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Yes admittedly they can, but why would they want to though, when being married *and* doing that at the same time is so much more romantic, than the other way around?
Sexual intercourse is a lot of things, but I don't think it's quite the hearts and flowers you imagine it to be. It has sounds, smells. Do you know what the act actually entails?
Sexual intercourse is a lot of things, but I don't think it's quite the hearts and flowers you imagine it to be. It has sounds, smells. Do you know what the act actually entails?
And if you've never had sex before, just because you really love someone doesn't mean you're going to be good at it, especially that first time.
Yes admittedly they can, but why would they want to though, when being married *and* doing that at the same time is so much more romantic, than the other way around?
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Thank you for sharing more about your thoughts on this. It is certainly not for me and none of my business to ever judge anyone negatively, for being intimate with someone they love...if they love each other and the act of physical intimacy is consensual, it is not up to me (nor would I want it to be) to decide how consenting adults feel that they want to express their love and affection, for each other
At the same time, for my own self, and personally, I also know what I need on an emotional level, to feel happy and loved romantically, by someone very special to me. My own personal beliefs (for myself and in my own case here; please understand that I am not intending to judge anyone else negatively, at all here) is that I know and am aware, based on my own emotional needs and temperament, full physical intimacy should ideally not occur (for me) until at the earliest an official engagement, and preferably, after marriage. I need to know that I have a permanent foundation and future to build on, and with the one I love and who has my heart, before I will share that kind of most special loving intimacy, with her. I want to have a loving fiancé / wife, before we share that loving blessing together...in my humble opinion, it makes it incredibly more special and sacred and truly beautiful, that way
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilyflower3191981
Are you asking why would people want to have premarital sex?
I have to respectfully disagree with you, knight. I don't believe being married and doing "that" at the same time is so much more romantic. I think when two people intensely love each other and offer each other love, respect, tlc, the sex can be mind blowing and intensely romantic. Marriage has nothing to do with it.
I know a lot of people who are miserable in their marriages. My own sister is one of them. Yes, she is married, but the start to this great divine sex adventure was quite lame in my opinion. Her husband is a cheater and pathetic loser, she is afraid of being a single mother at almost 40 years of age. She is seriously depressed. I honestly believe she should let a hot young man take her and screw the living jesus out of her. So she can finally understand what is called HOT romantic sex !!!
Traditional Christianity taught people that sex is a beautiful divine creation from God, and it only ought to be shared with the person whom you want to spend the rest of your life with. Well, noble.
I can only speak for myself, but to me, virginity doesn't have the moral value attached to it that we think it should have. If virginity really weighs into how one values a person, one is not even seeing that person. Matter of fact, the view of other persons is depraved. I've dated several men with tons of sexual experiences in the past. They have taught me so much in life. These men are not men whores, they just have great experiences. Each and every girl they have been with shared true love and intimacy with them. Their past experiences define who they are as a person today. I think it is great.
When I hear people talking about abstinence until marriage, they often seem to make an argument along the lines of: I had premarital sex and it hurt me, I should have waited till the right person comes along. or the kind of sex I had would probably hurt other people, too; so other people (not just me) should wait to have sex until they get married.
The problem with both arguments is, it talks about all premarital sex (or abstinence) like it's the same thing. We have to realize that many ways of waiting for marriage or not waiting for marriage are harmful, but there may be good variations that you didn't do. It's also worth asking what people in the Bible meant by marriage, and what we mean when we talk about marriage matches up with it.
If two people love each other, let them have beautiful sex. It doesn't require a marriage license to share emotional and physical intimacy.
Getting married at 22 was the best choice I've ever made. I absolutely love being marred. We have been able to grow and change together (a conscious choice). Being married has opened so many doors (career, travel, opportunities) that I otherwise wouldn't have had. I'm glad I was able to do it at a young age.
It is the parents' job to raise children who have good decision making skills, the ability to analyze potential outcomes, and have long term planning skills. It is not the government's job to decide the age at which those thinking skills are there.
I know a heck of a lot of 25 year olds who would have had just as terrible of a marriage at 25 as 22.
Thank you for sharing more about your thoughts on this. It is certainly not for me and none of my business to ever judge anyone negatively, for being intimate with someone they love...if they love each other and the act of physical intimacy is consensual, it is not up to me (nor would I want it to be) to decide how consenting adults feel that they want to express their love and affection, for each other
At the same time, for my own self, and personally, I also know what I need on an emotional level, to feel happy and loved romantically, by someone very special to me. My own personal beliefs (for myself and in my own case here; please understand that I am not intending to judge anyone else negatively, at all here) is that I know and am aware, based on my own emotional needs and temperament, full physical intimacy should ideally not occur (for me) until at the earliest an official engagement, and preferably, after marriage. I need to know that I have a permanent foundation and future to build on, and with the one I love and who has my heart, before I will share that kind of most special loving intimacy, with her. I want to have a loving fiancé / wife, before we share that loving blessing together...in my humble opinion, it makes it incredibly more special and sacred and truly beautiful, that way
Well, I respect that. I don't understand it, but I respect it. =)
I think that two people have the potential to satisfy each other for life, particularly if they communicate their needs, desires, curiosities, etc. You will evolve and grow, as individuals, and as a couple, and so will your sex life-- it's forever a work in progress, not a static thing at all. Though if we neglect it, it can feel so.
Don't take this as a personal attack or insult, I really am curious about this subject. So are you that type who believe marriage is guarantee of love? You obviously want to have sex (or make love or whatever you wish to say it) till you get married. (correct me if I am wrong here)
i personally believe some people can be happy in life with a single partner. But there is no way of knowing whether a 20 year old is going to be like that. The next 10 to 15 years will be interesting for that person.
What if you discover that you like it hot and heavy and you marry somebody who likes it quiet, lights off, missionary-only? You’ll be locked-in to the relationship and totally unfulfilled!
This is a very valid objection on the surface. In many ways, attitude towards sex (waiting or not) can be a quality like “sense of humor”: everybody is slightly different and a mismatch can really eat away at a relationship if not addressed.
What if the woman you want to spend the rest of your life with is a total dead fish in the bedroom, that will be fine with you too? =)
Marriages used to last a whole lot longer when the majority of people married between age 18 and 25.
I know quite a few people who married young who stayed married, a couple I know got married at age 30 a couple years ago and they didn't last even a year.
As for divorce, there are those hopeless romantics who marry, divorce, marry, divorce, marry, divorce. Some even remarry one they divorced previously.
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