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I seen the documentary and I really enjoy the show. This has never happened to me, but I am always amazed at how much stuff people overlook when they are having online Long distance relationships. It really seems that they do not understand they are in love with the fantasy, instead of the person or they wouldn't let certain things slide. For example the first two shows I seen, each supposed guy the women were talking too, had pretty good jobs, making pretty good money, yet can not find time for a visit. Also just how over the top some of the stories were and not wanting to skype or video confernece. Yet these women were ready to marry these guys, it just seemed so crazy to me.
Once you met, wouldn't it be like any other long distance relationship?
I think your comment was something about living in fantasy due to never having met the person and carrying on a "relationship" online. So, once you meet and hit it off, wouldn't it be just like any other ldr?
I watched this show catfish, and I saw the episode when this pretty blonde went to meet her internet love. Even fought over him with her sister who talked to him first. Then met him, then holy crap it was a chick impersonating a dude. She was a lesbian!
The girls name is Summer Craft. She lives about 80 miles from me. She posted a status update on FB calling Obama a "****** in sheeps clothing." I went to school with people that know her and said she's not a nice person and spoiled. That part wasn't depicted on the show; however, she comes off on the show as someone who got dooped. I say karma just came around on her!
Have you or anyone you know ever been duped into falling for someone online only to find out that the person you care for doesn't exist?
There's a documentary called Catfish that follows the story of a young man who falls for a woman over the net. They talk for 8 months and he ends up surprising her with a visit. You can guess what happens next. (I watched this today and it was surprisingly heartbreaking.)
Is this common? What is the mentality behind it?
And why would someone let an internet relationship go on for such a long time? 8 months? 10 years?
(MTV currently has a series based on the documentary and it's really eye-opening. Next one is about a woman who has talked to a man for 10 years and never met him.)
I saw an episode from the series a couple of days ago. In this one, some teenage girl kept bragging about how many people she'd catfished, and although I'm not completely certain, I feel that the episode was staged. However, the initial documentary with the Schulman guy seemed legit.
I saw an episode from the series a couple of days ago. In this one, some teenage girl kept bragging about how many people she'd catfished, and although I'm not completely certain, I feel that the episode was staged. However, the initial documentary with the Schulman guy seemed legit.
Some stuff in the true documentary was fabricated (eg the return postcards in the mailbox); however, the woman was really fabricating a deep story. When you are online, it takes very little effort. It's easy to get wrapped up in someone, because the physical aspect goes away. You fall for all the sweet things they are telling you and the fact that you're getting to really know someone.
You end up playing a song and dance with someone, falling for would you ideally want in a person. That's how you get dooped, because it's easy to say the right things, but much harder to follow through and act on those things.
I started chatting with a guy who approached me because he knew about my job, which is public-facing, so I didn't think anything was off. He was flirtatious, and I wasn't looking, but I did feel flattered by the attention...Figured he just wanted to check in and chat sometimes about how the day was going, etc.
But no, this guy was beyond focused. After a couple of days of circling me, he started in with, "Do you want to hear a bedtime story?" The guy started sending me stories that he claimed were written just for me! They were totally generic (and not really all that hot) soft-porn scenarios featuring him and me, meeting up for sexytimes in garages and country music concerts and stuff. I had to laugh because it was obviously recycled material.
I got a bit involved, though, and wanted to see where he could take it. I suggested some other kinds of scenarios, situations and characters and scenes that would have been more of a turn-on for someone like me. But he lost interest quickly - the rules, apparently, were that he would write these painfully dull scenarios, and I should lap them up, and that was how it was gonna work.
I was still sort of intrigued and flattered by the attention, though, so I played along and said I enjoyed the stories. He complained that I wasn't letting him know if I found them hot - however I responded, it was never enough. He would assail me with tons of real-time chatting (on Facebook) as soon as I got into work in the morning, which wasn't convenient. I tried to explain that email worked better, since I was busy during the workday and could fit things into my schedule easier that way. But noooooooo, real-time chat was the only thing he was interested in. And since it was getting more and more explicit, I had to pull the plug.
He sulked for a while and then fell off the radar. He had a business Facebook page for his freelance art gig, so we were still "friends" and would occasionally stay in touch, though I didn't know what he was getting out of it.
Once he thanked me effusively because one of my "friends," a crazy chick named Brynn with a pretty good profile pic, had fanned his business page. He was over the moon about it. "Thank you thank you thank you for sending me Brynn!" He crowed.
I wrote back and told him I hadn't sent him anybody, and I thought she was nuts. He assumed I was jealous - "That's okay, if I ever have sex with Brynn, I'll be thinking about you!!!" Totally giddy about this. I'm thinking, wtf? Excuse me while I barf copiously.
She turned out to be Mormon, which he liked initially, because he had been a divinity student himself at a well-known school. I think he felt there was a certain challenge in trying to get her to sit still for his "bedtime story" treatment. But it must not have worked. He pouted that she was threatening to sic her husband on him, and after a while she stopped "liking" his posts. Must not have been a match made in heaven after all...
When he's in a bad mood, he yells at me for "sending" him people he doesn't like. And I have to remind him that he has a band/celeb page for his art, and that he actually should WANT more people to like it.
"Thanks for sending me another freak, this guy's really insane, wtf?" And I tell him, "You know very well I have no control over who friends you, but why wouldn't you want another fan?"
He's such an asshat. But I somehow can't stop following the bizarre course of his excursions, at least to the extent I can put them together.
He's always got some new sexy artist chick friend who floods his wall with fifty messages a day, and then she's outta there.
Oh, and he's married...been that way for thirty years...says his wife has no idea what he does on the 'pyooter.
It's fascinating - for me, personally, a virtual sex life with a shifting cast of random strangers that had to be maintained like crazy, doesn't seem like it could possibly be satisfying. But this guy devotes large chunks of his day to maintaining old flames and acquiring new ones.
I guess it works for him, although you could argue it's not necessarly just harmless fun. He told me one woman fell for him super hard, and when he dumped her she went ape$hit and started contacting his wife. He had a bit of lying and smoothing over to do after that. He's definitely dangerous for the kind of woman who could get attached to him. I think he's got NPD - just a total frickin' narcissist. Pretty sad and lame actually.
Last edited by PrincessDorkNoodles; 11-26-2012 at 10:27 AM..
I watched this show catfish, and I saw the episode when this pretty blonde went to meet her internet love. Even fought over him with her sister who talked to him first. Then met him, then holy crap it was a chick impersonating a dude. She was a lesbian!
I about DIED when "Jamison" turned out to be that crazy *****!!!
I think the internet has changed how we view life. I have a few cyber friends that I haven't met but have chatted with for so long online that we know each other's real name and what we look like (and many I have Skyped with). None of these are romantic relationships at all and would never be.
I was catfished years ago before the term existed or even online dating. Back in my late teens early 20's before internet dating I did call dating where you chat with someone on the phone. One guy seemed to be my perfect choice: Hispanic, great job, good looks, etc. I was 18 at the time and we chatted 6 months or longer before we met. Eventually we started talking about marriage and me moving into his downtown condo. Finally we did meet and went for a ride. Probably not a god idea in hindsight but I was a naive 18 year old. During the time we chatted he kept talking about the future and how I am moving in with him, etc. We made plans that night for dinner at the 95th (fancy restaurant in the Hancock building in Chicago on the 95th floor)for 7pm. I was excited, told my parents I had a date with a nice guy and got ready. 7pm comes and he's not there but I tell myself he's coming. He never does and I am crushed. I sent him a letter (remember this is before email)and it is returned no address. I call the number he gave me and it was disconnected.
I know technically that isn't catfish because I did meet him but it taught me a lesson never to get serious with someone until I meet and see their intentions. Since then I have had several guys pull this with me and once I asked to meet them they disappeared.
My exboyfriend met someone after chatting for 8 months and even becoming engaged and without knowing her he moved to New York. Though she was real her intention was to scam him and he found this out before he married her.
Never ever trust completely as they are not you and you are not them. Online romance is in the head it becomes an emotional drug where everything is perfect. Truth is far different. One must be pragmatic.
Yeah, dealing with a person's heartbreak and watching her spiral down is an absolute crack up!
She's been single ever since and it's been about 5 years...she simply cannot trust anyone after that.
Yep. Hilarious.
Sorry, but this IS ridiculous.
Your friend has some other type of emotional issues going on.
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