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If the OP is questioning that this woman has "too many issues" then she probably does, for you that is. That little voice prompting the questions shouldn't be ignored.
Yowza, she definitely has a lot of issues but I would not necessarily eliminate her from your dating pool just based on them, especially if she has other qualities that you admire.
I'd definitely tread slowly, get to know her better and see whether these issues are anything that will get resolve over time (like kicking the smoking habit. I do know of several people who quit cold turkey after getting engaged/marriage and have never looked back). The herpes..ehh..thats a tough one. You will have to be extremely careful if you sleep with her and the fact that she was honest with you about this from the beginning is a plus in my book (she could have easily just lied to you about being STD-free).
The rest is up to you. Only you can decide how much of these "issues" you can tolerate. EVERYONE has issues - there is NO such thing as a perfect partner. The question you have to ask yourself is whether you can tolerate these issues or not.
If you feel these issues are "red" flags or "yellow flags signaling caution", I'd take that as an indication not to proceed.
They don't call it intuition for nothing.
2) Bulemic. She's liked it. No big deal. However, I think it's a good idea to notice her behavior to make sure this is really true.
3) Cosmetic Surgery. No big deal at all. But when you couple this with the bulimia, does this point to some major self-esteem issues? Are the two interrelated? Does this woman feel that she has to remake herself in order to feel better?
4) Herpes. That's a bigger deal, but it's not a sign of moral laxity. If you are a sexually active adult, you run this risk. And she was unlucky. You have to decide if you are ready to accept this in your life.
Yowza, she definitely has a lot of issues but I would not necessarily eliminate her from your dating pool just based on them, especially if she has other qualities that you admire.
I'd definitely tread slowly, get to know her better and see whether these issues are anything that will get resolve over time (like kicking the smoking habit. I do know of several people who quit cold turkey after getting engaged/marriage and have never looked back). The herpes..ehh..thats a tough one. You will have to be extremely careful if you sleep with her and the fact that she was honest with you about this from the beginning is a plus in my book (she could have easily just lied to you about being STD-free).
The rest is up to you. Only you can decide how much of these "issues" you can tolerate. EVERYONE has issues - there is NO such thing as a perfect partner. The question you have to ask yourself is whether you can tolerate these issues or not.
Yes, but do they have MULTIPLE issues? Dealing with one or two, okay, dealing with a myriad array on a daily/weekly basis is quite the feat.
Yes I know it's common, I work in a dr.'s office. Also not all the strains of it are cancer causing in women. But as I said, I don't have any STDs and I wouldn't want to sign up for those problems if I didn't have to.
I hear ya. I was just thinking that your average guy out there probably has HPV or did have HPV at some point since it's so common, so I wouldn't write someone off for that particular STD. Also, according to the CDC website, it seems like it's not that easy to test someone for it.
"The HPV tests on the market are only used to help screen women at certain ages and with certain Pap test findings, for cervical cancer. There is no general test for men or women to check one’s overall "HPV status," nor is there an approved HPV test to find HPV on the genitals or in the mouth or throat."
If she is cute and smart and fun to be with, yet she is still on the vine, then I see this as trouble. A lot of other men have already taken a pass, for whatever reason, and if I were you I would too.
If the OP is questioning that this woman has "too many issues" then she probably does, for you that is. That little voice prompting the questions shouldn't be ignored.
Yes, it sounds like she has quite a few issues, and the ea ting disorders and bulemia and frequent plastic surgeries indicate psychological issues, she's not finished with nicotine if she needs the patch, and herpes on top of that -- it does sound like a lot of baggage, but as others said it depends on how much baggage one can deal with.
Maybe date her a while more and see if the positives don't outweigh the negatives, but be prepared for her to go back to smoking, and have more eating disorders, plastic surgery for this and that, and catch herpes.
Yes, it sounds like she has quite a few issues, and the ea ting disorders and bulemia and frequent plastic surgeries indicate psychological issues, she's not finished with nicotine if she needs the patch, and herpes on top of that -- it does sound like a lot of baggage, but as others said it depends on how much baggage one can deal with.
Maybe date her a while more and see if the positives don't outweigh the negatives, but be prepared for her to go back to smoking, and have more eating disorders, plastic surgery for this and that, and catch herpes.
I'd be more concerned with the bulimia issue, only because it is a mental illness that is not easily conquered and the herpes. Plastic surgery, hey a number of people are vain, we all want to look good for our partners, some take it a little further than most by going under the "knife".
I hear ya. I was just thinking that your average guy out there probably has HPV or did have HPV at some point since it's so common, so I wouldn't write someone off for that particular STD.Also, according to the CDC website, it seems like it's not that easy to test someone for it.
"The HPV tests on the market are only used to help screen women at certain ages and with certain Pap test findings, for cervical cancer. There is no general test for men or women to check one’s overall "HPV status," nor is there an approved HPV test to find HPV on the genitals or in the mouth or throat."
There are a series of vaccines for it that can be given before the age of 21 for most folks but unfortunately most of the people are past that age by the time the even learn about it. That is why there's such a big push for teens to get the vaccine, but there's issue with that as well. I just think people in general are nonchalant about STDs because there's medication for them. for example, I read online where men were saying "Well, HIV isn't the death sentence it used to be because of all of the advancement in the medications for it." ...Okay. But who wants it regardless??
HPV is complicated but I refer back to what I said, just not something I'd be terribly interested in today. But who knows I didn't think I would be back then either.
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