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Old 03-05-2013, 01:24 PM
 
Location: NY
9,130 posts, read 20,103,684 times
Reputation: 11713

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He was probably making assumptions, being your co-worker, that your general financial level and health are equivalent to his based on similar salary.

Either way, your financial picture is none of his business, whether or not it is the same or vastly different, and whether or not you were a billionaire or didn't have two nickels to rub together.
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Old 03-05-2013, 08:37 PM
 
1,263 posts, read 3,292,167 times
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I've noticed that people tend to assume income determines financial position, IE that people making the same pay as them are also making the same financial decisions. I've had co-workers marvel at my ability to buy a used car with cash...while they puffed away at their $200/mo in cigarettes and talked about the $500 they just lost at a casino.
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Old 03-05-2013, 08:49 PM
 
1,855 posts, read 3,622,071 times
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On the other side of that coin, I don't engage in any of the wasteful activities you describe, and I marvel at my co-workers' ability to buy 600-700k homes with a salary basically equivalent to mine.

Quote:
Originally Posted by LOL_Whut View Post
I've noticed that people tend to assume income determines financial position, IE that people making the same pay as them are also making the same financial decisions. I've had co-workers marvel at my ability to buy a used car with cash...while they puffed away at their $200/mo in cigarettes and talked about the $500 they just lost at a casino.
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Old 03-05-2013, 10:49 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, NC, formerly NoVA and Phila
9,784 posts, read 15,861,656 times
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For a long time, I figured people were like me. I didn't realize how privileged I was to have my parents pay for college or hand out money for extras, etc. I knew not everyone was like that, but I thought most people I came in contact were like me.

Then after I started working, I thought everyone saved money like I did. I had no idea that people I hung out ran up credit card debt or weren't contributing to their 401(k).

Even when I got married, I always assumed that people were in the same position we were. The friends we hung out with were college educated, had jobs, lived in nice houses, etc. I assumed that they were doing relatively well. Then I would get comments, like, "Can I pay you on Monday after I get paid?" Or "I cannot lay out the money today and wait for work to pay me back because I don't have the money to lay out." I would be shocked.

I don't know why I was so naive. In my house, my parents were good savers, and I didn't know any differently, so I thought most people were like that. Now I know.
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Old 03-05-2013, 11:24 PM
 
1,784 posts, read 3,468,376 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by michgc View Post
Even when I got married, I always assumed that people were in the same position we were. The friends we hung out with were college educated, had jobs, lived in nice houses, etc. I assumed that they were doing relatively well. Then I would get comments, like, "Can I pay you on Monday after I get paid?" Or "I cannot lay out the money today and wait for work to pay me back because I don't have the money to lay out." I would be shocked.
Yikes - I assume this was for things that were under $500? I could see that happening if I had to fork over 4 grand to someone, but I figure that's not what you were talking about.
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Old 03-06-2013, 12:01 AM
 
15,654 posts, read 26,378,382 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Danes View Post
I was in my office doing online banking and a gentleman that works for me came into my office. I told him to not come behind my desk because I had my banking/financial info on the screen on my laptop.

He said: "I don't care about that, you probably have nothing, just like me".

I do know this guy lives in Section 8 housing but for him to assume my situation is like his is kind of absurd.

Some of us DO save, invest and always have imcome streams flowing. Not all of us are "poor".


Is this normal for people to assume your situation is like theirs, especially if the person is lacking in financial reserves?
Yes. When I worked at the bank, I was the only teller that owned my own home, and drove a paid for car, and didn't work to just keep up with the bills. I was no different then they were, except I made savings a priority.

And yes -- I was married but so were other tellers .. and hubby was in a pretty dead end job making not a lot either.

People asked how we could afford whatever and I said we saved for it. In one ear and out the other.

The day I might have changed someone's mind was the day hubs called to tell me he was being laid off. I sat down with pen and paper and wrote down our budget and decided what to cut. I went to my boss and asked about going full time. She didn't have space, but she went upstairs and asked about me putting some time up there. I could work upstairs, they needed me.

There was some major back and forth phone calls with hubby, and by the end of the day, I had figured out we would get through this just fine AND I knew how much unemployment he would qualify for.

And we'd still be able to save money.

A co-worker came to me and asked if I was okay, and I explained that the day was tough but the lay off budget was set, with some cuts in place and we'd be fine. And I was much better than I was that morning. She was amazed that through the day I worked on that AND handled customers fine. And that when her husband got laid off, they kept spending like normal and now were digging out of 10K in debt.

Until she saw me do it -- it never occurred to her to BUDGET. I think she might have learned something... but then again, who knows?
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Old 03-06-2013, 05:54 AM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, NC, formerly NoVA and Phila
9,784 posts, read 15,861,656 times
Reputation: 10912
Quote:
Originally Posted by snowdenscold View Post
Yikes - I assume this was for things that were under $500? I could see that happening if I had to fork over 4 grand to someone, but I figure that's not what you were talking about.
No, they were for small amounts. Two come to mind - once for about $30 in dues for a club I was heading up. Once was for about $50. Person didn't have the money to lay out to buy something and have the club pay her back. I was shocked both times.
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Old 03-06-2013, 08:58 AM
 
2,135 posts, read 4,284,989 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mamom1 View Post
IDK, to me it sounded like a joke. It didn't sound like he was making assumptions, just a joke.
Same here. Your getting all bent out of shape over nothing. Hell if he said that I would respond "sure I'm broke too". It doesn't matter really.
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Old 03-06-2013, 09:04 AM
 
Location: NJ
31,771 posts, read 40,897,404 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by packer43064 View Post
Same here. Your getting all bent out of shape over nothing. Hell if he said that I would respond "sure I'm broke too". It doesn't matter really.
i definitely prefer people believe i am broke. so i would have said something along the lines of what i always say to my wife. i always hold my two index fingers in front of me point towards each other but apart by a few inches and i say "these are ends and they are not meeting."
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Old 03-06-2013, 10:23 AM
 
917 posts, read 2,010,259 times
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How presumptous. I can't believe he had the gall to say that. wow.

On the flip side, I think it's better for people to think you dont have nothing than for them to think you do cause then everybody wants a handout.
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