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If I can give something like helping them to move their heavy bags or to help them to stand up - I do agree. But money - I can't afford it, because if I give them often, I'll become one of them.
But they want meth, not toothpaste. I say let them have it. I'm conflicted about it, but ultimately I say people should have the right to enjoyably self-destruct.
Not me, but I've worked with a lot of meth addicts in healthcare. There is a user mentality that goes beyond drugs and to people. It can destroy a conscience so totally and quickly that they leave multiple psychological casualties in their wake (ie. abandoned and/or abused children, fragmented relationships, crimes of varying depravity). I have seen it repeatedly, bad choices are made in order to support the habit. Yet the person without the drug may be capable of an entirely different life. So in supporting the habit, I take some blame for propagating the misery. That's how I see it. Even a food handout may be traded. There are social services in place for anyone needing help.
The homeless without drug habits, many with children, actually do want toothpaste, deodorant, combs, etc... They want to integrate into society and eventually get out of their situation. It is more rewarding to buy a pair of shoes that fit for a kid in a homeless camp than to waste money on a streetcorner user.
But they want meth, not toothpaste. I say let them have it. I'm conflicted about it, but ultimately I say people should have the right to enjoyably self-destruct.
I do live in an area with a lot of beggars/homeless/very poor people. I get solicited for handouts quite regularly.
And ultimately I agree with Matt. I have stuff/money to spare, usually. A couple of dollars I am going to spend on something stupid like Red Bull, or Peets coffee, or artisinal cheese. They don't. I'm not about to give a preachy or conditional gift, so if I have spare change I will often hand it over. If I don't, I won't.
I will not if the person yells, hectors, or starts with the obvious lies and scams about breaking down, needing diapers, needing bus fare or whatever. Be honest that you need a buck or two to buy a half pint or rock or some weed, and if I have it, it's yours. I was a smoker for decades, I get addiction.
It's not as if an addicted person is going to change their ways because *I* didn't give them a dollar.
Great thread. I ONLY give money when I see a VISIBLE disability which impedes one from working like if someone is blind etc. I'm often annoyed by my SO as he gives everyone who begs some $$$ & IMO if you are able bodied you sure can work.
If I don't see a visible disability, I MIGHT give food eg coffee & donuts but no $$$, last thing I want is to support a drug habit.
I always give. Sometimes it's only a dollar, sometimes five, sometimes twenty. It just depends on what I have at the time. I figure that the homeless man, woman, or child is by no means any different from me or anyone else. They all have their own story and circumstances. If they decide to buy alcohol or drugs with that money, it isn't for me to judge. Homelessness is painful, to say the least. Who can really say what I'd be tempted to drink or smoke in the same situation? And it would only take one or two strokes of bad luck for me and a lot of others to end up right beside them.
I am reminded of an experience I had a couple of years ago. I went to see a play at Cleveland State University. There was a homeless woman set up outside the theatre doors with shopping cart and donation bucket. My friends and I gave what we could and then went inside to find our seats. As the play started, she burst through the doors and dragged her shopping cart up onto the stage. It got dead quiet in that theatre, and stayed that way for an eternity. The woman dragged her cart to the center of the stage as the play began. It turned out that she was actually in the play, playing the part of God. At the end, when they introduced the cast, the woman revealed that she was actually an accomplished writer, lecturer, and professor.
But they want meth, not toothpaste. I say let them have it. I'm conflicted about it, but ultimately I say people should have the right to enjoyably self-destruct.
I agree with you. It's a gamble, really. There is always a chance that the person we suspect of being a drug/alcohol abuser will end up using the money we give them for something helpful and positive. If we give nothing, there's a 100 percent chance they won't.
On occasion I will give them a $20. I actually don't care what they use it for as I feel if you are living on the streets getting wasted is probably a nice escape. I used to live in Chicago, and on nights when it was really cold, I was always a bit more generous. I know that my $20 won't solve their problems, so I also donate to organizations that assist the homeless. I feel very fortunate in my own life and I like to pay it forward when I can.
I'm talking about giving to the homeless person standing holding a cardboard sign at the freeway exit ramp or the blind guy sitting next to the trash can at the subway station.
I just gave 5. to a young lady, seemingly muslim, and the look in her eye told me whatever was happening in her life, she was having a worse day than me. She was in the lotus position and not in your usuall panhandler areas around town.
However, panhandling is getting nasty in Calgary. One buddy just mentioned to me last week that panhandlers now EXPECT you to explain why you ARE NOT giving them money. We also have more than our share of crack/medicated/we're owed types here, and they're much more AGGRESIVE than Vancouver or Victoria, B.C. where my other experiences come from.
And as I said, it's morphing and getting worse.
I'm curious to see what everyone's personal philosophy is towards giving money to beggars. I'm not talking about volunteering at a soup kitchen or donating to a homeless advocacy organization here. I'm talking about giving to the homeless person standing holding a cardboard sign at the freeway exit ramp or the blind guy sitting next to the trash can at the subway station.
My personal philosophy is to only give to the disabled and sometimes the elderly depending on how frail they look. I used to give money to military veterans too, but after reading in the local paper about a frauds posing as Vietnam vets I stopped doing that. I absolutely do not give a cent to people who look like they have the physical and mental capacity to work. I can't tell you the number of times I've been asked for money by tall, muscular men who look more fit than I am. As far as what I give, usually it's about $2-$4, depending on what loose bills I have in my pocket as I never take out my wallet anywhere except to pay for something. I don't usually give change. It feels too demeaning to throw a few quarters into someone's cup, as if they were a water fountain or something like that. I don't give food, as that's usually not what they want. I could care less whether the person was going to spend that money on booze, drugs or prostitutes.
I ignore them.
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