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I just want to quit. Why can't anyone encourage me to just ****ing quit? I don't want this anymore. Somebody encourage me. Has anyone done something like what I want to do? What happened?
Well, okay. I'm a lot older than you but I felt the same way at your age. I did quit and I got another job that was even worse.
You could buy a small RV and tour the country for a while and you might find yourself. You could go to Europe and live on the cheap, as someone already mentioned. You could participate in some workshops or retreats, as I think somebody also mentioned.
Getting AWAY and seeing other things really does help. It frees your mind from all the pressure and craziness and allows you to be open to other possibilities.
Pay off the car and keep the 401K though. Quit if you need to and work part time somewhere or part time jobs while you travel around in the RV.
As a (civilian) Inspector General for the Army, I don't recommend that you join the Army. I realize the the 'Man Up" comments are made in jest. It's simply sad that someone with enough guts to post that they have depression gets this sort of reply, even as a lighthearted comment.
Oh good lord, first off-key word here, civilian. Ease up Francis, the kid ain't on the ledge. Army Strong-Hooah!
Fine. Quit. Won't make your self-esteem problems go away. Won't make your life more enjoyable. Won't make you have to not work hard. Won't guarantee anything except now you don't have a steady income stream.
Look. All jobs suck at some point. If you're a developer/programmer/IT person at a trading company, most likely the high stress of a technical position is combined with that of a trader. Get out. Living in Chicago I saw those folks every day near the Board of Trade. They were in their mid 30s and looked all drained. Chain smoking. Drinking. Stressed out. They all drove sports cars but did they look happy? Nope.
If you have the qualifications and background education you can go anywhere with that. Come on out to Seattle and find a job with a local IT company. It's laid back here. Folks go to work in casual clothing. Most folks I know who work for Microsoft (and aren't contractors) like working there. Boeing is a mixed bag. Then there's medical IT fields which sound extremely intriguing.
You are obviously a smart person. Think logically. Apply to other jobs first then quit. But don't go out with a bang ... they won't give you a recommendation. Develop a thick skin, eat your words, and respectfully give your two weeks notice once you land a new job. If you have to take a class and just study at nights for a few months to get more qualifications, it's worth it.
Good luck.
RE: manning up ... all I gotta say is that it takes a man to have conviction. Conviction and strength of character are what define a man. This guy is convinced that he wants out, just needs that extra push to do so. If we give it we gotta assume he knows the risks. Trials and tribulations can help if we just learn from them. Good luck man.
caldus, my husband is a software engineer and last year around summer time he decided to look for another job. He wasn't happy w/his employer w/whom he had worked almost 10yrs. I gave him the go ahead to look all over the country and he got a lot of responses. There is definitely a demand for software engineers and the like. So my advice would be to put your resume out there and see what kind of hits you get.
Also, I think you need to be in a company where everyone else around you is also doing the same thing as you. Right now you are in a company whose main objective is not software but investing, so you don't have people around you who you can relate with or vice versa.
If you decide to not work for a while then I would say definitely pay off the car. If you are not going to have income coming in then you want to be completely debt free. Is this the job you've had since getting your degree? Did you live somewhere else and move to Chicago for this job?
I can hear the frustration in your writing and you do have an option. You can leave. BUT don't hurt your chances of a better tomorrow because you want the fleeting satisfaction of telling them 'take this job and shove it'!
They don't care about you? Fine. Then you care about yourself and take the right steps that will bring you success in the future.
Having a job you hate does really suck. That said, it would be a mistake to quit when you have nothing else. When you finally do look for work after moping around for a year how are you going to explain that year to a future employer? It won't look good for you.
Stay out of relationships for now. It wouldn't be fair to someone else. People do not like being around depressed unhappy people. Get help with your emotional problems first. I would think that any decent counselor would discourage you from quitting your job. It is better to have your mind occupied rather than have all your time free to wallow around in how depressed and bitter you feel.
I can tell by your post that are a person that is very capable person as far as making something. After reading your opening line I thought you were going to say you were broke. My suggestion would be to think outside of the box. First get counseling, then do that. You have some money put aside. Have you thought about starting your own business involving something you do like? yes there is risk, but if you are going to quit your job it may be a better option than doing nothing or playing and draining your savings for a year.
See that's the problem. I'm "too smart" to quit, so I'm ****ing stuck. Or at least I feel that way. I have no one in my life. Absolutely no one. I live several hundred miles away from my immediate family and have no friends or girlfriend. I have no one to nudge me in the right direction. I have all of this money and I have no idea what to do with it. I know that I just want to leave this job though. I'm typically not an irrational person by any means but I have noticed myself starting to become that way for the last year or so. Would it really be that hard to find a way for someone like me to make money? Wouldn't I be extremely driven to find new ways if I know I now don't have a steady income stream? Plus I would have SO much more time to pursue new interests. One idea I had for example was making iPhone/Android apps using my existing software skills and make money off of them. Have a small, yet steady stream of income coming in while I do small side jobs for people under the table. I have no interest in ever having another corporate job like this ever again so why would I even want the recommendation?
See that's the problem. I'm "too smart" to quit, so I'm ****ing stuck. Or at least I feel that way. I have no one in my life. Absolutely no one. I live several hundred miles away from my immediate family and have no friends or girlfriend. I have no one to nudge me in the right direction. I have all of this money and I have no idea what to do with it. I know that I just want to leave this job though. I'm typically not an irrational person by any means but I have noticed myself starting to become that way for the last year or so. Would it really be that hard to find a way for someone like me to make money? Wouldn't I be extremely driven to find new ways if I know I now don't have a steady income stream? Plus I would have SO much more time to pursue new interests. One idea I had for example was making iPhone/Android apps using my existing software skills and make money off of them. Have a small, yet steady stream of income coming in while I do small side jobs for people under the table. I have no interest in ever having another corporate job like this ever again so why would I even want the recommendation?
I don't know enough about the business you are in to know how sound of an investment your idea is. You would have to weigh the risks yourself and decide. I really hope it works out if you do it. As far as not wanting a corporate job, I don't blame you. I just think taking a year off with no income is a big mistake.
Another thing that was mentioned in this thread was losing health insurance. I am self employed and I buy my own policy. It is a high deductible/catastrophic policy and the premiums are low enough to be affordable. I would save my financial if one of us needed an operation or something big. Maybe look into that if insurance is a concern.
One thing that was mentioned in this thread someplace
What particular aspects of your job do you find most aggravating? Do you think you can sit down with your boss and try to mitigate those aspects? Might as well ask for what you want. The worse they can do is fire you, then you won't have to wonder about quitting.
Sounds like maybe you enjoy the type of work you do (since you suggested you might do something similar if you quit) but not the conditions under which you work?
As for relationships and not knowing anyone. Yeah, the former condition generally follows the latter. You'll have to get out and meet people to find one you like. Or they'll find you and you won't have to worry about finding yourself.
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