Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
The advise to "find yourself first, be confident, be secure" comes from the 40-50+ crowd, who have glimpsed some deep truths through experiences. Therefore, the poster who said it comes with time, is correct (and it is not helping the younger posters with their current problems - sadly). But the wise crowd was young once, too, similarly trying to find their legs, making attempts, falling in pain, asking Why me?, raising, making attempts again....
There are younger people with inborn charisma or confidence, but they may not understand the gift and either misuse it, or be perplexed, - they will get the true meaning of their gift with time, as well.
Those who have very busy lives from the young age (families, kids) and think they took the life by the horns and are invincible, still often experience the same identity questions, but later than others - when the kids are gone and they still are youngish - 40s, 50s.
No matter how you look at it, it's time and -ahem- baggage that wisen you up.
I can't answer this question for anyone else other than myself and my own experiences
I was plagued by low self esteem for many, many years which led me to make poor decisions in my life. Age has helped me immensely. Wisdom and life experience has changed me and allowed me to become much more confident in who I am as a person.
It's still an ongoing battle at times though. I have to mentally fight that demon and choose to be positive about myself.
There is a saying "Youth is wasted on the young" I understand what that means now.
I've had a debilitating lack of self confidence my whole life, everyone around me has always thought highly of me and my abilities, I just don't understand why I've struggled to see it myself.
It takes time and some self reflection, and a little more time.... I said that already didn't I???
What are your opinions on how does one go about gaining self worth.
Something happened today that made me want to bring this thread up involving a family member. But I can handle that so I'm not really looking for advice, just a discussion.
Enjoy life; do things that are interesting and experience as much of what the world has to offer.
I've been on these boards awhile now and one theme stands out above the rest, self confidence is everything.
Also the old question: "If you can't love yourself, who will?"
The question though is how, how does a person learn to love themselves?
How does a person gain self confidence?
What are your opinions on how does one go about gaining self worth.
Something happened today that made me want to bring this thread up involving a family member. But I can handle that so I'm not really looking for advice, just a discussion.
In everything you do, do your best. Give it your absolute best shot. That includes being a good and decent person. Try your hardest. Try things you've never tried before and learn new things.....always, again, giving it your absolute best. Know, at the end of the day, that you HAVE given your best, done your best, BEEN your best. Also know, that you are the only one who knows what your best is. When you know, beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are trying your hardest and doing your best, give yourself a pat on the back.
The least confident people I know are people who do everything half-ast, and never really stick with anything long enough to really get good at it. They never give it their all. They also compare themselves to others and allow themselves to get brought down by others' accomplishments and achievements. If you're only comparing you to yourself, how can you feel like you're not good enough?
If that fails...do as another poster suggested, say, "Self, c'mere and give me a big ole kiss!" Sorry....but I thought THAT was worth repeating!
YES! And people need to STOP comparing themselves to other people. Stop measuring yourself by others' accomplishments.
Personally, I have never felt the need to compete with others on anything I've undertaken.
That's because I am just too busy competing with myself.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Sorry....but I thought THAT was worth repeating! 
