced, CS is not impacted by the number of nights spent in either parent's home. Visitation does not factor into it. That is not the case in the state where we now live, so I think that is where he got his idea. What I don't get is what expenses he thinks will be lessened significantly by her living with him more often, because I pay for all her activities, unreimbursed medical, dental, ortho, and the majority of her personal items.
I'm thinking of suggesting that we make it based on a daily rate. Divide her share of the support by the number of days in the month. Then at the end of the month, count up the number of nights she spends at his house and pay me according to that.
I'm worried, but I guess I'm lucky he pays regularly.
My Dad was ordered to pay my Mom $60 a week. I was around 14 years old- it bothered him so much he cut off contact from both of us. What a jerk. Prior to that they were good friends and I saw him all the time. Such a meager amount affected him that much that he did something so drastic. When he passes, I won't go to his funeral since it was so easy to turn his back.
Anyway, onto the OP's question.
I know someone paying $700 a month who makes 36K a year. I think that's pretty high. It's stressing the new girlfriend/family out because it eats up so much of his salary. But that's what the judge ordered so that's what he has to pay.
I receive that amount from my ex husband, but he makes almost twice that amount.
Someone is getting hosed and someone is getting off really easy! Maybe I need to contact a child support lawyer....might be modification time. LOL
A few years ago I was at the child support office inquiring on how to change my court order to a state order so I wouldn't have to fight in court if non-payment was ever an issue.
The worker I spoke to told me I was incredibly lucky that I got the amount I did and got it on time. He said he works cases where men won't pay $100 a month. That put it in perspective for me. Support is such a hotly debated topic, maligned by many people yet so many get away with not paying what they should.
It totally depends on state laws. My state has a minimum amount that is paid regardless of whether the person assigned to pay is employed. If you do have a job, it's a percentage based on annual salary. We can go back to court when there's been a material change in the payer's salary to get an increase or decrease.
My xBIL deliberately didn't work for years and eventually landed in jail for failure to pay child support to a child from a previous relationship. He was sentenced to be on probation until the child turns 18 and can go back to jail again if he stops paying (has happened once). In my state, child support cannot be based on the new spouse's salary, just on the parent's, so his required amount didn't change when he married my sister (who has a good job).
When they got divorced sis threatened to castrate him if he stopped paying her support for their child, and so far he's being good.
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