Do you want to have kids? (marry, guy, jealous, friend)

[floridadreamer]

Just had one 8 months ago. And plan to have another...hopefully a little girl this time. Then I am done. Two hands, two kids. That's it for me.

[emjbulls]

I have two kids. Wanted two, got two, and we are definitely done having them. I am a firm believer in don't breed 'em if you can't feed 'em and two was the number we felt comfortable we could provide for without sacrificing our lifestyle while at the same time ensuring we could pay for their college.

I do not think it is selfish for people to not want kids. I think it would be more selfish to have them and not want them.

[awsun1980]

Originally Posted by canibeyou

Growing up, I always wanted kids. Three of 'em, actually. Had names picked out and everything.

While dating my husband (prior to getting married) we even talked about it. But getting older... we became more selfish. There are days when I have a migraine and I can barely take care of myself, much less a little one. And the more time we spend together where we can decided one night to hop in the car and go to Vegas for the weekend, or the beach, or......

Do I regret not having kids? No. I'm actually very happy with the choice we made. I'm a stay-at-home wife with no kids and the freedom to do whatever I want, when ever I want, all day long (including post-whoring myself out on City-Data forum ) is a lifestyle I love and cherish. And the time I get to spend with my husband is so precious to me that I'm actually happy I don't share him with anyone else. LOL.


What I don't like, however, are strangers who think it's their right to try and make me feel bad for not having kids (this includes the lady up the street from us who has 11). I've been told I have no business staying at home if I'm not raising young ones. Really? Where's the rule book on that one??? And I've been told I'm a waste because I don't have kids. No matter what anyone does in life, there will always be someone who feels it's their right to make you feel bad, I guess.http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y164/canibeyou/shrug.gif (broken link)

Well said, canibeyou,
That is a shame that you have a neighbor that feels they have to stick their nose in your business and private life. I agree with you--there's always going to be someone who doesn't 'approve' of one's way of life & as I've grown older, I've realized you can't care about what other people think! Gotta live your life the way you want to be truly happy.

[mrdude]

my fiancee and i are both childfree. we will never have kids. it's not that we hate/dislike kids; we just don't want any of our own.

[southernlady5464]

And plan to have another...hopefully a little girl this time. Then I am done. Two hands, two kids. That's it for me.

I hope Mother Nature doesn't surprise you with twins or triplets or something then. Cause you will run out of hands really quick. Liz

[acp2483]

As I am sitting in my office, at this moment there is a baby outside of my door with her mother. I closed my door just so I don't have to hear it cry and scream. I, seriously, don't think I could handle having a child. I love my dogs and they are the world to me, but when it comes to a baby it seems like they are soooooo annoying and aggravate the dickens out of you! lol Everyone in my family tells me it's completely different when it's your child. What if it isn't? What if my child is an unruly hellian? What if it's one of those stubborn kids who always want to say no? I was actually one of them! My parents were the best and always gave my brother and I firm discipline, but I continued to have a stubborn attitude and gave my parents hell. After knowing what kind of a child I was and the stories I've heard about my parents, I have never wanted kids. And for people to call that selfish and ridiculous is so uncalled for. As someone earlier said, the are the selfish ones. They put the rest of us through misery by bringing their crying baby on airplanes, behind our table in a restaurant, in the grocery store as they try to bribe their kid(s) to shut the hell up lol!! I could go on and on, but I'll spare you all! I simply believe there are people in this world who were not meant to procreate. And those who have chosen to produce offspring need to get their children in check! Although there is the exception with the occassional perfect child. But they're far and few between. Most of them live in Amish communities probably.

[big daryle]

acp, at least you realized you didnt have the temperment to have children. Unfortunately, millions of people didnt realize they did not have the temperment, resources, or both to have children and both the parents, and most importantly, the children suffer as a result.

[country pride]

I may have answered this one already but there are so many replies.
My days of having kids are OVER. Ive had 3 and raised 4, so Ive done my share of contributing to the human race.

[Reina Bella]

There is definitely nothing selfish or weird about you not wanting to have children.

I agree with the poster who wrote that it's selfish to have children when you're not 100% committed to being a parent. I see so many women who have children for the wrong reasons, and the only one that suffers is the child. Kudos to you for knowing what you want, and sticking to that! Not letting the pressures of society or of someone else force you to do something that you are not 100% committed to.

I have been married for over 5 years now and my husband and I don't have kids yet. He has been ready for them since day one, I wanted to wait. Now that we've done so many other things besides having kids, he is happy we waited. He is still ready though, just waiting on me. Being a parent is a commitment that will never end, and will undoubtedly be one of the most important ones I ever make. So I want to be 100% ready before I make that leap, and I'm totally ok with that. We do get the "Wow no kids yet?" question all the time with perhaps a raised eyebrow to go along with it, but I could care less. Those people won't be raising my baby, I will. So I'll commit to it when I'm personally ready, and not a moment sooner.

The majority of other married couples I have known have either had kids, or have wanted to have them. However, I have met several married couples that didn't plan on having kids ever, so they are out there. You will find a man who will believe in what you do and wants the same things, so hang in there for him! And good job on standing up for what you want. I know that can be tough sometimes!

[sierraAZ]

Originally Posted by acp2483

As I am sitting in my office, at this moment there is a baby outside of my door with her mother. I closed my door just so I don't have to hear it cry and scream. I, seriously, don't think I could handle having a child.

That I can absolutely relate to. I don't have kids, either. Might've felt differently had it happened at a better time in my life and the right way. It's hard to say now. At this time I can safely say I can't handle it.

I love my dogs and they are the world to me, but when it comes to a baby it seems like they are soooooo annoying and aggravate the dickens out of you!

Now, how barking, drooling, soiling everything dogs (or any other animals for that matter) can be considered less annoying and even more rewarding than children by many/most is totally beyond me! I know my opinion is hardly popular, but we're all here to give our 4 cents (inflation ). I know, I know about those who have kids AND animals... you're not factored in here, so dont' get defensive.