Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I think that is a big part of why some LDR's fall apart. People are so excited to finally be together (who wouldn't be?) that you skip an essential step. I want to do things right.
I don't think that it was a factor in my particular situation's demise, per se (we stayed together for five years), but if I were faced with the same choice, I'd do it differently. After that relationship broke up, and I went back to dating conventionally with guys who weren't long distance, I remembered that dating is nice, and I don't think I'd give up that step again.
My personal choice for an LDR would be closing the gap in short order, but maintaining my own residence.
In my previous relationship, which started out LDR, when I moved to his city/state, I moved in with him, at his request. In our case, I don't think it ended up mattering much one way or another, but faced with a similar decision again, I'd likely move to the new city/state, but NOT cohabit right away. Skipping over the "dating" phase once we were living in the same ZIP code, and going straight from LDR to cohabiting with no conventional "dating" period in between is not likely something I'd do again.
After I first moved, I stayed with him for two weeks until I moved into my own apartment. It was important to me to have my own space in my new town. Of course, we spent most of our time at his place and I only kept the apartment for six months. Still, I had it.
If I had it to do over again, I wouldn't change that part. Maybe I would have used the hot tub in my complex more often...
When you and your partner got to the step of moving in together, how did you decide who should move where? How did they (or you) deal with what you sacrificed? (family, friends, job, etc) I can fill you in on my situation if you are interested. I am more interested in what you all have to say. Thanks!
p.s. Don't tell me LDRs are stupid and worthless. Clearly, I don't think that. So don't waste your time and finger typing on this thread.
I am currently in a long distance relationship. Actually we are both going to move, as I am studying abroad. She will move to my country first, which will be a big step for her. We are doing it that way, because it is the most practical way.
Then when we have saved up some money, then we will move back to her country. Income inequality in her country is much higher, so we are better off in my country in the beginning.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
