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I LIVE for laughing. I truly feel sorry for people that don't get humor, or irony, or sarcasm, or whatever it is that makes you laugh. I really don't think I could survive without it.
Laughter and what it takes to make me laugh has changed a lot over time. Obviously as a small kid laughter was usually easy. The world was new and we were new in it. It cost us nothing to show we thought something was funny, and frankly, most things were.
Then we get "education". We start to care about our dignity and ranking it against other people's dignity. For better or worse. We start feeling heavy and serious. Someone once wrote that we walked with more weight on the earth. I know I went through college and post-college years sensing that only the intellectual, the witty, and the highly sarcastic was worth a laugh. We might become arrogant and self-righteous if we weren't careful or studied long enough. Dumb stupid things were only to be laughed at when no one else saw us succumb. Thank goodness that sanctimonious phase didn't last too long!
There have certainly been times when the old laugh muscles atrophied from lack of use. Nothing would ever be funny again. The world was headed into ruin and I was powerless to stop it. Work was too important to include humor. Something might break if we ever loosened up.
When I hear the comment about aging referring to a "second childhood" it makes me wonder all the different ways that is true. One may have to do with what we think is funny. The innocently silly, the casual blunders we share with every other human, the humility we hopefully never lost. The cost drops once again. And, because with age we now allow ourselves to unclutch our emotional pearls a tiny bit, get that stick out of our nether regions more and more often, the laughter is back for good.
I'll admit that one of my secret pleasures is that stupid tv program showing funny home videos. Much as I detest the MC of the various versions of this show, I thoroughly enjoy the pet antics, the trips over nothing, crotch shots, trampoline mishaps, practical jokes, motorcycle runaways, crab pinches, fake snake scares, all of it for an hour each Sunday evening. I have laughed so hard I hurt afterwards. Its a great little endorphin battery charge for the week ahead.
Last edited by Parnassia; 05-13-2019 at 01:33 AM..
Laughter and what it takes to make me laugh has changed a lot over time. Obviously as a small kid laughter was usually easy. The world was new and we were new in it. It cost us nothing to show we thought something was funny, and most things were.
Then we get "education". We start to care about our dignity and ranking it against other people's dignity. For better or worse. We get to feeling heavy and serious. I know I went through college and post-college years sensing that only the intellectual, the witty, and the highly sarcastic was worth a laugh. Dumb stupid things were only to be laughed at when no one else saw us succumb. Thank goodness that sanctimonious phase didn't last too long!
There have certainly been times when the old laugh muscles atrophied from lack of use. Nothing would ever be funny again. The world was headed into ruin and I was powerless to stop it. Work was too important to include humor. Something might break if we ever loosened up.
When I hear the aging comment about "second childhood" it makes me wonder all the different ways that is true. One may have to do with what we think is funny. The innocently silly, the casual blunders we share with every other human, the humility we hopefully never lost. And, because with age we now allow ourselves to unclutch our emotional pearls a tiny bit, get that stick out of our nether regions more and more often, the laughter is back for good.
I'll admit that one of my secret pleasures is that stupid tv program showing funny home videos. Much as I detest the MC of the various versions of this show, I thoroughly enjoy the pet antics, the trips over nothing, crotch shots, trampoline mishaps, practical jokes, motorcycle runaways, crab pinches, fake snake scares, all of it for an hour each Sunday evening. I have laughed so hard I hurt afterwards. Its a great little setup for the week ahead.
I swear, as soon as I started reading your post, even before the bolded part, I thought about my SO's sense of humor, and you went on to discuss basically what I was thinking.
He jokes that there must be something wrong with him, because whenever there's a scene of extreme clumsiness, weapons being fired off accidentally and totally out of control, basically any physical mishap that could afflict a person, he's all over it. Laughs seriously for so long that we have to pause the entertainment and wait for him to recover.
Someone recently posted this compilation of all these types of incidents/accidents. There was one that merely showed someone buying popcorn at the movie theater and then walking away and somehow losing their balance, I have no idea why, and they started that rushing forward movement and then their legs couldn't keep up with the speed, so they ended up spilling it (themselves AND the popcorn) all over the floor. My SO is STILL talking about it. You know, the fact that the person know it's coming and is frantically trying to compensate but their legs just can't keep up with the forward momentum.
I know exactly why he thinks it's so funny, and I agree, but he'll just crow with laughter while I have to wait till he calms down so we can move forward with whatever we're watching.
I swear, as soon as I started reading your post, even before the bolded part, I thought about my SO's sense of humor, and you went on to discuss basically what I was thinking.
He jokes that there must be something wrong with him, because whenever there's a scene of extreme clumsiness, weapons being fired off accidentally and totally out of control, basically any physical mishap that could afflict a person, he's all over it. Laughs seriously for so long that we have to pause the entertainment and wait for him to recover.
Someone recently posted this compilation of all these types of incidents/accidents. There was one that merely showed someone buying popcorn at the movie theater and then walking away and somehow losing their balance, I have no idea why, and they started that rushing forward movement and then their legs couldn't keep up with the speed, so they ended up spilling it (themselves AND the popcorn) all over the floor. My SO is STILL talking about it. You know, the fact that the person know it's coming and is frantically trying to compensate but their legs just can't keep up with the forward momentum.
I know exactly why he thinks it's so funny, and I agree, but he'll just crow with laughter while I have to wait till he calms down so we can move forward with whatever we're watching.
I think we laugh at it because we know in our guts..."there but for the grace of whatever go I." The great leveler. No one's immune.
"im not happy" has been a basis of many divorces and break ups... and its so vague its meaningless...but yet so meaningful its going to split a relationship..
so called "happy" is a moving target.....from all different factions of your life..
the older I get I believe the answer to this question is "how content are you with yourself"?
if you don't like yourself...if you have past demons that haunt you...if you have phobias and anxieties that limit you.... its not everyone elses fault or the worlds fault....fix yourself...drop the anchors and move out of the shadows and into the light.
believing in yourself....confidence in yourself is so more important than being "happy"
a flower blooms in the sunlight.....not in the dark.... see the sun...feel the warmth ...not wallow in the darkness.
Dang, mainebrokerman. You give as good advice about human growth as you do about good meat cuts! Heh.
Monty Python will deliver an extra shot of happiness for me. That irreverent nonsense humor just sort of puts all our concerns into perspective. Here are all these bright and reasonably nice-looking English gentlemen being serious about how foolish it all is
I agree, Parnassia, that there is something about aging that relaxes all that self-importance. And why not? By six or seven decades you've suffered nearly every indignity possible to any self-respecting human being, including having educated people with doctor's degrees looking up your bum with a periscope.
If anything was ever designed to loosen that heavy yoke of ego, that experience most certainly will. In your defenseless, flimsy, butt-less dressing gown, no matter how seriously you take your dignity, to these studied men of science you're just another a**hole.
I'm happy when I get to relax, because I'm usually being challenged. I don't enjoy being challenged at the time, but if I'm relaxing for months on end I get bored and stop being as happy.
“So, I’ve been thinking about this whole being happy thing, and I feel like people get lost when they think of happiness as a destination. We’re always thinking that someday we’ll be happy; we’ll get that car or that job or that person in our lives that will fix everything. But happiness is a mood, and it’s a condition, not a destination. It’s like being tired or hungry, it’s not permanent. It comes and goes, and that’s okay. And I feel like if people thought of it that way, they’d find happiness more often.”
– One Tree Hill –
I thought it was quite powerful. What I put in bold--I like to remember that. Today I am not happy--I don't think it is permeant, I think it will come back later.
For the most part, I'm mostly content with more than my fair share of happy moments to balance out my deep lows when they arrive.
Sure, I experience loneliness, depression, anxiety, and wish that a few things in my life had gone differently, but I'm also aware that I'm very fortunate to have a career that gives me a lot of satisfaction (even if its responsibilities can be overwhelming and draining at times), to have inherited good health and looks and high energy levels, to have been born to solid and loving parents and raised in a multigenerational neighborhood populated by some great role models for a child/young adult, and to have no debts outside of my mortgage. I might not have a huge number of friends, but those that I do have are of the life-long variety.
Having a M*A*S*H-like sense of humor (a family trait!) definitely helps as well. I'd rather laugh than cry. Having an irreverent sense of fun definitely is great on those "bad" days and weeks that we all have.
The most important thing for me that feeds my contentment when I'm having my good periods is the recognition that I've never lost my sense of wonder and curiosity and the desire to make things better for not only me, but for others as I can. As long as there new things to be discovered, new skills to learn (and old ones to be refined), books to read, and people who could use a friend, life is overall a positive for me.
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