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Think of it this way, Many japanese believe that war is horror. If they cannot accept the fact that their then government was to blame, they will forever suffer from bitterness.
acceptance is the final destination of the grief journey. is it not? It is not about the "needs of my boyfriend's grandpa", although he was a darn brave ww2 veteran whom I truly respect.
That is one true warrior who doesn't blame culture, people, or paint all japanese with one broad brush. That is also one true warrior does not apologize or feels guilty. He has the attitude of all United States Marines.
it is more like "once you start the war, you accept the consequences of starting the war." If you started a war, you shouldn't complain if others torture you, or kill your families.
Probably not very pc for me to say, but, oh well, it is what it is.
Which war is not total war?
The ones the politicians start AND micro-manage control. Think Vietnam.