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You are probably ok with the inheritance you did not commingle so do not do that any more.
Try to hire a financial planner. That person might tell him he can not afford to help his sister. Seems like you will not be able too.
In general any money he gives his sister has to be considered a gift and from this post she will be dependent on him the rest of his life.
Only hire one with the designations of RIA. Then check to make sure. Oh the others will tell you that but they aren't nor do they have to by law.
These are the only financial people who have to act in your best interest BY LAW.
You know the saying "You got to pick which hill you want to die on" THIS is that hill. You put that money anywhere you want. It is your money. If he doesn't like it, too bad. And if he makes a big deal out of it hold your ground, suggest counseling. But don't allow yourself to be bullied into giving away money that is yours.
SO agree with this.
He's the one who needs his head shrinked, who does this to his own family with kids>
Talk to an attorney. It is possible that even if you co-mingled part of the inheritance money, perhaps an insurance policy or saving account Payable On Death, you can still keep the rest (such as the proceeds from the sale of the house) separate.
I have a long time friend whose parents left something like $200,000 to each adult child. Her siblings immediately put their inheritances into various type of retirement funds but she co-mingled the funds into her & her husband's joint saving accounts/money markets/CDs/whatever thinking that it would greatly benefit her entire family. Unfortunately, a few years later her husband's business started to have problems , so he "borrowed" from their savings. Later, he "borrowed" some more. Then they needed a new car, a new furnace, and other things and before she know it most of the money was gone.
It is now about 25 years later. My friend & her husband are really, really struggling financially in their retirement but according to my friend, her siblings are "sitting pretty" and really enjoying their retirements, to a large part because of the money that they did not comingle and greatly increased in value over the years.
My friend said that she can't believe that she did that and told her friends that it was the most stupid thing that she ever did in her entire life.
OP, please reread my post and the posts from other knowledgeable CD friends.
IMHO, any spouse who would get angry because their loved one will not "share her inheritance from her parents" is already planning ways to take the money away from her and spend on himself. Is this what you parents would want to happen to the money that the saved over their lifetimes?
OP, if you really, really want to share the money, tell hubby that when you both are retired, you will be able to take wonderful vacations together because you will still have the money that your parents scrimped and saved available to spend.
Although it should go without saying, WHEN you put YOUR inheritance money into a separate fund in YOUR NAME ONLY, do NOT get lazy and share the password...you just gave away your audit trail. Ask me how I know.
That's a good idea. I will tell my husband that we need to put a larger amount into my retirement fund.
Also, my husband has decided to give any share of inheritance when his Dad passes away, to his sister. He said he "doesn't want to fight with her" so he will just give it to her. I suspect that this is either 1) the truth or 2) he wants to hide any inheritance he receives from me. His sister is also a very smart woman, very crafty and intelligent. She has no interpersonal relationships with other people, though, except for her father. Her husband left and her two adult children don't speak to her anymore. She started dating a man after her divorce, and wanted him to write her into his will, even though they weren't even engaged at that point in time. When he refused to put her in his will, she broke it off with him. She also despises me and probably wishes I would die, so she could more easily manipulate my husband to get what she wants.
Quote:
Originally Posted by tassity22
If I put the inheritance money in a separate account, that is going to start a big issue. He will know why.
I still may do it, but it's going to be obvious to him why I'm doing that.
You have every right to do what you want with your inheritance. He wants to start a big issue?? You already said that your husband is going to give his inheritance share to his sister. He can do what he wants with his inheritance and expects you to share yours with him and you are okay with that?
You need to start thinking about protecting that money because your husband can't be trusted with it. Please don't let your husband bully you into letting him have access to your inheritance.
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