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Since I had to help my best friend to cross the bridge and I am still devastated.
She was 14 years old, which is a good long life for a black lab/chow mix. We got her before we got married, before we had kids, before we bought our house, she was so tiny, she fit in the palm of our hands. She grew with us, through all of our life changes, good and bad, and was always there for us. Every morning, wagging her tail nudging me to take her for a walk, every night before I went to bed, that last walk of the day and a cookie.
Katie was a great dog, everybody loved her, but over the last year, especially over the last few months, her hips started getting bad, she lost a lot of weight, and you could see that the end was approaching. Like many other dog owners, and best friends, I didn't want to see it, I tried everything, homeopathic remedies for her leaking, doggy asprin and glucosamine for her arthritis, she was a real trooper. She never whined, never complained, just loved.
Last saturday, something changed inside her, she was having real trouble getting up from her bed, her tail, which was always up and wagging, was down and no matter how much love I gave her and how many cookies and other goodies I offered, it just would not go up. She laid around on the carpet and did not want to do anything, even go for a walk, and then the worst thing, she bit my 5 year-old son, for no apparent reason (there were witnesses, so I trust them....my initial thought was "what did he do", but he did nothing). I had her in a separate room for the rest of the day while I anguished over what to do, but knew in my heart what I had to do.
The next day, last sunday, I took her to the vet to see if there was any way to postpone the inevitable, but I knew, because she was having such a hard time getting up, I had to carry her up the stairs, because she would not go on her own. The vet examined her and said that she was in a lot of pain, which is probably why she lashed out, and that it was evident that she was in the beginnings of multiple system failures, and gave me my options. I held her face in my hands and said "go with the doctor and be a good girl, katie, I love you", and that was the end. I was so distraught that I could not go and hold her while the bet guided her to the other side. I did this alone, sent the family to the beach, and when they came home, my 9 year-old daughter screamed "where is katie?!?!?!?!?!"...that was not a fun moment, but we got through it.
The last week I have been trying so hard to focus on work and family, but there is a part of me that is missing, that is so empty that I feel it in my bones. This is the third time in my life that I have had to do this, and it never gets easier, but this one really hit home. I know that it will get easier, and that I will smile again soon, but its tough.
I want to get another dog soon, my family thinks that we should wait, but I am not trying to replace her, I just miss having a dog in the house so much, its really tough.
I have used this forum a few times for guidance in buying a house, looking at areas, and did not even know that this particular thread existed, but I wanted to get it all out of me, and I thank you for reading this, because it is really therapeutic for me. We have all loved and lost, and I know that I will get through it, but getting it out helps.
My condolences on the passing of Katie. You had a wonderful life together and right now your heart hurts as your loss. Just remember all of the good times that you had and that she is now out of pain and romping with all of our pets at the Bridge. You will know when the right time comes to get another dog. RIP Katie.
The decision you had to make was a loving last gesture, I think with kids in the house a good family meeting about a new dog is in order.
You gave her a great gift, the ending of pain.
God bless, been through this a couple of times.
Since Saber passed, He has shown/given me the feeling that space and time, and hence, closeness is different for animals.
Also, The connection has not diminished, just changed, as he and I are each experiencing a new "reality".
Not being in the same room with Katie, was Not the same as not being present for her and with her.
After 14 years of absolute love, Katie could not feel abandoned. Time and Space, distance is different). It's not possible. That you could not let that be your last memory is not hard to understand.
I'm amazed at how strong you could be. To choose to shield your family from this pain and guilt and bear the entire burden yourself, will one day soon, after the initial shock and grief have receded, be truly appreciated.
I'm so sorry you have once again joined this sad community, please come here as often as you need to, and ask for whatever support you need at the moment.
I believe Katie is now running the great fields of the sky, happy and healthy, with lots of new friends. My chow/lab mix, Alixe, was there to greet her as were all of my fur-babies who run there. <<hugs>>
Thanks guys, all of you, for your kind words and support....its been a week, guess I am less of a wreck than I was even yesterday. The family wants to wait a few months, so I will wait and just enjoy my friend's dogs for now (and the occasional dog I meet walking...... I know that I did the right thing, and preserved her dignity, which is a big deal for dogs, and I know that this will get easier in time. There are just so many things that I miss about having her here, little, sometimes stupid things, and in time, they will get easier as well. I looked at her photo album this morning and it helped, a lot.
Lenan and SouthernBelle, thank you for the kind words and thoughts, they are making an especially tough time that much easier. I am a 41 year old guy who is relatively tough (at least by my own standards), and this one really threw me for a loop. Hopefully, this week will be a better one.
When I look up at the sky, I know that she is somewhere looking back down at me wagging that slightly curly black lab/chow tail and waiting on the other side, ball in mouth, that funny look on her face, waiting for my hand to meet the top of her head and scritch her just the way that she loved it.
I have a 90+ pound GSD, male, he is 11.5 yrs old, he is starting to slow down, he is still my baby dog, we have one of his daughters, a tiny little girl, a mere 75 lbs, she is 6+ and very energetic. I know we will be losing Dreifus in a year or two, the thought is quite painful.
I'm new to the forums, but I wanted to extend my deepest sympathies. You absolutely did the right thing by her, but I know from my own experiences that knowing that doesn't really help the pain.
I think you're doing the right thing by waiting, even just a few months. When I lost my 'heart cat' when he was 14, I adopted a cat from a shelter within a few weeks. It definitely wasn't with any thought of 'replacing' him, but it was just too soon...I had a hard time bonding with the new cat for several years. Especially with the kids, it's a good idea to wait until everyone feels ready.
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