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What people (usually men) don't seem to get is that the latter of those choices is on level with no choice at all. what's so hard to understand about that?
Quote:
Originally Posted by BradPiff
On the level?
Women certainly think so. Studies of their preferences indicate that they consider 80% of men to be below average. Of course, their initial decisions are usually based on looks and perceived wealth (translated into "confidence") so other factors are largely irrelevant.
In the years I've been on this site, the main thrust of my comments to women is that they are initially looking for the wrong things. They aim high for the wrong things and then when he turns out to be a dud, they say to themselves "If I'd aimed lower, one can only imagine how bad these guys must be!"
The fact is, there is often an inverse relationship between superficiality and solid values in men. Why? Men who can attract women based on the superficial attributes, don't have to work much at all on the other more important things. Their attitude is: "If she doesn't like it, there are plenty more where she came from!" Many women have been married to these guys for some time before it dawns on them that they will never change for the better.
The tragedy of relationships today is that there are so many decent men who are not only largely overlooked, but regularly put down by women, who hardly know them.
Crappy options(in your opinion) isn't the same as NO options. And that's the point of the thread.
When you dig deep Into the stories of people who say the 2 things I said in the OP you find out that Guys ARE approaching them or have approached them and that There ARE some girls that are interested in them. They just don't want them. And that's ok, but don't say No one wants you.
That's disingenuous
And let's be honest, a lot of the people being turned down(on BOTH sides) are in the same realm of attractiveness as the people that are rejecting them. I see a lot of Guys women turn down(who say NO GUY approaches me) that are basically on their same level.
Women certainly think so. Studies of their preferences indicate that they consider 80% of men to be below average. Of course, their initial decisions are usually based on looks and perceived wealth (translated into "confidence") so other factors are largely irrelevant.
In the years I've been on this site, the main thrust of my comments to women is that they are initially looking for the wrong things. They aim high for the wrong things and then when he turns out to be a dud, they say to themselves "If I'd aimed lower, one can only imagine how bad these guys must be!"
The fact is, there is often an inverse relationship between superficiality and solid values in men. Why? Men who can attract women based on the superficial attributes, don't have to work much at all on the other more important things. Their attitude is: "If she doesn't like it, there are plenty more where she came from!" Many women have been married to these guys for some time before it dawns on them that they will never change for the better.
The tragedy of relationships today is that there are so many decent men who are not only largely overlooked, but regularly put down by women, who hardly know them.
The same goes for women. Most really attractive women (aka, the ones the majority of men go after) don't have to develop any real social skills because they've always had everything provided to them on a silver platter. I've known faaaar too many pretty girls who have no idea what to do or how to act when they're given responsibility.
Perhaps if men went after the 'average' women things would change as well.
I guess I should just 'aim lower' and date the 60 year old biker that told me my 'boobs were made for putting faces in' last weekend.
Crappy options(in your opinion) isn't the same as NO options. And that's the point of the thread.
When you dig deep Into the stories of people who say the 2 things I said in the OP you find out that Guys ARE approaching them or have approached them and that There ARE some girls that are interested in them. They just don't want them. And that's ok, but don't say No one wants you.
That's disingenuous
I never said a man didn't approach me. I said it happened once, legitimately and recently. It also happened a few times in a bar when they were drunk and wanted anything that had a vagina, but again, not valid. it's really insulting anyways that you consider that an "option," and a reason for a woman to say: "Yay! somebody wants me!" Not really....The reasons WHY someone wants you are as important. But what else is new? Men just don't get it, they throw the baby out with the bath water, as they say. There's no point going over it.
Women certainly think so. Studies of their preferences indicate that they consider 80% of men to be below average. Of course, their initial decisions are usually based on looks and perceived wealth (translated into "confidence") so other factors are largely irrelevant.
In the years I've been on this site, the main thrust of my comments to women is that they are initially looking for the wrong things. They aim high for the wrong things and then when he turns out to be a dud, they say to themselves "If I'd aimed lower, one can only imagine how bad these guys must be!"
The fact is, there is often an inverse relationship between superficiality and solid values in men. Why? Men who can attract women based on the superficial attributes, don't have to work much at all on the other more important things. Their attitude is: "If she doesn't like it, there are plenty more where she came from!" Many women have been married to these guys for some time before it dawns on them that they will never change for the better.
The tragedy of relationships today is that there are so many decent men who are not only largely overlooked, but regularly put down by women, who hardly know them.
There's a lot of truth to this. Specifically the 80% Below Average thing
I never said a man didn't approach me. I said it happened once, legitimately and recently. It also happened a few times in a bar when they were drunk and wanted anything that had a vagina, but again, not valid. it's really insulting anyways that you consider that an "option," and a reason for a woman to say: "Yay! somebody wants me!" Not really....The reasons WHY someone wants you are as important. But what else is new? Men just don't get it, they throw the baby out with the bath water, as they say. There's no point going over it.
This is exactly it. The guys that come up and say lewd, disgusting things are NEVER going to be considered viable dating prospects. Ever. I don't count those as men approaching because 9 times out of 10 when I say no thank you, they immediately go to the next woman and try the same thing. These guys are just looking for a place to put their penis and nothing more.
Maybe some men consider that an 'option', but as a woman I consider it harassment.
This is exactly it. The guys that come up and say lewd, disgusting things are NEVER going to be considered viable dating prospects. Ever. I don't count those as men approaching because 9 times out of 10 when I say no thank you, they immediately go to the next woman and try the same thing. These guys are just looking for a place to put their penis and nothing more.
Maybe some men consider that an 'option', but as a woman I consider it harassment.
cannot rep this but on what planet is a guy saying lewd, rude things considered "oh at least he wants me." What's even more ironic is if you tell the men that claim they can't get laid to get a hooker because that's always an OPTION. what's first thing they say: "It's not the same thing because she doesn't want me for me, etc." Funny how that works for them.
I never said a man didn't approach me. I said it happened once, legitimately and recently. It also happened a few times in a bar when they were drunk and wanted anything that had a vagina, but again, not valid. it's really insulting anyways that you consider that an "option," and a reason for a woman to say: "Yay! somebody wants me!" Not really....The reasons WHY someone wants you are as important. But what else is new? Men just don't get it, they throw the baby out with the bath water, as they say. There's no point going over it.
First, I never said you said that no man approached you I was generalizing for most of the people that say they had problems finding someone. Secondly your comparing a scenario of drunk guys who just want to have sex to guys who legitimately want to get to know someone and have a relationship. That's not right
cannot rep this but on what planet is a guy saying lewd, rude things considered "oh at least he wants me." What's even more ironic is if you tell the men that claim they can't get laid to get a hooker because that's always an OPTION. what's first thing they say: "It's not the same thing because she doesn't want me for me, etc." :rolleyes: Funny how that works for them.
I don't believe in using prostitutes and don't want to Go off topic, but a quick question...
Your comparing Paying for sex with a prostitute, with having sex with someone who actually wants to sleep with you?
First, I never said you said that no man approached you I was generalizing for most of the people that say they had problems finding someone. Secondly your comparing a scenario of drunk guys who just want to have sex to guys who legitimately want to get to know someone and have a relationship. That's not right
I know you weren't talking about me directly but you said for the women (and men) that make those two statements, you can delve into it deeper and see that's not the case. I'm telling you that is the case.
Also, what? This thread is about women and men being asked by ANYONE, you never said legitimately you just said anybody that asks them should be considered "somebody wants you then and so can't say otherwise."
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Funny how that works for them.