Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Oops, OnihC, I think you may have overlooked the posts that disagree with you about how it "generally goes in the West."
Nope, "whoever initiates pays" means men pay. Come on, even women can agree that MEN, the majority of the time, are the ones who ask, take the initiative, etc. "Whoever initates pays = Men should pay".
Nope, "whoever initiates pays" means men pay. Come on, even women can agree that MEN, the majority of the time, are the ones who ask, take the initiative, etc. "Whoever initates pays = Men should pay".
Women can't win at all with you, can they? Even when they play fair, they're still devious and manipulative to you.
Nope, "whoever initiates pays" means men pay. Come on, even women can agree that MEN, the majority of the time, are the ones who ask, take the initiative, etc. "Whoever initates pays = Men should pay".
Nope. Whoever asks, pays. If men don't want to pay, then don't ask! If people don't like the results they get, they should try something else. Women who are sad because men don't ask them on dates ... should ask some men out. Men who don't like having to pay for dates ... should wait for women to ask them. Who knows, maybe they'll meet one another and live happily ever after.
If I invite you over to my house for dinner, I am not going to ask you to bring the wine and a hot appetizer--oh, and some dessert--and can you please come by an hour early and vaccuum and dust the dining room? That's because I am the host. Taking someone to dinner is no different.
Women can't win at all with you, can they? Even when they play fair, they're still devious and manipulative to you.
I just replied to your post on how women do expect/demand or prefer and enjoy men who pay for all kinds of reasons. Women GENERALLY expect/demand men to pay and I don't see it as something wrong or bad, just not my cup of tea. Nothing devious or manipulative about it. Seems to be the way to go in the west. Cultural differences I guess, so what. People have preferences.
Nope. Whoever asks, pays. If men don't want to pay, then don't ask! If people don't like the results they get, they should try something else. Women who are sad because men don't ask them on dates ... should ask some men out. Men who don't like having to pay for dates ... should wait for women to ask them. Who knows, maybe they'll meet one another and live happily ever after.
If I invite you over to my house for dinner, I am not going to ask you to bring the wine and a hot appetizer--oh, and some dessert--and can you please come by an hour early and vaccuum and dust the dining room? That's because I am the host. Taking someone to dinner is no different.
I am a female and my policy is never ask a guy on a first date. JMO women should not do it. That said, the men should pay that first date.
The reason is, men enjoy being men. I know if a guy asks a girl out, he will enjoy buying dinner for her.
Now after that my rules relax a little. But just a little. I held men to a higher standard.
That seems to be the way to go for most women CarolVa1977, nothing wrong with that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJulia
Nope. Whoever asks, pays.
And we know who does the MAJORITY of the asking, men. Can’t deny it.
Quote:
If men don't want to pay, then don't ask! If people don't like the results they get, they should try something else. Women who are sad because men don't ask them on dates ... should ask some men out
But they, generally, don’t. There have been 2 or 3 threads this week from women who like a guy and when I tell them to go ahead and ask them out, they just won’t for all kinds of reasons. Instead, these women rather play games, send signals, send secret messages, and so on.
Quote:
Men who don't like having to pay for dates ... should wait for women to ask them. Who knows, maybe they'll meet one another and live happily ever after.
Or they can go out with girls who regardless of being asked out, they won’t just sit there. Hey, even when an Asian girl asks me out I don’t just sit there expecting to be served with silver platters. I accepted her invitation because I want to be with her as much as she wants to be with me, so why act like an all-deserving king? Same thing when I am invited to her place because she is cooking something for me, out of courtesy, I’ll call on my way and ask if I should pick up dessert, drinks, or something. If she does, cool. If she doesn’t, cool. They do the same. After eating, I’ll pick up my plate and clean up. She’ll either accept or will not. Same thing when I prepare dinner for them. It’s all mutual. No initial stages either. Again, that is how it goes between me and them and that’s how I like it. I have my preference, western women have their preference. Nothing wrong with that. To each, their own.
Thanks, Matt, but I think several others are trying to say the same thing. I just don't see a reason to dismantle long-standing etiquette, i.e., what it means to host an event. Another example is a bride and groom who use their wedding as a fundraiser, getting angry with guests who do not give an expensive enough gift to "pay" for their meal at the reception.
The man or woman can do the asking. Several men--including onihC!--have said that they have been asked out by women. I have asked men out. People in this thread have mentioned taking turns treating the other. All of this is perfectly reasonable within the existing structure of hosting an event.
The man or woman can do the asking. Several men--including onihC!--have said that they have been asked out by women
Sure, I believe women CAN do the asking but many seem to prefer having men ask, take the initiative, and so on. Maybe later on after the weeks/months/years of initial stages they might consider asking their guy out. If it works for them fine. I have been asked by women when I lived in Asia or Asian women I meet in the west. Other than that, no. And I have no problem going out with western women either regardless of certain cultural differences. Everybody has their preferences.
Sure, I believe women CAN do the asking but many seem to prefer having men ask, take the initiative, and so on. Maybe later on after the weeks/months/years of initial stages they might consider asking their guy out. If it works for them fine. I have been asked by women when I lived in Asia or Asian women I meet in the west. Other than that, no. And I have no problem going out with western women either regardless of certain cultural differences. Everybody has their preferences.
Do you prefer to ask or to be asked?
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
