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And this exactly what I see in the real world. What parent wants this for their daughter. It seems dating a black guy rarely ends well. Why does the media and marketers constantly push black males on us if the facts tell another story. So many non-black black women have bought the Kool-aid and then reality hits them in the face. It seems non black women have a higher out of wedlock birthrate than black women whose baby daddy is black. All you out there complaining that parents should give black men the benefit of the doubt are crazy. Based on these stats they should be concerned.
Why blame just the black man? usually people who procreate with those who are no good....are usually no good themselves.
If white people do not want you as a black man with their daughter, in their home, or in their family they have a RIGHT to feel that way. Why do black men feel ENTITLED to be in a place where they ultimately are not welcome?
The guy in the article was literally begging white people to accept him. This sad and pathetic black man was shucking and jiving so hard for white people to give their blessings for him to fornicate with their daughter. Its as if black men lose all sense of dignity and pride at the prospect of being allowed into the white man's world.
I am so tired of the REAL issue not being discussed and the same tired old scapegoats being trotted out as the "reason" that black men have to sit on the back porch of the white man's home and beg for scraps like a dog. The real issue is that so many black men are so jealous of white men. They want everything that white men have including their women even to the point of degrading themselves. I have never understood how/why black men hate white men so much yet LOVE their women. According to many black men, the white men is the devil but white women are angels on Earth. Its sick and twisted.
Wooooow...this post is filled with so much racism I don't even know where to begin. smh
Why blame just the black man? usually people who procreate with those who are no good....are usually no good themselves.
Thank you. Whatever happened to personal responsibility? What happened to not having premarital sex?It takes two to tango. Like the song from Rob Base and DJ EZ Rock, it takes two for this stuff to happen.
This is why I say race doesn't have anything to do with this. I admit there are many Black men who aren't any good. There are also Black men out there who are decent and hardworking, and won't do dumb crap like make babies and leave them. Here is the question though. Why are said women procreating with the lower caliber of Black men, rather than the higher caliber of Black men?
Here's my daughter. I think it's pretty clear that she's biracial - unless of course you apply the old school, racist "one drop rule."
And here's my son - once again, pretty obvious he's biracial. Of course, to some people, all they can see is "one drop and they're automatically black" - whatever that means.
These people are biracial - and love being biracial. It really doesn't matter to them - or to me - what category some weirdos try to shove them into. They have a firm grasp on their own identity.
Yeah I know - they're good looking kids. I wish I could take all the credit but I can only take half.
I'm full black and I am the same complexion as your daughter... I can't tell she is biracial from that pic honestly but she is beautiful.
Yep, because they're racially "mixed." DNA and genetics are fascinating. One of my daughters has three daughters and it's interesting to me that even though they are each 1/4 African American, one looks straight up Panamanian, one looks straight up African American, and one looks...well, multiracial.
I don't know your friends. All I know is that my kids tell me often that people generally are very curious about exactly what their racial heritage is and that for whatever reason, three of the four are usually immediately recognized as being biracial or multiracial, and one is occasionally. As I've stated several times now, they each have different coloring and features so they have had some interesting discussions with people over the years.
That's interesting. I think this might happen to a lot of brown people though. I'm full black but I've been asked if I'm half Asian often. Growing up my cousins used to make fun of me and said I looked like a blasian kid. I'm not even blasian, and yet I've had people ask me what I am. My sisters are both black Americans but people always ask them both if they are from Nigeria or kenya because they look "African" smh.
I'm not discounting your daughters stories or what you've said but only pointing out that while a lot of people can tell that someone is biracial, others cannot and if the biracial person looks black they might assume that she is black, even if she is not. I can tell when girls are biracial a lot of times but many times I've assumed some girls were black or a completely different ethnicity only to discover later on that they are biracial. It's a toss up, and this isn't only true for biracial girls but for black girls too. Some black girls look more biracial than the picture of your daughter you posted. Some are super super light with straight hair that waves up nicely when wet. Others are high yellow with light brown hair and hazel eyes. My friend has a black daughter that is high yellow with blue eyes and light brown kinky hair.
Growing up I used to think I could distinguish biracial children from black children but believe it or not as the biracial population has increased I'm noticing that there are many that look just like black children. Obama, J cole, etc. I'm not discounting that your girls are biracial because they are but what I'm saying is that just because they are biracial does not necessarily mean that they look "mixed"--some do, some do not, some look closer to white, some look like a completely different race... Your kids look like light skinned black based on those pics but they are biracial and that is fine. They are beautiful kids.
They have a lot of blacks so light and white looking that these blacks could pass for white.
My mom went to college in Louisiana and the colorism was rampant. There were was this guy that liked her but she was too brown for his family--it was important that they remain super light so they only married super light Creoles like themselves. In other words you would be surprised at the number of blacks that have two black parents that look more biracial and/or white than an actual biracial person.
Blacks are truly diverse-people constantly try to lump us altogether when physically we are probably one of the most diverse looking race in this country. Our hair is not all the same, our skin tones differ, our eye tones differ, our features differ.
It is not a negative thing for a biracial person to look black because blacks are extremely diverse looking. Even in my family, cousins and all, we are all different looking and range in hair, tone, etc.
Last edited by Faith2187; 08-12-2015 at 09:33 AM..
You're reading way too much into this (as usual - as you know, you and I have had this discussion several times in the past).
I don't think race "matters" when it comes to the value or character of a person. But ETHNICITY and heritage and culture does have a big effect on personal identity.
And as the mother and sister of biracial children and the grandmother of multiracial children, I am very attuned to issues of race. I pick up on subtle prejudices and attitudes that some might not even notice. This doesn't make me spring loaded or hypersensitive - it just makes me more aware than some people. I think that's OK. In fact, I think that's made me a better person.
And I don't generally sit around mulling any of this over, but since I find the topic of race and identity interesting, occasionally I will join in on a conversation on a forum. I mean, I also am very active on the Interior Decorating section of this forum, but that doesn't mean I ascribe all that much SERIOUSNESS to what colors are "in" this year or whether or not Danish Modern furniture was ever particularly attractive.
Like I said, you're reading too much into this. Again. I love the way my kids look, and as I've stated several times, all four of them are of differing skin tones and one of my daughters looks straight up African American, while one of my sons is sometimes mistaken for being Arabic. None of this ever offends me. Again, I will tell you that what WOULD offend me (if it happened) was if one of my own children began denying any part of their heritage, or became bitter toward either black or white people for some reason. What other people think or assume doesn't bother me as long as they're respectful to my family in general.
I have the normal pride of a normal mother when it comes to my kids - nothing more. You can relax. I don't base my opinions of your "superiority" or lack thereof on your skin tone or ethnic heritage either. It's not how I roll.
First of all, I doubt that anyone would ever refer to my children or grandchildren as "white." If they did for some weird reason, I'd probably burst into peals of laughter and correct them immediately. I enjoy sharing the ethnic diversity of my family with other people and I think the very ideas of a "one drop rule" or "passing" are antiquated, ridiculous, and frankly, sort of sad.
One more thing - since you and I have had this discussion several times, unless you have some sort of new insight or element of this topic to bring to the table, I probably won't respond to your accusations or suspicions again. The only reason I did so today is that it's been awhile since we discussed this and I thought I may as well refresh your memory about how I feel, since apparently you've forgotten.
Translation: Your kids are "different" because your contribution of European ancestry to their DNA makes them culturally "better" than those with two black parents.
You posted about your kids being insulted/upset/annoyed that they were referred to by people who don't know them as "black" or "colored" or "African American". This speaks volumes. From the pictures that you have posted they look "black" but obviously the idea that they can not distance themselves from their own blackness is disturbing to them. Because, again, if it really doesn't matter then who cares if people think that they "look" black?
And on another note, you can poo-poo all you want about the issues of the "one drop rule" and "passing" because you are an outsider looking in. These issues are a significant part of the African American experience regardless of how silly or antiquated. It is a part of OUR history. It affected OUR families. It impacted OUR culture. It is a part of OUR heritage. Again, having relations with or making babies with a black man does NOT make you an expert on African American history or culture.
Why blame just the black man? usually people who procreate with those who are no good....are usually no good themselves.
Well see that's what I believe too but if you consider the big picture-bm have the highest OOW rate no matter who they procreate with, across all classes and spectrums. many women of all races and backgrounds that procreate with them face the same outcome. Bm only make up 6% of the population so when you consider the high percentage of women that end up single moms after they sleep with them, it does seem problematic. Now I asked calipoppy if maybe all of these women just don't make good decisions when it comes to choosing bm, but the study indicates that the bm are of various socioeconomic levels, households, backgrounds etc.
I'm a single mom and I fully accept responsibility for the poor choice I made when I had a baby with a guy that I knew was not husband material. My dad told me when I told him I was pregnant that I was going to end up a single mother without a pot to **** in lmao, and I was engaged at the time. He knew early on that my ex was a problem. I chose a man that was very attractive and in the streets and when we met at 17 I was dumb and wanted to be rebellious and found that in him. I could probably write a novel about him and all the red flags that I noticed but it would be unfair because I had some of the same issues as him. Like attracts like. i left him when we were no longer alike-right after I had my son because I wised up. That being said I could rag all day on him as a mate and how horrible he was to me, but I have to accept responsibility in my decision to procreate with him in the first place. I get angry at myself more often than I do at the type of man he was toward me. But what I can say about him is that he is a very very good provider, he gives me enough money to not only take care of my son but to help with taking care of myself. He is involved in his son's life and loves him. Those are probably the only two positive things I can say about him as a man unfortunately but it's on me because I chose him.
I believe that a lot of women that have children OOw and become single moms obviously are not making the right choices with men. However I also think find it difficult to not jump to the conclusion that if a woman is more likely to become a single mom by being with a bm, we cannot completely rule out the possibility that there are some clear problems going on with BM-either there are a ton of bad apples or as a whole the men just don't respect marriage or family as much as other groups.
Getting that out the way though, I think one thing to keep in mind is that not all bm are bad, and that there are many good bm that take care of their families, and take care of their children.
Last edited by Faith2187; 08-12-2015 at 09:40 AM..
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