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I don't know of any man that is in that situation and wants to badly get married but she just won't budge after 6 years of him waiting. That's laughable. It's always the other way around for a reason; like you said just stringing her along.....
Because men generally won't put up with BS for too long. They are very practical and logical in that way instead of being led on by emotions.
I mean how often do we hear about men being stuck for years with a woman that lies, cheats multiple times or even verbally trashes him?? Not much; perhaps 1 in 100 and that's because he has severe self-esteem issues.
Yet, there are many stories about women staying with guys who won't commit them, cheat, lie, etc.
I broke off a relationship after 3 years because she didn't want to get married and have kids. It happens.
You used logic. Unlike some women, they would probably have kept going on wasting more years, thinking he would one day change his mind.
Like stated before, you guys are more practical (a man will only put up with bs for a very limited time but not too long). Girl won't commit or treats you poorly, you leave. Yet, for some reason, many women in the same position still stay in that pointless relationship.
Before this thread closes which I think it'll be rather soon:
They don't make "relationship batteries" to last like they used to.
But some who have less to lose want to get together in hopes they are the exception or at least make someone think they are when a percentage of them (doesn't mean all) have ulterior motives and we know what happens then.
Today anything seems to go and the worst part that happens on the fly and unexpected which makes relationships namely marriage minded men which this thread is in question about a confusing one for some. Men see what goes on and many of those want to avoid the meat grinder at all costs hence not wanting to marry and even co-habit though many women will deny that can happen to a man just for saying "I do".
Then they are those men who went through the meat grinder and come back for potentially more.
Then there are many women who really do understand what men go through in the courts and some/many play dumb to what happens in their particular scenario as far as the financials going into such marriage prospects and its potential outcome.
So why should men "take a chance" on marriage? Marriage on the most part doesn't benefit men these days and wished it did but the equality that women now have and the roles and now nothing is that defined anymore and that also can change on the fly or a potential bigger and better deal is sought.
I'm just kindly responding so don't tell me "don't get married then" as I already obviously know this or to tell me that "I'm bitter" and such. Nope, I'm not bitter but quite sad to what's been happening out there and that it will continue to do so.
Humans are not treated like humans anymore on the most part either as they're used for someones selfishness.
Most of what I read in this thread is dancing around or trying to justify. I just hope you've been doing it with good music in the background. lol!
I was never interested in cohabitation and never will be. I'm really old-fashioned in that area. If he's just going to be my bf then we can date without living together but I'll still dump him eitherway if after 2 years, I see it going no where.
Only way I'll live with a man if we're on the same page, it's proceed by a proposal, there is a date set on as well as where it's happening and invitations are send out.... in other words: GET TO THE POINT; FULL COMMITMENT OR NOTHING.
A "full commitment" can take many different appearances. I am currently in a fully committed, exclusive relationship in that both me and my partner are, yes, fully committed and exclusive to each other. But neither of us have the desire to co-habitate at this time, and perhaps never. And marriage is still another matter altogether. We may be fully committed in this manner until one of us departs this earth.
It isn't like we are the first to break through some social barriers. I have an uncle who has been in a committed relationship with a woman since the late 1960s. They have separate residences a few doors apart (it is speculation as to whether they technically live together or not), no marriage. Other than those details, they look and act like a long-time, happily married couple. It is quite possible that the "happily" part comes from the constitution of their relationship.
Before this thread closes which I think it'll be rather soon:
They don't make "relationship batteries" to last like they used to.
But some who have less to lose want to get together in hopes they are the exception or at least make someone think they are when a percentage of them (doesn't mean all) have ulterior motives and we know what happens then.
Today anything seems to go and the worst part that happens on the fly and unexpected which makes relationships namely marriage minded men which this thread is in question about a confusing one for some. Men see what goes on and many of those want to avoid the meat grinder at all costs hence not wanting to marry and even co-habit though many women will deny that can happen to a man just for saying "I do".
Then they are those men who went through the meat grinder and come back for potentially more.
Then there are many women who really do understand what men go through in the courts and some/many play dumb to what happens in their particular scenario as far as the financials going into such marriage prospects and its potential outcome.
Humans are not treated like humans anymore on the most part either as they're used for someones selfishness.
Most of what I read in this thread is dancing around or trying to justify. I just hope you've been doing it with good music in the background. lol!
As far as talking about the financials many here are exaggerating what happens and treating every guy like he has the earning potential of Kobe Bryant or George Clooney. For average folk most times men are merely paying child support...if you think that is being put through the meant grinder it is unfortunate.
Women pay child support now as well. In the state where I live, right or wrong, you can access the court records as it pertains to issues of child support. Alimony is not something routine. Men who participated fully in raising their kids while married are getting increasing amounts of custody, sometimes primary custody. For average folk that divorce there are no winners financially...once the household splits in two, everyone's quality of life goes downhill.
Of course they're marriage minded men. But hear me out and this is how alot of young men in their 20's are looking at it
If I'm getting all the benefits of marriage without having to actually get married....Why would I do it unless its my dream woman? Hell I know guys who have a different women for each thing. One they date, sleep with casually on the side, one that has their children, one that cooks for them etc. I mean you have to put yourself in the position of guys and ask yourself the same thing.
To put it Simply... There's too many women giving out all the benefits of marriage that it offsets all the women who won't without the ring. If you say I'm not having his child unless we're married that's fine but there's tons of women who are willing to(40% of babies in America in 2011 were had outside of wedlock). I've been in good to great relationships in my life, but in 2012 a woman would literally have to sweep me off feet to Tie the not
Of course they're marriage minded men. But hear me out and this is how alot of young men in their 20's are looking at it
If I'm getting all the benefits of married without having to get legally bound to a woman... Why would I do it unless its my dream woman? Hell I know guys who have a different women for each thing. One they date, sleep with casually on the side, one that has their children, one that cooks for them etc. I mean you have to put yourself in the position of guys
To put it Simply... There's too many women giving out all the benefits of marriage that it offsets all the women who won't without the ring. If you say I'm not having his child unless we're married that's fine but there's tons of women who are willing to(40% of babies in America in 2011 were had outside of wedlock)
But then there is still an expectation there that the man is going to support his child financially, and that expectation can either happen either by a good faith effort by the guy, or it can be mandated by the court system. That part doesn't change whether you are married or not.
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