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Dh works really long hours to eek out barely a $50k salary, in a labor intensive position. He is tired, frustrated and just overall miserable. I get that he is tired and working 12-16 hour days, every day is not reasonable longterm. This is not sustainable to his quality of life. His body is breaking down.
The dilemma is we are barely surviving with the overtime. I was trying to politely explain that we still need the income. We just need a smarter, less labor intensive way to earn an income. He takes it as a dig that he is not good enough for me. I would love to tell him to stop working so much, but frugalness only stretches so far. We already drive 10 year old cars, wear cheap clothes, buy all generics, have no cable or cell phones, shop insurance, use coupons, etc. I stress daily on how to manage our finances to maximize the money and still keep peace in our relationship.
I am at a loss how to increase income for either of us. I struggle to earn a $35k year salary. I am terrible at school and have tried several times to go to college, without success. I would happily grab another job, but with two kids and running a house, someone has to be there for the kids. Also more money for daycare, to allow me the freedom to get a part time job, negates the value of the job. Yes, $85k is struggling in a hcol area.
What do we need to do to increase income? Working long hours is not a longterm solution. Neither of us have high income careers with transferable, marketable skills. We have a household income of half of what our friends make and they have no idea how we are managing. I suppose we are really not managing. We have not been saving money for retirement and our future and all our income is going to basic necessities. We don't have fun. We don't have toys. We don't go on vacations. We don't have a latte factor. We don't even have a nice house.
Please do not suggest we move. I am very close to my friends and family and could never live far away. Moving would be detrimental to my well being.
discounting moving somewhere cheaper i think you answered your own question . without skills or ideas the only thing left is longer hours and more jobs.
you are living in an area that exceeds your ability to handle it on your income. there is no magic here. earn more or spend less are your options.
Dh works really long hours to eek out barely a $50k salary, in a labor intensive position.
The dilemma is we are barely surviving with the overtime.
That's about right.
In most communities $50,000 is about the minimum for two adults to maintain.
Quote:
We just need a smarter, less labor intensive way to earn an income.
Yeah, you do.
Quote:
I am at a loss how to increase income for either of us.
Whatever it is he does now... get into supervising that.
Go to the Community College and get a certification doing *something*.
YOU go out and get some sort of job.
There is no supervising in what he does now, unless he starts his own company. We do not have the funds to do so. He is already the top employee under the owner.
I have a job, but I am trying to find a higher paying one.
Please do not suggest we move. I am very close to my friends and family and could never live far away. Moving would be detrimental to my well being.
I'm sorry you dont want to accept the answer (the other being, what you also mentioned.... Increase the income.)
I know people raising 4 kids on a fraction of what you have.
But it sounds like you'd rather work your husband to death than have to visit friends and family!
I'm sorry you dont want to accept the answer (the other being, what you also mentioned.... Increase the income.)
I know people raising 4 kids on a fraction of what you have.
But it sounds like you'd rather work your husband to death than have to visit friends and family!
Dh works really long hours to eek out barely a $50k salary, in a labor intensive position. He is tired, frustrated and just overall miserable. I get that he is tired and working 12-16 hour days, every day is not reasonable longterm. This is not sustainable to his quality of life. His body is breaking down.
What do we need to do to increase income? Working long hours is not a longterm solution. Neither of us have high income careers with transferable, marketable skills. We have a household income of half of what our friends make and they have no idea how we are managing. I suppose we are really not managing. We have not been saving money for retirement and our future and all our income is going to basic necessities. We don't have fun. We don't have toys. We don't go on vacations. We don't have a latte factor. We don't even have a nice house.
I wouldn't suggest moving. You haven't mentioned if you are renting or making mortgage payments nor if you have any debts. I assume you are renting and don't have any debts except for household monthly bills.
My suggestion:
1. Try to generate small income - like going to garage sales and hawking the items on eBay.
2. If you quit your job and start a daycare - can you make more than 35K considering your friends are making more they may afford to pay for daycare?
Also, 85K is a decent income which keeps your head above the water for a family of four and you are right it doesn't really help you save for future. What we can do is if you list out your monthly income and expenses, we can suggest where you may find savings, if any.
I'm sorry you dont want to accept the answer (the other being, what you also mentioned.... Increase the income.)
I know people raising 4 kids on a fraction of what you have.
But it sounds like you'd rather work your husband to death than have to visit friends and family!
We are in a hcol area. $85k does not stretch far when housing is a small fortune (over 50% of our net income). Daycare consumes at least another 10 percent. Cutting little things is not helping the big picture. We get a manageable budget and expenses go up else where, like our health insurance went up in cost this year. Our income has been stagnant for the last 3-4 years.
It is not true that i am wanting to work him to death. I am fine with him working less but our wants and dreams are going to have to become much less. We are going to have to cut his hobbies (I don't have any) and slash our budget more. He is going to have to cut back his spending in order to make ends meet at our base incomes, without overtime. I already pack lunches, don't buy cigarettes, or anything else really. Diapers, but only until our baby is potty trained.
I want to be comfortable without having anxiety about money every time I have to buy groceries, diapers or gas. Forget about anything fun. Surely this is not living, I just want to be comfortable.
I wouldn't suggest moving. You haven't mentioned if you are renting or making mortgage payments nor if you have any debts. I assume you are renting and don't have any debts except for household monthly bills.
My suggestion:
1. Try to generate small income - like going to garage sales and hawking the items on eBay.
2. If you quit your job and start a daycare - can you make more than 35K considering your friends are making more they may afford to pay for daycare?
Also, 85K is a decent income which keeps your head above the water for a family of four and you are right it doesn't really help you save for future. What we can do is if you list out your monthly income and expenses, we can suggest where you may find savings, if any.
We have a mortgage on a condo. Our house is very small and not conducive for doing a daycare.
I have tried selling stuff on Ebay but was not having great success covering the expenses and still making a profit.
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