Enforcing "yes ma'am" in school

[Usedtobe VaNC]

Really? The Constitution?

Sounds to me like the teacher is saying "this is how things are done in my classroom"...Rules of the class: When we want to use something, we ask first the teacher for permission first When talking to me, you call me "Mrs. x" and say "yes, mam". Etc. etc. I don't think she is saying, if you don't use Ma'am, you will be expelled or get a bad grade. I recall in law school, our Dean always said told us that he didn't think anyone was "of good moral character" unless we said "good mawnin" to people in the morning. And as he was the one the State Bar asked to pronounce us of "good moral character", you can bet he was greated in the morning with a chorus of "good mawnin, Dean X". Of course, as others have noted, he had our respect first...so we were glad to comply. And, of course, he really wasn't keeping a record .

But I think a teacher is allowed to set her classroom standards for behavoir, as long as they aren't totally bizarre....which this isn't.

I spent the morning at my twins "character trait choral presentation". Sadly, the schools have to teach the kids how to have manners and character these days, since so many don't get it at home. E.g We have a number of parents who have their kids lie about where they live so they can go to school there.

[RDC11]

I can't believe this thread is STILL going strong.Yes,the school CAN enforce a dress code and most schools do.If ANY teacher asks to be addressed as a common salutation in the area,WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT?The kids will live and learn from it.

[nimchimpsky]

Originally Posted by meh_whatever

So... what do you do in a classroom? Suggest that "ma'am/sir" is an appropriate, polite way to greet your elders and HOPE that the kids will use it?

Please... like that would work.

Kids don't NOT call their 4th grade teacher "Ma'am" because they're rebelling.

They do it because they're used to walking around saying "Uh-huh... yeah..." to their peers all the time.

There's NO harm in enforcing this sort of rule to get it across to kids that an elder may like to be referred to as "sir" or "ma'am."

Nobody's expecting miracles with this method. It's just getting the idea out there... planting the seed, if you will.

Whether it actually sprouts is another matter entirely... and I don't think teachers have enough free time to be worried about all that.

I'm not opposed to enforcing ma'am/sir--particularly in the NC area where it's part of everyday speech. (In the North, in most social circles, it would come across as excessively authoritarian.) I'm just pointing out that it doesn't necessarily teach respect. It does teach one way of expressing respect, but I think it teaches social hierarchy more than anything else. After all, in this situation, isn't the main purpose of ma'am/sir to indicate the teacher is in charge? Not to say it's a bad thing--in fact it's a good thing because the teacher is in charge. I am just trying to pinpoint the real purpose of ma'am/sir in this scenario.

I also just want to make clear that ma'am/sir usage and respect are not one and the same. Ma'am/sir can denote respect, but generally that is only when it's a matter of choice. Respect can also be shown in other ways, and ma'am/sir can be used in neutral or disrespectful ways.

[Green Irish Eyes]

Whatever local focus this thread might have originally had seems to be long gone and, since it doesn't appear that anyone has anything new to add, I think it's time to pull the plug on the discussion.