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There is little in common with the two and heres why :
A roll in the hay with a hooker or two 10 years ago has zero to little impact on the current relationship.
Your example is totally different. A father knowing if they are his children or not, obviously has a significant bearing/impact on the current relationship.
A guy not telling a guy he paid prostitutes and a wife not telling her husband he's not the father have plenty in common and aren't totally different as they're both going by 'some things are better left unsaid'.
Though I wasn't doing a comparison to the acts or their impact the commonality between the acts to me is the person keeping quiet does so because telling may have an effect they don't want.
As for a paying a prostitute having zero to little impact on the current relationship that's a tossup as the relationship may not have existed if the other partner had this knowledge and if that factor was so important to not have even begun the relationship it may end the relationship.
There commonality is both are considering their action something better left unsaid as it may have an effect they don't want. Though I wasn't doing a comparison to the acts or their impact rather the notion 'some things are better left unsaid'.
There is plenty in common with the notion that some things are pretty left unsaid and the example is not totally different as the premise was 'some things are better left unsaid' and a husband not being the father can possibly be a thing that is better left unsaid.
As for a paying a prostitute having zero to little impact on the current relationship that's a tossup as the relationship may not have existed if the other partner had this knowledge and if that factor was so important to not have even begun the relationship person may end the relationship.
Based on your last paragraph, there would be VERY few relationships at all. If everyone was upfront and honest about everything from early on, as I say many wouldn't exist. That goes both ways of course, males to females and females to males. Everyone or nearly everyone has skeletons in their closet.
The key is.....if he/she needs to know eg. its going to effect the relationship....then you need to say.
Based on your last paragraph, there would be VERY few relationships at all. If everyone was upfront and honest about everything from early on, as I say many wouldn't exist. That goes both ways of course, males to females and females to males.
The key is.....if he/she needs to know eg. its going to effect the relationship....then you need to say.
I doubt that as in my experience many people are capable of being honest about themselves including their actions and have a partner.
Bit curious as to how the key is 'if it's going to affect the relationship then you need to say' when your notion regarding prostitution is 'some things are better left unsaid'. To me that suggests you clearly know it may have an affect as the relationship may not have even begun due to it and are knowingly omitting acknowledging a potential.
I doubt that as in my experience many people are capable of being honest about themselves including their actions and have a partner.
But that's because you probably hang around with religious, conservative types who wouldn't dare tell a lie or withhold the truth. Also, you probably don't hang around with bar/club types that have been with a ton of people and therefore don't have much to hide.
But that's because you probably hang around with religious, conservative types who wouldn't dare tell a lie or withhold the truth. Also, you probably don't hang around with bar/club types that have been with a ton of people and therefore don't have much to hide.
Not at all.
I hang around liars, manipulators, cheaters, and deceivers. The example of a wife not telling her husband the child/ren aren't his due to 'some things are better left unsaid' stems from actual accounts I know.
I've also bartended for quite some time and frequent bars and clubs.
In my experiences the 'some things are better left unsaid' notion tends to stem from those that have actions that most likely the vast majority of people would consider dealbreakers such as cheating, lengthy prison record, rape, sexual assault, molestation, and prostitution.
In my experiences the 'some things are better left unsaid' notion tends to stem from those that have actions that most likely the vast majority of people would consider dealbreakers such as cheating, lengthy prison record, rape, sexual assault, molestation, and prostitution.
Why tell anyone anything about what you've done sexually, though? It always causes problems.
All they need to know is that you're STD free and nothing more.
Why tell anyone anything about what you've done sexually, though? It always causes problems.
All they need to know is that you're STD free and nothing more.
Possibly some people tell a potential/current partner what they've done sexually as they know it may affect their decision. In my opinion if you wouldn't tell a potential/current partner of your past actions the reason is possibly because you know it may sway their decision to one you don't want aka 'cause problems'.
The 'STD free is all you need to know' is also what I advise my gals though I tack on just guess the guy is either a rapist, sexual assaulter, or paid prostitutes and it seems to work quite well for them. Though that's probably because they feel they get a free-pass to cheat on him and deceive him about paternity whenever they want.
Possibly some people tell a potential/current partner what they've done sexually as they know it may affect their decision. In my opinion if you wouldn't tell a potential/current partner of your past actions the reason is possibly because you know it may sway their decision to one you don't want aka 'cause problems'.
The 'STD free is all you need to know' is also what I advise my gals though I tack on just guess the guy is either a rapist, sexual assaulter, or paid prostitutes and it seems to work quite well for them. Though that's probably because they feel they get a free-pass to cheat on him and deceive him about paternity whenever they want.
Of course, which is why I usually avoid the question if asked. No way am I spilling the beans when it comes to that.
Let's just say I've had a very strong run (probably too strong) since like 1999 that would absolutely not be viewed as favorable by any woman that's halfway decent. Maybe some trailer trash chicks or porn chicks would be okay with what I've done, but that'd probably be it...lol
Last edited by bicoastal10; 10-28-2012 at 11:48 PM..
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