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Here's my thing - I recently read one of those "costs of raising a child " article and the take away was that parents/people really underestimated how much extracurricular activities add up. I know with my daughter - some of her activites have been very expensive and some of those costs have been for things not directly related to the cost of the instructor/facility/needed safety equipment. She took ballet through our city and in order to participate in the recital - I had to buy the costume. $45 for specific leotard that she wore for a 20 min program. She was 4years old at the time. The husband and I grumbled but paid up. It wasn't a financial hardship for us - but I do wonder how some of the younger parents afforded it and wish that I had suggested some sort of compromise.
My kid's dance studio lets parents do a payment plan for recital fee and costume. So if someone has a problem with paying they can ask about a payment plan. We re-sold our recital costumes in consignment sales but didn't get much money back for them. Not that it matters at that point.
I do find many parents underestimate how much these activities cost. Most of my daughter's friends are not enrolled in activities. She wanted her best friend to take gymnastics with her and so I asked the parents about it, but they said no, they didn't want to pay $75 a month for the class.
I wish the article gave the ages of the kids. Participation trophies ended by 2nd grade at the latest for the sports my kids were in.
I know they didn't carry much meaning for them once they began actually earning trophies, but at the time they got them, they were thrilled, and maybe it even encouraged them to keep on playing. The children of a pro may not need that extra push to play, but is there really anything wrong for the average child just starting out in organized sports?
James Harrison, huh?
I wonder if James Harrison refused his 2010 AFC Championship watch? You see, the Steelers didn't win the Super Bowl that year. They lost it. And every year, NFL teams who lose the Super Bowl award diamond-encrusted gold rings to their players. Well, the 2010 Steelers decided to go with diamond-encrusted gold watches instead of rings.
Do you think James Harrison happily cashed those contract bonuses for making the All-Pro 2nd Team in 2007 and 2009? Not the 1st Team but the 2nd Team, for players who are really good but not the best? NFL contracts award bonuses for every conceivable individual award.
Do you think he objects to all those Division Championship banners at Heinz Field? Eight teams win division every season, but only one team wins the Super Bowl (and sometimes it's not even a division winner).
He either has that watch or he sold it. He cashed all those checks. He didn't reject any of them.
I had kids who played sports. It was always about having fun and bonding with teammates more than 'being better than everyone else'. My sons and daughter were hard enough on themselves when they lost. They didn't need me being a jerk to them to make them feel even worse.
Oh, and they never won any state titles, yet the postseason banquet with the coach's awards (categories like MVP, Best Newcomer, Unsung Hero, etc.) were tons of fun for everyone.
That's right, fun.
Anyone remember fun?
It beats the hell out of that jackass parent berating a child for 'not being good enough!'.
There is a much bigger problem in kids sports than the youngest kids getting participation trophies while it's still just for learning and fun. With 3 boys in sports, those things ended by 8 years old and were NEVER a problem. What does cause problems is these overly competitive dads who put significant stress on 8,9, 10 year olds. Parents who expect their 9 year old to be a future pro, get a D1 scholarship, and burn them out. Coaches who expect kids to overplay and play year round leading to completely preventable and potentially life altering injuries. Berating little kids when they lose or make mistakes instead of letting them learn. Participation trophies for 6 year olds are not even CLOSE to being a problem. Trust me. I have a 7 year old who is still learning to play a sport and LOVES the medals they get for participating and a 14 year old who cherishes the medals he gets only when he wins. Kids grow up and evolve with their sports.
Throwing a fit over a participation trophy for a 6 or 8 year old LITTLE KID is a sign of a future toxic sports parent.
I wonder if James Harrison refused his 2010 AFC Championship watch? You see, the Steelers didn't win the Super Bowl that year. They lost it. And every year, NFL teams who lose the Super Bowl award diamond-encrusted gold rings to their players. Well, the 2010 Steelers decided to go with diamond-encrusted gold watches instead of rings.
Do you think James Harrison happily cashed those contract bonuses for making the All-Pro 2nd Team in 2007 and 2009? Not the 1st Team but the 2nd Team, for players who are really good but not the best? NFL contracts award bonuses for every conceivable individual award.
Do you think he objects to all those Division Championship banners at Heinz Field? Eight teams win division every season, but only one team wins the Super Bowl (and sometimes it's not even a division winner).
He either has that watch or he sold it. He cashed all those checks. He didn't reject any of them.
I had kids who played sports. It was always about having fun and bonding with teammates more than 'being better than everyone else'. My sons and daughter were hard enough on themselves when they lost. They didn't need me being a jerk to them to make them feel even worse.
Oh, and they never won any state titles, yet the postseason banquet with the coach's awards (categories like MVP, Best Newcomer, Unsung Hero, etc.) were tons of fun for everyone.
That's right, fun.
Anyone remember fun?
It beats the hell out of that jackass parent berating a child for 'not being good enough!'.
Not a parent, but I have no problem with participation trophies. The kids involve in the sports put in the time and effort to participate in the sport. That's effort that should be recognized. They know they didn't win, unless you think your kids are stupid. But yes, ENCOURAGE effort. Because maybe next time they'll push for that extra step that makes all the difference.
But yeah, it really is all about fun when they are kids. Ever watch Talladega Nights? Ricky Bobby screaming "If you're not first you're last" through the whole thing until his father tells him that was just some stupid crap he made up while drunk? Don't be Ricky Bobby's drunk dad.
I was the valedictorian of my graduating high school class. Were the people who came in behind me just dummies who should have just planned to work at McDonald's for the rest of their lives? After all, they didn't "win" the prize. Tell the student from my class who became a heart surgeon that she lost back in high school.
There is nothing wrong with recognizing effort or celebrating a good time. And the truth is, success is a spectrum in adulthood, not necessarily a binary win-or-lose situation.
I've been working alongside the "participation trophy" generation for some time. They're a pretty spectacular bunch for the most part.
Jeez. Buncha killjoys. If a participation trophy is going to totally distort your child's worldview, maybe you haven't been giving them that much of a foundation then.
When did that begin with the first two stages (T-ball and coach pitch) .... millennial generation?
At least 30 years they've been doing that. Dunno how else they would do it. It's not as if 5 year olds are coordinated enough to pitch or hit a moving target...
When did that begin with the first two stages (T-ball and coach pitch) .... millennial generation?
Quote:
Originally Posted by LO28SWM
At least 30 years they've been doing that. Dunno how else they would do it. It's not as if 5 year olds are coordinated enough to pitch or hit a moving target...
Oh I see. It's limited to 5-year-olds.
Older kids need not apply. Recall being 7 and not the youngest kid in the 'hood, playing baseball on the back lot. Pitcher would toss the ball softly, sometimes underhanded, and hitters would take their cuts.
Boy were we backward in the early 50s!!!!!
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