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Wow. It would be cool if that was his reaction instead.
He still thinks it was done intentionally. Talk about overreacting.
I dunno. If you actually shoved him, sounds as if you were the one doing the overreacting. Somehow I've never laid a hand in anger on anyone during my entire dating life and in my 21-year marriage. To be sure, there have been times when I've been pissed off. But physical violence? Now way.
I would dump any man who pushed me, pool or not. You don't put your hands on me in anger. Ever.
Absolutely correct. I'm in the same boat - If a woman were ever to slap me, that would be it. There would be no argument over it, no fight. I'd just leave - and have - without a second thought about the person.
As a man, I can react to physical violence in one of three ways: Allow it to happen, fight back, or just leave. I'm not a bully and would never hit a woman, nor am I a doormat. That leaves only one area.
I have been questioned on that in the past. I was honestly shocked that some women thought it was a little thing to physically strike another person and that I was overreacting by simply breaking up with them on the spot, leaving and not speaking to them again.
It was me but at the same thing I was kind of drunk too. But honestly, it was an accident. I had no intention of throwing him into the pool and it wasn't really a hard shove.
I guess I'll apologize and leave at that. Though, I don't see myself as a violent person. What if this only happened just this one time and you have never done something like that before ever?
That's pretty different that the other posters have assumed. A shove, from a drunk (doesn't really matter who you are) into a pool, would hardly be something to break-up over. I wouldn't consider a drunken shove to be "violent". But I probably wouldn't be dating such a person anyway. I don't like being around drunks.
Like all things, there are circumstances involved... was this a person you we're just hardly seeing... did you deserve being pushed in the water? Were you acting like a jerk?
I've been with Mrs. CHow a long time... I can say things to irk her enough to toss my ass in a pool.........
and vice versa.....
LOL! Yeah...Pretty much the way I feel about it too.
Absolutely correct. I'm in the same boat - If a woman were ever to slap me, that would be it. There would be no argument over it, no fight. I'd just leave - and have - without a second thought about the person.
I get that and yes that should be a deal-breaker but I didn't slap him so technically shoving isn't hitting.
I guess time will tell but more than likely it's over. Though, it was an honest mistake. Usually I don't drink so it's really the first time I've drunk that much.
Last edited by MarcellaV2; 09-19-2012 at 05:09 PM..
Let's say if it wasn't really done as a joke but rather you guys are arguing at a pool party. Then you're kind of irritated and shoved your bf/gf but only as a ''leave me alone'' type of push. Next thing you know he/she falls in the swimming pool (but not intended, it just happened).
But is that something you would get upset over and not talk to them for more than 5 days or break up?
I wouldn't really break up and would get over that nonsense by the 2nd day. Then again, that's just me. I don't know about you people. Is getting accidentally thrown into a swimming pool by your bf/gf something to react like that?
A simpler way to state this question is, "If your SO pushed you in anger, would you break up?" Whhere you land is not important. This is a physical act - a magnitude less severe than hitting but an act of physical violence/confrontation nevertheless. Such behavior is unacceptable.
[however, because it is not severe, in my opinion, I would voice my displeasure and make it clear that that's the last time it happens]
I get that and yes that should be a deal-breaker but I didn't slap him so technically shoving isn't hitting.
I guess time will tell but more than likely it's over. Though, it was an honest mistake. Usually I don't drink so it's really the first time I've drunk that much.
Drinking to excess around a pool, if you typically don't drink much....probably not a good idea.
I let my ex spouse do much worse in the past, but now I would never let it get that far. Why? The life-threatening domestic violence situation I got into started with her pushing me off the bed. That's just a red flag for what's to come--a warning sign, if you will. If it's gotten to that point, you've probably already missed several red flags. Check out the thread in this forum about emotional abuse: 10 Signs You May Be in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship . Chances are your spouse/SO are already doing at least some of those things if they believe it's acceptable to push you. ETA: She was also full of excuses like "I didn't mean it" and "I was just joking" and "I didn't push you that hard" etc. etc.
Last edited by nimchimpsky; 09-20-2012 at 07:17 AM..
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