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If she finds out something is wrong, like I did sixteen years ago, she will need someone to support her and to provide a second set of ears. It happens. Fortunately, not often, but please don't underestimate the potential for bad news.
Ugh. Then she can certainly phone someone if/when that happens. Is there any reason why this should be expected at this point?
Because she has shown how trustworthy she is on that regard.
But, after this experience, maybe she's grown up a little. Her finding a job is a good sign.
If it were my daughter, I'd make her support her own child, but I'd do what I was planning to do otherwise for her in terms of helping with college expenses.
I will admit I somewhat miscalculated the situation in the previous thread. I thought she was just a typical lazy teenager and might grow up on her own after a few years. Obviously the problems were far deeper.
But, after this experience and getting a job, maybe she's grown up a little.
If it were my daughter, I'd make her support her own child, but I'd do what I was planning to do otherwise for her in terms of helping with college expenses.
I agree. And I wouldn't just write her off because of some negative past experiences. It's her first baby and she is still very young. Nothing wrong with offering to help and just being there for her.
I agree. And I wouldn't just write her off because of some negative past experiences. It's her first baby and she is still very young. Nothing wrong with offering to help and just being there for her.
Well, only as long as there's enough $$$ for DD2 to go to school. She'll probably get a free ride while DD1 gets nothing.
Does anyone wonder why this girl intentionally got pregnant at 19? She was desperate for love. That is so sad to me.
Yet I'm guessing you are perfectly fine with aborting the BABY?
Nope. Your guess couldn't be more wrong.
I'm the person telling the OP she needs to help her daughter so she can deliver a healthy baby. She doesn't seem very interested in that. I've not seen one post where the OP has said, "I want to make sure my grandchild is a healthy, full-term baby." Just a lot of nonsense and excuses about why she can't help do that.
If she finds out something is wrong, like I did sixteen years ago, she will need someone to support her and to provide a second set of ears. It happens. Fortunately, not often, but please don't underestimate the potential for bad news.
Agreed. It's important to have someone along for any major medical appointment. A second set of ears for ourselves, our kids, our parents is always a good thing.
Quote:
Originally Posted by steelstress
You need to relax. Any of this can happen during any appointment. So, what you're saying is, she shouldn't attend any appointment alone?
And as for transportation, I don't think that is what the discussion is about. She's a big girl, now treat her like one.
Do you have a family? Did you not attend with your wife during the first ultrasound? I think it's pretty normal to bring someone along for the major appointments and the first ultrasound is a major appointment. Heck, one of the reasons we have and create families is for support during our lives.
But, after this experience, maybe she's grown up a little. Her finding a job is a good sign.
If it were my daughter, I'd make her support her own child, but I'd do what I was planning to do otherwise for her in terms of helping with college expenses.
I will admit I somewhat miscalculated the situation in the previous thread. I thought she was just a typical lazy teenager and might grow up on her own after a few years. Obviously the problems were far deeper.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissTerri
I agree. And I wouldn't just write her off because of some negative past experiences. It's her first baby and she is still very young. Nothing wrong with offering to help and just being there for her.
Ivory has already said she's doing all she can to encourage dd#1 to continue to go to school. Dd#1 isn't being written off. The odds are, Dd#1 doesn't want to go to school at this point; and/or she's indicated to her mother that she's not interested in that prospect. As for the money saved for college, I personally see nothing wrong with still withholding it, but don't agree that she should just give it to her daughter right now just because she's pregnant. College is still an option down the road.
Ivory has already said she's doing all she can to encourage dd#1 to continue to go to school. Dd#1 isn't being written off. The odds are, Dd#1 doesn't want to go to school at this point; and/or she's indicated to her mother that she's not interested in that prospect. As for the money saved for college, I personally see nothing wrong with still withholding it, but don't agree that she should just give it to her daughter right now just because she's pregnant. College is still an option down the road.
My post wasn't really meant to be directed at the op. It was more in response to steelstress's posting which to me sound like he or she thinks that the op should wash her hands of the situation and her daughter and offer nothing in terms of support or help because she is "grown" and "irresponsible" and therefore doesn't deserve or need any type of support or help from her parents.
But, after this experience, maybe she's grown up a little. Her finding a job is a good sign.
If it were my daughter, I'd make her support her own child, but I'd do what I was planning to do otherwise for her in terms of helping with college expenses.
Well, it's a little too early to tell. I'd see if she can commit to one semester, then pony up for the next.
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You need to relax. Any of this can happen during any appointment. So, what you're saying is, she shouldn't attend any appointment alone?