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Old 07-07-2015, 07:26 PM
 
22,473 posts, read 12,003,345 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattie View Post
You can only opine based on your own family experience, as can I. I've raised three teens, and had countless others around the house. Lying was not acceptable. We value honestly above all else. We also weren't knee-jerk reactionaries, and I think that makes it easier for kids to be truthful.
Lying was not acceptable in our house either---and our child knew it, too. --- and knew there were consequences for doing so. Yet...

My point is that you (or anybody else) can not say with 100% certainty that your teen never told a lie.
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Old 07-07-2015, 07:45 PM
 
Location: tampa bay
7,126 posts, read 8,655,613 times
Reputation: 11772
Quote:
Originally Posted by BOS2IAD View Post
Lying was not acceptable in our house either---and our child knew it, too. --- and knew there were consequences for doing so. Yet...

My point is that you (or anybody else) can not say with 100% certainty that your teen never told a lie.
Exactly...and to say that her three teens and all their friends never lied is something she would never have or could never have known...I'm not calling the poster a liar...and many teens that stretched the truth now and again go onto be very successful and well adjusted adults...
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Old 07-07-2015, 07:47 PM
 
1,242 posts, read 1,690,327 times
Reputation: 3658
If it helps settle things, my daughter may lie to save her skin. Not on every occasion for sure, but on something big like this I can definitely see the "I was holding it for a friend" excuse. I heard a few posters mention that if I raised her right she'd come clean, so I guess that means I'm a bad parent. Anyhow I'll be bypassing all of that fuss by taking the items and waiting a few days to let the panic set in before telling her that I found it, and I'm worried. From there I'll just let the conversation dictate punishment or actions.
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Old 07-07-2015, 07:56 PM
 
1,242 posts, read 1,690,327 times
Reputation: 3658
Quote:
Originally Posted by BamaBlue View Post
Are you SURE it's tea.
100% but that doesn't mean she hasn't smoked something else with the pipe. At this juncture I'm going to assume she's smoked something. I'm also very worried about using blotting papers for a rolling paper. Time for a talk!
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Old 07-07-2015, 08:16 PM
 
Location: tampa bay
7,126 posts, read 8,655,613 times
Reputation: 11772
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eazine View Post
If it helps settle things, my daughter may lie to save her skin. Not on every occasion for sure, but on something big like this I can definitely see the "I was holding it for a friend" excuse. I heard a few posters mention that if I raised her right she'd come clean, so I guess that means I'm a bad parent. Anyhow I'll be bypassing all of that fuss by taking the items and waiting a few days to let the panic set in before telling her that I found it, and I'm worried. From there I'll just let the conversation dictate punishment or actions.
If it was a fact that all of us who had/have teens that tell a lie to get out of trouble were bad parents...then it would be safe to say every parent on this forum would suck...well I guess with the exception of one... I remember my pediatrician once told me...little children,little problems...bigger children...well you get the idea...sending good thoughts your way...
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Old 07-07-2015, 08:57 PM
 
13,981 posts, read 25,958,820 times
Reputation: 39926
Quote:
Originally Posted by BOS2IAD View Post
Lying was not acceptable in our house either---and our child knew it, too. --- and knew there were consequences for doing so. Yet...

My point is that you (or anybody else) can not say with 100% certainty that your teen never told a lie.
Sorry, I disagree. I find most teens to be honest, including my own. Which is not to say they never did anything they weren't supposed to, but they didn't lie about it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Irishiis49 View Post
Exactly...and to say that her three teens and all their friends never lied is something she would never have or could never have known...I'm not calling the poster a liar...and many teens that stretched the truth now and again go onto be very successful and well adjusted adults...
Calling me pathetic for believing my kids to be honest is the same thing. What I find pathetic is parents who can't have a conversation with their kids about difficult subjects because they can't be sure they'll get the truth from them. Thinking all teens are liars is just setting them up to fail. Why should they tell the truth when they aren't believed anyway?
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Old 07-07-2015, 08:58 PM
 
13,981 posts, read 25,958,820 times
Reputation: 39926
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eazine View Post
100% but that doesn't mean she hasn't smoked something else with the pipe. At this juncture I'm going to assume she's smoked something. I'm also very worried about using blotting papers for a rolling paper. Time for a talk!
Yes, it is.
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Old 07-07-2015, 09:12 PM
 
Location: USA
366 posts, read 494,257 times
Reputation: 874
Quote:
Originally Posted by mrfoe View Post
A little pot won't hurt as long as it's not abused.
Except she's 15, a minor living in her mother's house. If she wants to get high she can do it when and where it's legal and she's an independent adult. Until then, whether or not it is going to "hurt" is up to her parents, period.
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Old 07-07-2015, 09:13 PM
 
Location: Portland, OR
424 posts, read 381,904 times
Reputation: 686
Maybe her friend sold her what she thought was weed, but it turned out to be tea? Or maybe she's just a really bad tuba player?
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Old 07-07-2015, 09:23 PM
 
Location: tampa bay
7,126 posts, read 8,655,613 times
Reputation: 11772
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattie View Post
Sorry, I disagree. I find most teens to be honest, including my own. Which is not to say they never did anything they weren't supposed to, but they didn't lie about it.



Calling me pathetic for believing my kids to be honest is the same thing. What I find pathetic is parents who can't have a conversation with their kids about difficult subjects because they can't be sure they'll get the truth from them. Thinking all teens are liars is just setting them up to fail. Why should they tell the truth when they aren't believed anyway?
So the only "honest" people are people who have never told a lie?... Which leaves Abe Lincoln and Jesus...and nobody is calling anyone a liar or pathetic...really
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