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But when you're in a relationship with someone, you should spend time with them and take them into consideration. "Oh, not feeling well? Well, then I'll just go to Disney/karaoke/the concert without you this weekend. If that's okay with you--or would you rather I stayed home?"
No one is saying otherwise. Why can't you understand that? Show me where ANYONE said that doing something without your SO means doing so when they aren't feeling well? Why are you making these ridiculous leaps and assumptions that simply aren't true?
No one is saying otherwise. Why can't you understand that? Show me where ANYONE said that doing something without your SO means doing so when they aren't feeling well? Why are you making these ridiculous leaps and assumptions that simply aren't true?
You're pursuing your own interests instead of remaining home and being miserable because your mate is feeling miserable. Everyone has been saying that you should go and pursue your own interests without your mate around. If he or she is home sick, and you're gallivanting about town, you're doing so.
I wouldn't recommend it, but other people seem to think it's perfectly fine.
Clingy is when you HAVE to be around them all the time instead of just WANTING to be around them all the time but being ok doing your own thing (like going to work, hanging with friends, etc).
Actually, if you take it to an extreme and demand to be with your SO every free moment of her time and yours, that is not normal. Any psychiatrist will tell you that. .
Errmmm...I work 16 days a month but get maybe 2 weekends off a month. And my wife works M-F. So, yeah...every bit of of FREE TIME we have, we do like to spend together.
I didn't get dogs so I could leave 'em in the backyard, and I didn't get me a wife so I could go do my own thing.
Errmmm...I work 16 days a month but get maybe 2 weekends off a month. And my wife works M-F. So, yeah...every bit of of FREE TIME we have, we do like to spend together.
I didn't get dogs so I could leave 'em in the backyard, and I didn't get me a wife so I could go do my own thing.
You have a lot of free time that's not 'our' free time. I think we all need our own time to do whatever we do (hobbies, volunteer work, etc).
You have a lot of free time that's not 'our' free time. I think we all need our own time to do whatever we do (hobbies, volunteer work, etc).
Yeah, maybe. I have always thought that our lack of time together has only served to enhance our relationship.
But I know couples who live together and work together. Drive to work together, eat all their meals together...and they seem to like it. My last relationship and this one were/are with people I really wouldn't mind being around all the time. It's not that I have to have them there. It's that I enjoy and don't mind them being there.
You're pursuing your own interests instead of remaining home and being miserable because your mate is feeling miserable. Everyone has been saying that you should go and pursue your own interests without your mate around. If he or she is home sick, and you're gallivanting about town, you're doing so.
I wouldn't recommend it, but other people seem to think it's perfectly fine.
I don't know where anybody said anything about gallivanting while their mate is sick. What most of us are saying is that he can go rollerblading with a friend while she goes to get her nails done, or she can go take a yoga class while he putters around in his workshop. It's okay to do things separately from time to time.
Yeah, maybe. I have always thought that our lack of time together has only served to enhance our relationship.
But I know couples who live together and work together. Drive to work together, eat all their meals together...and they seem to like it. My last relationship and this one were/are with people I really wouldn't mind being around all the time. It's not that I have to have them there. It's that I enjoy and don't mind them being there.
Sure, I agree. We're all different. For me, it's not so much about enjoying (or not) company with our SO's, but sharing every single interest 100% of the time. I'm sure some do, tho.
I'm one of those sorry-a$$ individuals who needs fairly large chunks of time for himself. As a result, most women usually see that as being aloof, a loner or "hard to read". It can be difficult finding a balanced match using the clingy/aloof model, so when one comes along I cherish it.
I tried to rep ya but... you know how that goes when you've rep'd too much LOL
This was well stated and I really related well to your need for larger chunks of "alone" time. My SO understands this about me. Every now and then when I see he's feeling like he's getting shafted, I'll put selfish me on the side and give him his attention but I do enjoy time alone... As stated before, balance, balance.
I'm not getting the fixation on the sick spouse angle. Usually when people are sick, they're going to be sleeping or watching tv in bed or otherwise resting. If the other spouse wants to go to their yoga class for an hour, what is the big deal?
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