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certainly lacking in boundaries u told him not to come behind your desk.
He may have been lacking in boundaries, but at the same time, the OP should not be doing online banking at work if he doesn't want people to know his business.
To answer the OP's question...most people assume other people's situations are the same as theirs. It's human nature. Most people have a limited frame of reference and they project that frame of reference out onto the world at large without even knowing it.
Then after I started working, I thought everyone saved money like I did. I had no idea that people I hung out ran up credit card debt or weren't contributing to their 401(k).
I don't know why I was so naive. In my house, my parents were good savers, and I didn't know any differently, so I thought most people were like that. Now I know.
I was the same way. My parents were also motivated savers. I just assumed everyone was like them. How wrong I was
It's almost like you have to lie and pretend you're in the same situation so you don't look bougie.
I dont think you have to lie and pretend, but it's jst not very classy to flaunt your financial staus. I want to see people and be seen by others as a person not according to my financial status. Just because you have money, you don't have the right to look down your nose at someone else. In the same way, if you don't have money, you have just as much value as the person who does.
Honestly, I would have been insulted if my boss said to me what you said to your employee. The right way to keep the person on the other side of the desk would be to gesture to a chair on that other side (assuming you have one) and say "have a seat and tell me what's on your mind" or something similar. Saying basically "hey, nosy, mind your own business", when the employee probably had no intention of looking at your screen, or coming around your desk, and no interest in whatever you were doing, is incredibly rude. Unless the employee had a history of being nosy, or asking what you are doing, in which case, some constructive instruction would be in order, rather than a rude comment.
i definitely prefer people believe i am broke. so i would have said something along the lines of what i always say to my wife. i always hold my two index fingers in front of me point towards each other but apart by a few inches and i say "these are ends and they are not meeting."
I agree, but you said it first. It is better to have people think you are broke and not lay all your cards on the table. The saying "everyone wants your money" is very true.
You are taking what he said way too serioulsy! You acted a little sensitive. He tried to say something to put you at ease, and you still freaked out!
I agree too that this was just an off the cuff remark that this person really didn't think that much about when they said it and really neither should the OP. People that say these things honestly feel better if others are in the same spot and want to think this, but the comment doesn't really mean that much.
It's not about that as much as it's about not wanting people to hit you up for money that won't be paid back if you 'lend' it to them.
Yep. Learned this the hard way.
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