Guys who are with girls, and seem to have a severe eye problem (dating, older)
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You're right, it is extremely rude, but then some women go out of their way to primp and preen, to alter and enhance, so much so, that when men do gawk, it's almost expected (if not by the female with the guy, then by the female he's gawking at).....it's probably no worse than what a woman would do if some big muscle-bound hunk walked by.
a 360 or gawking is rude but if women has insecurities in the first place she going see it weather your doing it or not .
Why is that shocking at all? There's a big difference between going out somewhere with someone for drinks/dinner, when you've planned an outing to spend time together...and randomly meeting a group of people for 30 minutes in a bar...that's pretty apparent. If I just met some random in the bar and we were talking on and off, if he gawked at some chick or was checking his phone why would I be peturbed? I don't deserve his undivided attention, he doesn't know me and we didn't come together for the express purpose of enjoying each other's company.
And you seem to know the guy who was staring at this girl yesterday was in a deep relationship with her? I am not approving his behavior but I don't understand why it's bothering you?
What about when a woman is with her man and she does the same thing? I have caught many women glance at me and smile while in stroll hand in hand with her man. From what I observe women are just as dogs like men when it comes to gawking. Then again i live in the largest city in the US both sides of the sex do it. Frewly.
And you seem to know the guy who was staring at this girl yesterday was in a deep relationship with her? I am not approving his behavior but I don't understand why it's bothering you?
I don't know what you mean by the term "deep relationship"...but my point has already been stated. It's rude when you're out with someone with the express purpose of enjoying each other's company and you take a break in your attention from that person to stare. I've seen this multiple times, and many times when the girl was clearly the SO. I just noted this one because it looked to me like the girl was pouring her heart out and she had to pause while this guy finished staring.
You're right, it is extremely rude, but then some women go out of their way to primp and preen, to alter and enhance, so much so, that when men do gawk, it's almost expected (if not by the female with the guy, then by the female he's gawking at).....it's probably no worse than what a woman would do if some big muscle-bound hunk walked by.
The bolded portion really irks me, because it presupposes again that men are animals who can't help but gawk when they see attractive women. Some men seem to never have this problem. A lot of men seem to always have this problem.
And sorry to burst the bubble in your pretend universe of parity between the sexes, but I've seen no more women staring at muscle bound men than I see guys staring at them. And I've certainly never seen a woman take a break in her conversation with a man or a woman to stare at someone.
No self-respecting woman should ever tolerate that behavior. They should gather their personal items immediately and leave. Once the man "got it", perhaps give him one more chance, but no more.
Last time I dated a woman without a backbone, sex was a bit of a logistical nightmare.
Flop, flop, flop ...
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Originally Posted by TaoistDude
It's rude to stare or ignore who you're with, but I'll certainly look. Much of the time, my wife will even direct my attention to some eye candy for my viewing pleasure.
When I was a wife I'd do exactly the same thing - and vice versa!
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Originally Posted by WFW&P
Women can be quite discreet when checking out men, I have learned how this is done and adopted the technique for checking out women.
Discretion is the better part of valor.
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Originally Posted by xxbabeechick
Men don't fare well in the service industry unless they are a bartender with connections, work in fine dining, a steakhouse, or a diner.
Unsubstantiated and undocumented rubbish!
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Originally Posted by xxbabeechick
Being a server requires no specialized skills
Ditto unsubstantiated and undocumented rubbish! You're working on observations garnered during a very short time as an employee in the restaurant/bar business in a very small area and obviously in a very limited sphere. People-watching teaches one a lot but jumping to conclusions based on very limited exposure is highly presumptuous.
"Have women just lost their backbone and become indifferent?" No, of course they haven't.
I'm sorry STT Resident, I've been all over the US and I know things are different elsewhere but being a male server severely limits your employment options in Manhattan. If you know any male servers in NYC, ask them, but my guess is you don't.
A lot of job openings on CL will say "women only", or like my bar, state no such thing but will take your resume and not hire you if you're a guy.
Not only will they state female only, they will also say you have to be attractive. Yes, in a job ad.
You're talking as if I don't know what I'm talking about as a server whose worked for 6 years at more than a dozen establishments.
And being a server requires no specialized skills. Being a great server means you have great memory and substantial food/beverage knowledge, but out the gate, being a server requires no specialized skills.
Are you sexy, intelligent, and confident with a deep respect for artfully hand-crafted cocktails?
...
My guess is they're not looking for Harold to serve you a martini...
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looking to hire friendly bartenders with or without exp. to work in beach attire
Wait, should I don my speedo for this interview?
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Hiring Female Students/Models/Actress
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Bar / Beverage Waiter / Waitress Needed (Female)
'Nuff said.
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Fine Dining Restaurant is looking to hire a female for coat check/ greeter position. This person must be attractive...
Wait you need to be an attractive female to check people's coats?
I didn't include the numerous ads who explicitly stated "waitress" wanted in the job title. Not the gender neutral server or the gendered "waiter".
A lot of these same ad's ask for photos along with your resume. I wonder why.
And of course there are the bars like mine who will state no such thing in an ad, and proceed to take the resume of and tell males who apply they'll get a call if they're interested.
Well if their clientele is mostly male it makes sense from a business perspective, it's the same in alot of large Asian cities as well. They know the middle age white guys will be coming in, so they'll wrangle up some Filipino or Thai ladies to be the young, alluring waitress.
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