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Even today with all the rights women have, their huge unfair advantages in family court, and even if they commit a horrible crime their advantage of getting a slap on the wrist and not seen as responsible, many feminists/women like to make a big deal about how they are still "oppressed" in the western world. Do you honestly feel that you are being oppressed and kept from doing what you want due to men and the patriarchy as feminists would say?
Somewhat, yes. I pay the mommy penalty even though I have no children. I'm ignored because I'm female. I'm paid less because I'm female despite never having taken maternity leave. Etc.
I don't go FLAUNTING it. But I don't act infuriated by the attention I get. If a total stranger compliments me on how I look, I say "thank you", or "you're very kind". By the way, I'm in my late 50's and take meticulous attention of my figure, exercise 2 PLUS hours a day, and always wear makeup when leaving the house, and make sure my outfit is clean and attractive. Do feminists want us to let "nature take its course" and look like something the cat dragged in so we don't get "male attention"? Or is it the "unfortunate" looking ones who don't get any who are pitching fits?
Maybe working out and wearing makeup to look attractive is "anti-feminist". Who are you trying to look good for, if not for the opposite sex?
I have never seen a sane women infuriated by a sincere compliment.
There is a difference in staying fit/healthy and looking attractive as a person and wanting to be admired and put on a pedestal by the opposite sex. If the later is what floats you there is nothing wrong with that.
Yes I am more concerned at 58 about how far women have NOT come than I was when I was in my 20's. In my 20's -- in spite of being harassed in the work place constantly, I believed women were equals and for the most part working towards parity-- especially in the work place.
I see -- we haven't made great strides in wages and in advancement of women. Sure it is better than it was in the 50's and 60's -- great.....we are moving slowly forward.
Look at those in charge at The White House....the percentage of men vs. women in upper level of jobs is not reflective of the actual gender population.
Look at those CEO's --
Yes it is getting better but it is still has a way to go.
Look at Fox's policy of having women wear skirts and heels. They don't ask their men to wear tight fitting tops and pants to show their physique (thank God.) --
We may need some more time to "catch up", like minorities. It is happening, we should not force it.
I agree about Fox, all you see is legs. They would never hire a woman with cankles for on camera even if she was otherwise qualified.
I not saying I have really felt oppressed but your experience is different than mine growing up in the '60 and 70. At the JH level girls could play volleyball, no basketball. In high school girls played half court basketball. In JH career studies there were still women's jobs and men's jobs. Girls were pushed toward being teachers, nurses, secretaries. I remember choosing marine biology as my career goal in 8th grade. In HS (rural south) girls could NOT take shop or auto mechanics. Our choices were home economics and cosmetology and typing. Football players were permitted to cut in the lunch line, males were given larger portions of food, guys got excused absences for deer season. Freshmen boys were allowed to smoke but not freshman girls ( I know, I know).
I majored in wildlife and fisheries biology (almost marine biology). Got a job for an environmental consulting company. Although I had the same courses, grades and experience with fieldwork, women seldom got to go out and do collections. This slowly changed mostly IMO due to women in this field on the state and federal level and the old men finally retiring. Now about 50% of administrative positions and field crews are headed by women.
I was answering the question for myself, and we grew up in two very different time periods.
This is the point I was trying to make. Thank you for explaining better for me. LOL. I don't do drama, in fact I loathe it to an extreme. So the not taking everything so seriously is resonating.
BTW my OBGYN is a man and he is HOT! Can I say that?
Certainly! To me, you can, I'm not so sure about others. It's like walking through a mine field these days, you never know when you're going to step on one.
[quote=moneill;49508352]I'm 58 and I like to look good for me. I want to be healthy for me. I don't do it for my husband. He doesn't dress nice, shave, and work out for me. He does it for himself.
You are obviously more concerned what others think of how you look -- that's not a feminist issue...that's on you.
Feminist don't believe nature should take its course. Feminists believe you should feel comfortable in your own skin. You shouldn't feel that you need make up but if you like it -- wear it.
DH just chimed in his opinion: Most feminists NEED it.
I wish he'd join this forum. I'm tired of typing in his "chine in"s". He likes to read over my shoulder....
I don't go FLAUNTING it. But I don't act infuriated by the attention I get. If a total stranger compliments me on how I look, I say "thank you", or "you're very kind". By the way, I'm in my late 50's and take meticulous attention of my figure, exercise 2 PLUS hours a day, and always wear makeup when leaving the house, and make sure my outfit is clean and attractive. Do feminists want us to let "nature take its course" and look like something the cat dragged in so we don't get "male attention"? Or is it the "unfortunate" looking ones who don't get any who are pitching fits?
Maybe working out and wearing makeup to look attractive is "anti-feminist". Who are you trying to look good for, if not for the opposite sex?
Edit: For the most part, I mean the most desired opposite sex attention is by my husband of 36 years. He really appreciates my keeping myself looking good, and he always pulls out my chair and opens doors for me, helps me on with my coat, and lifts heavy things for me. And he foots the bill for my beauty salon appointments! What a sexist!
Hurt yourself with that stretch?
According to some here, I am a militant feminist. I also dress like a 50s housewife, command shock from my colleagues when they see me in slacks (and I live somewhere where it snows!), do my makeup and hair, and work out.
Choices. Feminism is about choices. I can do all of those things and still be just as good, if not generally better, than my male colleagues or grad school classmates in a technical field. I can do all that and demand respect when I'm speaking for the content of my words, whether it be in the board room, on stage in front of hundreds of oncologists, in my rep's office lobbying, or leading volunteer training at my local cancer center.
As for the bolded, I look good for me. I shave my legs because I prefer the way they feel. I wear the dresses I wear because it's much easier to pair a dress with a cardigan than slacks and a top. I wear makeup because it's fun. My boyfriend happens to like the way I look, but I wouldn't change my appearance if he didn't. I was me long before him. And guess what - he has his own style (one that I'm not a huge fan of) because it pleases HIM, not me!
I don't work out to invite comments about my tush from passers-by, interruptions to my workout, or so I can be followed home off the bus by men who think they are entitled to my attention (the first two happen regularly, the latter has happened twice and were very frightening). Earnest compliments from friends or other people I know are fine. Drive by comments about my body or appearance are not complimentary in any way.
Certainly! To me, you can, I'm not so sure about others. It's like walking through a mine field these days, you never know when you're going to step on one.
I was joking about asking if I can say that. LOL. The minefield is right though. When they start paying my bills and taxes, and raising my kids then "others" can have a say in what I think. Until then they are just people on the internet with their own opinions.
The observation isn't the problem, it is the evaluation of your work. For all he knew you could have been a driveway sealing expert but he just had to confirm you are doing it right. You got a nice pat on the head.
Hmmm. I really don't see it that way. Had he said something like, 'Why isn't your husband doing that?' instead - implying that I wasn't capable of doing the work - I might have felt differently. Which brings up a good point. Like so many other movements that have legitimate issues at their core, feminism lately seems to have succumbed somewhat to the screechers and the crazies who see misogyny around every corner. To be clear, I don't mean you or what you posted. I think we've all seen those people. In my view, this hurts those women who are facing very real discrimination.
I like being admired, treated like a lady, and put on a pedestal. I wouldn't want to be treated like a man.
It's about being treated equality . I'm at work to produce , not to be admired etc!
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To me, you can, I'm not so sure about others. It's like walking through a mine field these days, you never know when you're going to step on one.
I also dress like a 50s housewife, command shock from my colleagues when they see me in slacks (and I live somewhere where it snows!), do my makeup and hair, and work out. 
In my view, this hurts those women who are facing very real discrimination.