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I do make my own money, your response is totally rude and so off the subject.
No, it's not off the subject at all. You're basically complaining about how his likely drop in pay will affect YOUR lifestyle instead of supporting him to the fullest extent while taking matters into your own hands and going out and making more money to offset his potential pay decrease.
Stop looking for a handout and go take matters into your own hands financially. If you can't or aren't willing to do that, go have a seat in the corner and keep quiet.
Last edited by bicoastal10; 11-29-2012 at 06:10 AM..
Not sure what the problem is ? Is there something about being a Magistrate which affects people's quality of life , their mortgages and income in the US ? People do it all the time and I think it is a wonderful thing to get involved in local community issues and hopefully with a motive of positive action ?
Hubby thought about running for our local council and decided against it in the end. I would have supported him 100% though. Politics affect our lives every which way you look at it and getting involved to me sounds a pretty good thing and a positive rather than a negative.
The world as they say is run by those who turn up.
It is not as if we are talking about National Politics which I think encroach on your private life a lot more. And let's face it most candidates get knocked off at the first hurdle anyway.
Yes there is extra work and it is a challenging post, but surely also a rewarding one ?
Another reason why a man shouldn't get married. One of the best arguments I heard about no marriage was because of situations like this. If you are a single man, you can quit your job and go after a lower paying job that you like. If you are married, you can't do that because the wife won't allow you due to the lifestyle hit.
Another reason why a man shouldn't get married. One of the best arguments I heard about no marriage was because of situations like this. If you are a single man, you can quit your job and go after a lower paying job that you like. If you are married, you can't do that because the wife won't allow you due to the lifestyle hit.
Poppycock ! I am a woman and I could not care less about the size of Hubby's wallet. If I was that bothered I would have married money and I had quite a few opportunities. This might come as a shock but women like men are all individual and have different characters, personalities. Some like men are venal, others not.
To imply that all women are the same is grossly offensive as well as intellectually disingenuous. I deeply resent being protrayed as a venal and shallow creature simply because of my sex.
It is like saying all men are sexual predators or cheats. Completely untrue and out of order. This "wife" does not "allow" her Husband to do things, he is not a dog, I do not give him "permission". This wife discusses things with him like a proper mature adult and let HIM make his own decision.
An odd concept I know for women haters but still. Marriage ( and relationships in general) are about having respect for your life partner and treating them like grown ups, which means thrashing out problems and being open. It is about dialogue not about dictatorship ( from either side).
What a narrow minded pathetic view of both men and woman you have. Women as money grabbing tarts and domestic dictators and men as pathetic little whimpy, whimpering creatures too afraid to say "Boo" to their spouse. How insulting to men and degrading to women.
Poppycock ! I am a woman and I could not care less about the size of Hubby's wallet. If I was that bothered I would have married money and I had quite a few opportunities. This might come as a shock but women like men are all individual and have different characters, personalities. Some like men are venal, others not.
To imply that all women are the same is grossly offensive as well as intellectually disingenuous. I deeply resent being protrayed as a venal and shallow creature simply because of my sex.
It is like saying all men are sexual predators or cheats. Completely untrue and out of order. This "wife" does not "allow" her Husband to do things, he is not a dog, I do not give him "permission". This wife discusses things with him like a proper mature adult and let HIM make his own decision.
An odd concept I know for women haters but still. Marriage ( and relationships in general) are about having respect for your life partner and treating them like grown ups, which means thrashing out problems and being open. It is about dialogue not about dictatorship ( from either side).
What a narrow minded pathetic view of both men and woman you have. Women as money grabbing tarts and domestic dictators and men as pathetic little whimpy, whimpering creatures too afraid to say "Boo" to their spouse. How insulting to men and degrading to women.
Grow up.
I guarantee you a majority of married woman would not have your same attitude if their man quit their $200K job for a shot at a $50K job. You live in a fantasy world if you think most woman would just be happy that their partner just choose a much lower paying job that he enjoys.
Its funny (strange not haha) not long ago there was a thread about a woman who got a good job offer in another state working on a prestigious project for a few years but her husband would not temporarily relocate so she could pursue a good career move and the consensus was that she should pass on it not that her husband should support her. Here you have a husband who maybe making a negative career move and not only is she being encouraged to support HIS decision to upset the status quo and possibly take a financial hit, she is being accused of being greedy, told to quit taking handouts and get a job, go sit in a corner and basically her concern is targeted as a reason men shouldn’t marry.
My ex had a few out there projects. He lost money which not only affected him, but both of us as a family unit. He also would quit good jobs for trivial reasons, which also affected BOTH of us financially. He continued to do these things and that contributed to the demise of our marriage. I don’t think the OP is selfish for being concerned about how this move will affect their financial well being or the emotional health of their marriage.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,748,461 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bicoastal10
OP, go make your own money and stop looking for a handout. If you want a certain income and won't be satisfied with your husband's income, go out and earn it yourself.
This was totally uncalled for.
OP, it sounds like your husband has a reasonable dream. It is highly unlikely that your hubby would win the campaign on his first try. Still, I think you should support him.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,748,461 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2mares
Its funny (strange not haha) not long ago there was a thread about a woman who got a good job offer in another state working on a prestigious project for a few years but her husband would not temporarily relocate so she could pursue a good career move and the consensus was that she should pass on it not that her husband should support her. Here you have a husband who maybe making a negative career move and not only is she being encouraged to support HIS decision to upset the status quo and possibly take a financial hit, she is being accused of being greedy, told to quit taking handouts and get a job, go sit in a corner and basically her concern is targeted as a reason men shouldn’t marry.
My ex had a few out there projects. He lost money which not only affected him, but both of us as a family unit. He also would quit good jobs for trivial reasons, which also affected BOTH of us financially. He continued to do these things and that contributed to the demise of our marriage. I don’t think the OP is selfish for being concerned about how this move will affect their financial well being or the emotional health of their marriage.
Was that the one where the couple was living in the PNW and was trying to move somewhere in WV?
If so, different circumstances. That case, the wife was moving somewhere remote which had very few opportunities for the hubby and questions whether that would be financially viable were valid. This case, a husband is still making a good living and this is a passion of his, plus he probably won't win the first time out and may decide to forget about it.
Was that the one where the couple was living in the PNW and was trying to move somewhere in WV?
If so, different circumstances. That case, the wife was moving somewhere remote which had very few opportunities for the hubby and questions whether that would be financially viable were valid. This case, a husband is still making a good living and this is a passion of his, plus he probably won't win the first time out and may decide to forget about it.
No. It wasnt in a remote location and the company even offered him a job position. He didnt want to make other arrangements for visitation of his child from a previous marriage.
Just saying. Its seems its the wife who is always suppose to support husbands career changes regardless of the situation. Wondering if one reversed both scenarios, what the responses would be.
Im not saying the OP shouldnt support her SO. I dont think she is being selfish for being concerned about finances and the emotional toll a campaign can create. Im not clear on the job situation. If being a magistrate would be in addition to his PT job or instead of. In addition to would mean lots of work time which would affect the marriage and future family planning. Even being just a magistrate or other political figure can be stressful, time consuming and have negative impacts on family life. These things are defiantly things to consider. I can understand why she might be apprehensive.
Another reason why a man shouldn't get married. One of the best arguments I heard about no marriage was because of situations like this. If you are a single man, you can quit your job and go after a lower paying job that you like. If you are married, you can't do that because the wife won't allow you due to the lifestyle hit.
Quote:
Originally Posted by bicoastal10
No, it's not off the subject at all. You're basically complaining about how his likely drop in pay will affect YOUR lifestyle instead of supporting him to the fullest extent while taking matters into your own hands and going out and making more money to offset his potential pay decrease.
Stop looking for a handout and go take matters into your own hands financially. If you can't or aren't willing to do that, go have a seat in the corner and keep quiet.
Quote:
Originally Posted by capitol
I guarantee you a majority of married woman would not have your same attitude if their man quit their $200K job for a shot at a $50K job. You live in a fantasy world if you think most woman would just be happy that their partner just choose a much lower paying job that he enjoys.
Guys, the thing you dont understand is that marriage is a partnership. What one does affects both, today and for the future. Both spouses need to do what is in the best interest for the family. Sometimes this requires some sacrifice on both sides.
So yes, single is the time to pursue personal aspirations with no regard to consequences. Married time is the time to consider the consequences your actions have on those you love.
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