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- NO WOMEN ISSUES. No misogynists. Must enjoy loving women. Must see women as PEOPLE.
- No serious, debilitating hang-ups. Must be reasonably confident and have a positive attitude and outlook on life.
- Must be OPEN to experiencing life, trying new things. Open-minded too, but not all over the place.
- Intelligent and curious, but not obnoxious.
- NO ADDICTIONS! Can't emphasize that one enough.
- Must be capable of loving another person; in touch with his feelings but not overly mushy or needy.
- Must take care of himself physically. No smoking. Works out, but doesn't have to be "buff".
- Must be driven, pursuing something outside of himself via his career, hobbies (watching movies and playing video games doesn't count)
- Must be logical and realistic in his assessment of himself and others. No insane entitlement. Must be independent and take responsibility for improving his own life.
And, must love dogs. Just kidding.
+1. The first requirement is hands down the most basic but you'll run into a lot of those on these forums!
well- since you asked- and this truly is beyond the basics- but it has always puzzled me why more women don't look for a man with basic handyman skills. It's a total turnoff to me when a man can't do things the most rudimentary household tasks like switch out a light fixture, fix a faucet, unclog a drain, hang a ceiling fan, replace brakes or do a tuneup on a car- seriously do you realize how many TENS of THOUSANDS of dollars you would save over a lifetime if he would just take the time to learn a few basic skills rather than pay someone else every time you need a picture hung? Yes women could learn these skills too- but you did ask about men. Sometime I watch HGTV shows like Renovation Realities and these guys just look so wimpy and pathetic to me not to mention clueless. I guess I just got lucky in my relationships- or maybe this was a higher priority on my list than other women place on it.
Now see, that doesn't matter to me at all, especially in light of the fact that I can do many of these things myself. It's really low on my list. I like a man who is intellectual, kind and passionate. I don't care if he can do a tune-up on a car or not. I can always buy that kind of expertise. I can't buy love or compatibility.
And it's funny that y'all bring up complementary skills, because I was just thinking to post about that .
I want someone who has a skill I do not: navigating the medical system. This will become important as we get older, and I suck at it! I can learn, but it will help to have someone to learn from.
I also want someone who does a thing for me that I have always done for my partners (but have not always had reciprocated). I want a partner who outspokenly admires my accomplishments in life, talks about them to their friends, is impressed by them, etc. This feels selfish to ask for, but I think it's absence has, in retrospect, been a red flag. I am proud of what I have done, and I want someone who is proud of me.
well- since you asked- and this truly is beyond the basics- but it has always puzzled me why more women don't look for a man with basic handyman skills. It's a total turnoff to me when a man can't do things the most rudimentary household tasks like switch out a light fixture, fix a faucet, unclog a drain, hang a ceiling fan, replace brakes or do a tuneup on a car- seriously do you realize how many TENS of THOUSANDS of dollars you would save over a lifetime if he would just take the time to learn a few basic skills rather than pay someone else every time you need a picture hung? Yes women could learn these skills too- but you did ask about men. Sometime I watch HGTV shows like Renovation Realities and these guys just look so wimpy and pathetic to me not to mention clueless. I guess I just got lucky in my relationships- or maybe this was a higher priority on my list than other women place on it.
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Time together is more important to me. If we are both working and want to spend our time off together, I'd let my fingers do the walking thru the yellow pages and find someone to take care of a repair -- assuming we could afford to do that. I don't expect men to have a double set of skills like that. Now it can be fun trying to figure out how to fix something sometimes, but oftentimes the fun part disappears really quickly! I never want a man thinking after he has worked all week that he is coming home to a honey do list.
And it's funny that y'all bring up complementary skills, because I was just thinking to post about that .
I want someone who has a skill I do not: navigating the medical system. This will become important as we get older, and I suck at it! I can learn, but it will help to have someone to learn from.
I also want someone who does a thing for me that I have always done for my partners (but have not always had reciprocated). I want a partner who outspokenly admires my accomplishments in life, talks about them to their friends, is impressed by them, etc. This feels selfish to ask for, but I think it's absence has, in retrospect, been a red flag. I am proud of what I have done, and I want someone who is proud of me.
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