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I think we spent 6k on our wedding 18 years ago . it was family only and only the best of friends and we did a brunch . we just are not in to the whole big party thing
A relative is planning her wedding. It is going to be a big event where they invite well over 100 of their closest and personal friends and about 50 relatives. Expected cost will be about $30,000. When I told her that spending that much money for a one-day event, she directed me to the Internet and showed me that $30,000 is about average. See link below for information on the average wedding cost in 2018.
(Yes, I know you spent way less than that and so did I, but that is not important to relatives.)
She has the $30,000 sitting in a savings account today ready to spend on the wedding.
I told her that assuming a stock market investment doubled every seven years, if they took that $30K and put it in the stock market instead, that nice wedding may be worth $500,000 in thirty years. That would allow them to retire at age 55 and live a life of leisure for the next 30 years. She told me I was crazy.
(If you would have invested $30,000 in a total stock market fund in January 1988, it would be worth $632,089 today- 30 years later. Future returns could be more or less, who knows.)
$30K for a day of utter bliss and memories that last a lifetime or about $500k 30 years from now?
I commend you for your effort to enlighten the ignorant. Sometimes no matter how hard we try we just can't fix...stupid!!!
Only if you’re arrogant enough to assume to know people’s circumstances or what they value.
If you are middle class, young, and just starting out in life, and have no house and limited savings...
then yeah, I'm arrogant enough to tell them not to **** away $30,000 on a single day. You bet I am.
None of my friends have spent even close to that on a wedding. I thought they all had nice weddings lol I want to go to a 30k wedding now.
Anyway, I wouldn't spend that much unless I was really rich and 30k wasn't really much. If that's what they want, as long as they aren't getting into crazy debt over it, whatever.
I had been planning on a $10k wedding, but eloped (with someone else) instead. We did a little religious ceremony on a Mexican beach 3 years later, but since my husband is Mexican and we would go for the holidays anyway, this extra little event didn't cost even $1k, including my dress. We didn't realize it at the time, but this has sort of become a theme to our lives together.. just being very frugal and understated and practical. At the time we were putting our money into my husband's education. These days we put our money into the market or real estate.
I think the fact that this woman already has the money in an account speaks very well of her. Many people go into debt for weddings and honeymoons. It's not the way I do things, but if she's got the money she should do with it as she pleases. It's her big day, not yours.
I think the fact that this woman already has the money in an account speaks very well of her. Many people go into debt for weddings and honeymoons. It's not the way I do things, but if she's got the money she should do with it as she pleases. It's her big day, not yours.
Pretty good point to make. She saved the money and isn't going into debt for it. She can spend the money on what ever she wants.
I personally wouldn't want to do it (and didn't) but one could argue that my buying a Shelby GT350 isn't the smartest move either and I should have invested the money instead.
One of my best friends spent about this on the wedding.
Personally, I've never been much for "single day ceremony" things. I'd prefer either something tangible - a downpayment on a house - or an experience.
I would consider a wedding to be an experience... ours certainly was. It was only a single day, but I don't think we'll ever have as many people we care about all in one place ever again. We spent a not insignificant sum (our own savings) to make sure everyone had a great time, and I don't regret a single penny.
I don't suggest people go into debt but if you can afford to do it , do it. Wedding gifts tend to run 150-200 a couple today when they go to a wedding in these parts so the kids make back a part .
As a couple my wife and I would never give less than 150 if we attend someone's wedding regardless of the relationship unless it was like a house wedding . We would not attend if we had to give less , we would just send a small gift and not go .
I really don't like the notion of the size of the gift being a function of "plate cost" even though I know it's very common. My gift to the couple is a function of my closeness to them and may be increased above the average if they're young and struggling (as opposed to well-established in careers, own a house, etc.). If the reception is a BBQ in the parents' back yard, that doesn't change my gift amount. When DH and I got married, many of the people weren't as well off as we were- not that we were rolling in dough but we each owned a house and had no debt other than our mortgages and had well-paying jobs. Why should older church members on fixed incomes or young couples with student loans give us $150-$200? We specified "no gifts". Same with a lovely couple from my church, both widowed, who married earlier this month. He's part of a successful family business, she had a good career with the IRS (don't know what her late husband did) and her engagement ring was blinding. They also requested no gifts.
My feeling is that you do the wedding you can afford and don't expect the guests to "pay it back".
I would like actual statistical proof that the "average" wedding is 30K. Not just some article that says that's what it is, as basically just a guess. Nobody I know spends 30K on their wedding, with the exception of someone I know who can actually afford it.
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