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Originally Posted by Davros
There are no hiking groups around here. Besides, that's too scary. Nobody in such a group would like me. I know it.
And you don't know this dump. If you try talking casually to people in grocery lines, they look at you like you are insane. People are very insular around here (except the college kids of course). If you're one of their family or someone they've known for 20 years, they care. Otherwise, they'd rather you shut up and keep away. You basically don't exist as far as they're concerned. Say hi to people on the hiking trails around here and half the time they keep looking down and don't even acknowledge you. It's like nowhere I've ever lived in my life. It's a dump. But I'm stuck here.
I'm too old and too busy with work to go to college.
But thanks for trying to help a 32 year old who acts like a cantankerous old coot.
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You really need change in a big way --- seems you hate State College - I don't blame you there, it wouldnt' be my idea of good livin'..... pack up your things and try a new state, a new city, a new job. Try some internet dating, there have to be some "bigger" ladies on there looking for men. You may not find a beauty queen, but you should be able to find someone. Good luck!
Of course, I never talk to anybody anyways, have no hobbies other than watching TV and surfing the internet
And why would any woman be attracted to someone like this? Serious question. I don't care if you're handsome, rich, smart and witty, who would know it if you "never speak to anybody?"
Also, a piece of news for you: watching TV and surfing the aren't hobbies. Hobbies are things like running, collecting old antiquarian books, coins, magazines, etc.
Whipp, you're missing out on a good scene. A friend of mine found a guy after joining a church. It was one of those Unitarian Universalist churches, though, that's into a more generalized "spirituality" and progressivism, so nobody had to pretend to be into the Bible or anything. I agree with you about Sunday mornings; that's what the late morning service is for. Many churches have two morning services, one for the sleepyheads. Or if they only have one, they're smart, and schedule it for 11:00.
Lol, I live in too conservative of an area for a unitarion church..... It's all Baptist and Methodist round here.
Be more confidence will do... I can say that most of the guy being single also having the same symptom as you. Lack of confidence is the main problem... If you hav no idea how to build up your self confidence, i could give some suggestion of getting a kurukulle in the market. it's a new product that could improve the level of confidence in someone. The product that i think good to be buy would be from kechara
In this case, it's more than a lack of self-confidence, sadly. He's seeking validation by saying something overly dramatic like 'I am never going to have a girlfriend' and then arguing with people who attempt to make him feel better. It's self-pitying, which is even less attractive than lack of self-confidence. It's also very adolescent and immature, both of which are not attractive qualities.
People who try to control those around them by using self-pity are a type of emotional vampire. People cease wanting to be around them because they simply suck the life out of an area. Some men at a younger age do use the 'wounded dove' technique to get women, where they spill some deep, dark secret about themselves in the hopes of forcing empathy. This rarely works on older women, however.
To the original poster: If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten. This might seem harsh, and in a sense it is because you need to wake up and realize that you need to change both yourself and the circumstances you're in if you want to be happy. There are three basic ways you could walk away from this:
You could get offended and begin self-pitying. This will be indulgent and will certainly not affect my day. I will continue on about my day and plan my lunch, which will probably involve a sandwich of some sort.
You could simply ignore it and continue on doing what you've always done, in which case you will continue to get what you've always gotten.
You could realize that even you don't like who and what you are and you'll push yourself to change. This is the most difficult step and very few people do. You could take up dance lessons. Learn the guitar. Travel cross-country and see the beautiful country you live in. Become a more interesting person.
It's essentially up to you. People will probably continue to give you what you need, and that's all right. If your life is where you want it to be right now, continue doing what you're doing. Steady the course! If not, change.
Originally Posted by Davros
There are no hiking groups around here. Besides, that's too scary. Nobody in such a group would like me. I know it.
And you don't know this dump. If you try talking casually to people in grocery lines, they look at you like you are insane. People are very insular around here (except the college kids of course). If you're one of their family or someone they've known for 20 years, they care. Otherwise, they'd rather you shut up and keep away. You basically don't exist as far as they're concerned. Say hi to people on the hiking trails around here and half the time they keep looking down and don't even acknowledge you. It's like nowhere I've ever lived in my life. It's a dump. But I'm stuck here.
I'm too old and too busy with work to go to college.
But thanks for trying to help a 32 year old who acts like a cantankerous old coot.
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You really need change in a big way --- seems you hate State College - I don't blame you there, it wouldnt' be my idea of good livin'..... pack up your things and try a new state, a new city, a new job. Try some internet dating, there have to be some "bigger" ladies on there looking for men. You may not find a beauty queen, but you should be able to find someone. Good luck!
Girls in NYC are plentiful and that's not far away from PA-you just have to joke with them to get through the hard shell. Have you thought about relocating there? They are great women and much freindlier than a lot of other places.
Girls in NYC are plentiful and that's not far away from PA-you just have to joke with them to get through the hard shell. Have you thought about relocating there? They are great women and much freindlier than a lot of other places.
You must be joking!
He better have plenty of many things to have them give their time of day.
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