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Have you ever not pursued a relationship with someone you really liked because of timing? Because you just didn't want to date at that time, maybe you recently ended a long relationship? I hear people say this sometimes, but I can't relate. Is it just a nice way of rejecting someone you're not that into?
You can still be friends. What if the person is financially set back and have other commitments going on? I think it depends on the individual. I've put wanting to date certain guys on hold, because I need to get my life together. On top of that, if I'm not 100% emotionally there, I'd be unfair to that person if I'm still hung up over someone. So I hold back.
I've lost girls because of timing and girls have lost me because of it. Timing I found out in my life was/ is very important. You could meet the person of your dreams, but if "both" of you are not ready for "it" a relationship/ anthing than it will not happen.
I've lost girls because of timing and girls have lost me because of it. Timing I found out in my life was/ is very important. You could meet the person of your dreams, but if "both" of you are not ready for "it" a relationship/ anthing than it will not happen.
Well, that's good to know. I was reading that book "He's Just Not That Into You" and they make it sound like everything is flat-out rejection.
Well, that's good to know. I was reading that book "He's Just Not That Into You" and they make it sound like everything is flat-out rejection.
"He's just not that into you" is a completely different matter from timing. I can look back and clearly pick out 3 missed opportunities because the timing was not right, but they were very into me.
Well, that's good to know. I was reading that book "He's Just Not That Into You" and they make it sound like everything is flat-out rejection.
No, I've rejected girls because I knew I was moving from one coast to another. I've rejected them because I was going away to college. I've rejected them because I had a lot of problems at the time ande I was trying to overcome them without distractions. Timimg is very important. I know women who have rejected me for similar reasons. So in my honest opinion "timing" is crucial. If you ever question why someone rejects you, ask them. It might sound easier than doing, but atleast you'll know. Tell them to be honest with you. That way you'll know if it's you or "timing".
Years ago I liked a girl who was getting over someone whom she really loved. I called her a few times, but just didn't think that she was feeling me. I got the feeling she just wasn't over her ex, which she wasn't. She told me this. Years later I run into her in a bar, and she couldn't take her eyes off me. At that point, I was years removed from even thinking about her. She was just a minor crush anyway. But I ignored her and went on with my business. In the past I could be very petty when it comes to matters of the heart. If you hurt me, I would have hurt you back. So it was a little pay back.
Similar situation which worked the other way. This girl liked me once from this school I was attending. She even went so far as to following me around. She was a ten. Gorgeous, but my mind/ heart was set on someone who was like a nine. Anyhow, she continually followed me around, wanted to take me to lunch, etc, etc. I just wasn't feeling it. Years later I'm alone and in a bar and she shows up. Looks better than what she did before (if that's possible). She when she liked me always wore jeans, so I never saw how sexy her legs were. So I go up to her and I'm like, "hey, do you remember me". I knew she did, but she replied, "you look sorta familiar". Then I told her where we knew each other. Then she replied "yes". I downplayed her following me around, etc, etc. She then went on ignoring me, by turning to her friend and blatantly ignoring me. It was so blatant that it was obvious that she was paying me back. She then turns to her friend and says so I could hear her, "there's no hot guys in here". Then one guy comes in who was like half of what I was, and then she was like, "he's not bad". Just loud enough for me to hear. I was laughing inside, because I knew "exactly" what she was doing. Getting me back. You don't forget someone you had a crush/ liked especially for that long. I knew what she was doing and I figured I didn't have a chance in hel l of ever getting with her. I blew it. When she liked me, my heart was already out for somone else. Who I barely remember. I've had alot of these scenarios in life. That's why I say that timing is very important.
Maybe I'm too much of a romantic to be affected by timing. When I meet someone who's amazing, I just go for it regardless. That's why I've had a hard time believing people who say "I'm not looking for a relationship right now."
But I'm talking about someone I've already spent a fair amount of time with, already felt some electricity with. Not just a guy that I've seen around and thought was cute. Once a connection is obvious, it just feels inevitable. Who cares if I'm moving in 4 months!
Maybe I'm too much of a romantic to be affected by timing. When I meet someone who's amazing, I just go for it regardless. That's why I've had a hard time believing people who say "I'm not looking for a relationship right now."
But I'm talking about someone I've already spent a fair amount of time with, already felt some electricity with. Not just a guy that I've seen around and thought was cute. Once a connection is obvious, it just feels inevitable. Who cares if I'm moving in 4 months!
I probably wouldn't enter in a relationship if I was moving in four months. The fun of the four months would not be worth the sadness when the relationship had to end. I'd rather not get involved at all.
I think it depends on why the person isn't ready for a relationship. Is it because they just got out of a relationship and need to get over that other person? Are they getting ready to move away or go to school? Maybe they aren't in a good place mentally, perhaps they are dealing with depression or self esteem issues. Maybe they just need to date around and sow wild oats. Some people don't care about that, but I don't think some people can be content settling down without being a little wild first.
In an ideal world when you meet someone you like you would figure out how to be ready for a relationship, and I think some people do, but it isn't that easy. I honestly believe I've dated guys that would have been perfect for me but they weren't ready for a relationship. They were too soon out of relationships, had to much uncertainty in other parts of their lives, etc. It hurts to feel someone is right for you, just not right now. You just have to accept it though. Timing matters a lot.
I probably wouldn't enter in a relationship if I was moving in four months. The fun of the four months would not be worth the sadness when the relationship had to end. I'd rather not get involved at all.
But what if you went for it and in those four months you got to know the person, fell in love, and made new plans together?
But what if you went for it and in those four months you got to know the person, fell in love, and made new plans together?
That sounds different. Sometimes people fall in love "unexpectedly" . Which for me is usually always how it happens. I'm not even trying to figure that one out. In your case what's the problem? If you've made plans "together" than it sounds like things are going well. Or did he break them off. Sometimes, people have to outweigh everything that they could lose for staying with someone. Does he have kids that he wouldn't be around? You're not giving enough information or variables. Plus, we aren't getting his take. There's three sides to every story. Yours, his and the truth.
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