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I'm interested to see what people think of transgender people.
-How do you perceive someone that is "passable" vs. someone that's not passable?
For instance, PrincessJoules https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9BVPUzNaVQ vs. someone that has obvious masculine features but still wears female clothing and presents as female?
-How do you think transgender people decided to transition? In other words, do you think it's simply a matter of misalignment of the body and mind, a severe mental illness, or a conscious decision?
-Would you date a transgender person? What would be the deal breaker?
-More likely to date a "passable" transgender person or non passable?
-What thoughts would run through your head if you found out someone is transgender?
-When it comes to friendships, would you be friends with a transgender person?
-Would you be "embarrassed" to be seen with a transgender person, whether it's as friends or as a love interest?
-Are you likely to openly make negative remarks at a transgender person?
-Also, describe yourself a bit! What's your age, political views, and location? Urban, suburban, or rural? White collar worker or blue collar worker?
This is purely out of curiosity. My friend and I touched on the subject and it got me interested to see how open the world is.
I do not worry about passing or not. Some people look androgynous. Some people are male with feminine traits or vice versa. It can get confusing sorting out gender identity and sexual preferences.
I think reasons to transition vary, but misalignment seems like the right phrase. But the surgery and drugs are pricey, so it makes sense to not do that but still be trans.
As for dating a trans person? Not so sure about that. At the moment it seems pretty complicated to me.
I know someone, a lesbian, who was dating a woman. They got engaged and now her partner is in the process of becoming a man (surgery and hormones included). They are still planning the wedding. My brain is warped thinking about all of the complexities here.
I have a distant friend who is trans. I didn't know when we met. He is androgynous. I confirmed it when another mural friend mentioned knowing him when he was female. We've talked about it a bit, but not much. We did have an interesting discussion about bathroom logistics. An area I never thought much about.
Honestly, I don't know him well (he is friends with my sister) and we are still in the early friendship stages. I think the transitioning is fairly recent, as he also changed his name. He is also married to a woman. They no longer live in my city so I see them less often. Being trans had no bearing on our relationship.
In terms of close friendship with a trans person? I don't see that as an issue, I don't often meet trans people but there are some in my extended circles.
I have no reason to make negative remarks (based on being trans). Someone being trans has no impact on my life at all.
I'm in my late 30s, liberal and progressive. I live in an urban area - the Bay Area. And I work in a white collar job.
I'm a liberal yankee living in the Bible belt. I feel sympathy and empathy for transgender people because they are unhappy with their bodies and that can be so depressing. Imagine waking up hating yourself every day. I have no idea how much the surgery costs but obviously most folks can't afford it.
Sure I would date one, but I'd first want to know if they ever planned to get the surgery or not. However I would not date one living where I do, it would have to be in a larger city where people wouldn't stare as much.
Friendship with such a person is not a problem. What embarrasses me is flamboyance / attracting attention to yourself. I embarrass easily, I get self-conscious easily, and I have a social anxiety. So even my husband acting silly in public can embarrass me.
I'm a blue collar worker with a white collar mentality/upbringing. Mid-40s.
I don't hate them as indivuals or what they feel to be, everyone must live like they feel they are.
But my understanding of details is not enough when a man X feels is a woman, lives as a woman but does not make penis removing but starts a relationship with a man who stays a man and they think they are heteros and not gays.
Or this X changes into a woman and starts a relationship with a man who changed himself a woman too and they are happy lesbians now..
Freely do what ever and enjoy but sometimes I don't still understand where the point is. I don't know what I should imagine to feel to place myself in their situation and understand them better.
I have known several transgendered people. With one exception, they have all been mentally ill. Most noticeable, a personality disorder. Now I don't know every trans person on earth, so I can't say every trans person is mentally ill. Its just been my experience.
But what came first, the chicken or the egg?
Did they develop mental illness because they were so conflicted within themselves? Its a good possibility. It has got to be an incredibly difficult place to be in.
Or, does personality disorders contribute to the likelihood of being trans?
I don't know the answer.
The one exception was a trans child. They were 6 years old and transitioning already. But I witnessed some very disturbing dynamics in the family. The mother seemed to push the transition and punish the child if they acted like the gender they were born to. She also really enjoyed the attention of having a trans child and flaunted it quite a bit. The father seemed unconvinced but was terrified of the mother so he went along with everything she said. The mother was diagnosed Borderline PD.
So how do I feel about trans people? Kind of neutral. I would be fine being seen with a trans person. But I do avoid the trans people I have known in my life because they haven't been mentally healthy. I wouldn't automatically think trans people are mentally ill, but having that been my experience...Id be cautious.
I have known several transgendered people. With one exception, they have all been mentally ill. Most noticeable, a personality disorder. Now I don't know every trans person on earth, so I can't say every trans person is mentally ill. Its just been my experience.
But what came first, the chicken or the egg?
Did they develop mental illness because they were so conflicted within themselves? Its a good possibility. It has got to be an incredibly difficult place to be in.
Or, does personality disorders contribute to the likelihood of being trans?
I don't know the answer.
The one exception was a trans child. They were 6 years old and transitioning already. But I witnessed some very disturbing dynamics in the family. The mother seemed to push the transition and punish the child if they acted like the gender they were born to. She also really enjoyed the attention of having a trans child and flaunted it quite a bit. The father seemed unconvinced but was terrified of the mother so he went along with everything she said. The mother was diagnosed Borderline PD.
So how do I feel about trans people? Kind of neutral. I would be fine being seen with a trans person. But I do avoid the trans people I have known in my life because they haven't been mentally healthy. I wouldn't automatically think trans people are mentally ill, but having that been my experience...Id be cautious.
everyone is mentally ill to a degree so Id be careful of throwing stones if I were you
transgendered is not a mental illness!!!
its a hiccup of fetal development. Like my niece who was born without an arm.
I don't know that I would be interested in dating a trans person, but I do applaud their bravery in being their true selves in a society that doesn't really understand what they're going through.
everyone is mentally ill to a degree so Id be careful of throwing stones if I were you
transgendered is not a mental illness!!!
its a hiccup of fetal development. Like my niece who was born without an arm.
so she was physically impaired.
typically, if the illness stems from an issue in the brain, then we call it mental illness.
it might be politically incorrect to say, but the fact is we have a really good idea of what causes homosexuality and transgender thoughts. we also have a pretty decent understanding of how to "treat" it. however, for whatever reason, it has become politically incorrect to say or do these things.
i find it somewhat interesting that homosexuals and transgenders are treated one way yet pedophiles are treated completely different when there is strong evidence to show that none of them are a choice, but all of them are "treatable" in some way, shape, or form.
What are your thoughts on transgender people? I feel sad for them for struggling with their body.
-How do you perceive someone that is "passable" vs. someone that's not passable?
For instance, PrincessJoules https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9BVPUzNaVQ vs. someone that has obvious masculine features but still wears female clothing and presents as female? I think that there are many very pretty transgenders. However, I think they often overdo it with their gestures and the way they talk and it annoys me.
-How do you think transgender people decided to transition? In other words, do you think it's simply a matter of misalignment of the body and mind, a severe mental illness, or a conscious decision? Born in the wrong body.
-Would you date a transgender person? No. I gew up too conservatively. What would be the deal breaker? example: If I tell him something about my period and he knows what I am talking about.If I have an issue with a tight dress and he tells me he knows how that feels.
-More likely to date a "passable" transgender person or non passable? Neither.
-What thoughts would run through your head if you found out someone is transgender? I would be looking for male/female features on their body.
-When it comes to friendships, would you be friends with a transgender person? if they act normal, yes. I don't like overly girly women or overly manly guys. It just seems fake to me, no matter if transgender or not. I have gay friends but they act 'normal"
-Would you be "embarrassed" to be seen with a transgender person, whether it's as friends or as a love interest? no
-Are you likely to openly make negative remarks at a transgender person? no
-Also, describe yourself a bit! What's your age, political views, and location? Urban, suburban, or rural? White collar worker or blue collar worker?
female, 39, grew up in a tiny town in Germany. Office worker, used to party a lot but now think very conservatively. Met my first gay person when I was 20. My best friend (female) is gay and acts manly but doesn't overdo it. I used to hang out in gayclubs.
This is purely out of curiosity. My friend and I touched on the subject and it got me interested to see how open the world is.
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