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Not sure if this is the best forum for this, but it applies to all relationships, not just dating:
Just curious how people juggle various social aspects of their life (dating, friendships, etc.), with obligations, mainly work. I work in a field where my schedule is pretty packed and I have lots of take-home projects, so time management alone is a struggle, then to add on a social life - both necessary and exhausting!..
I end up spending time with friends while stressing about my projects (I work two jobs), then working on my projects while feeling resentful that my friends are out enjoying themselves on weekends and I can't be.
Just curious if anyone has any specific tricks. I'm learning to balance my sleep schedule, which is helping, but aside from that I'd love advice on how people manage their time more efficiently while also going with the flow...
As an aside, I have a pretty abstract/visual mind... I'm an artist and naturally prefer to be spontaneous... for me micro-managing is a dirty word... structure has always been hard for me to implement. But maybe I need to change that.
I know EVERYONE has dealt with this at some point - thoughts?
Not sure if this is the best forum for this, but it applies to all relationships, not just dating:
Just curious how people juggle various social aspects of their life (dating, friendships, etc.), with obligations, mainly work. I work in a field where my schedule is pretty packed and I have lots of take-home projects, so time management alone is a struggle, then to add on a social life - both necessary and exhausting!..
I end up spending time with friends while stressing about my projects (I work two jobs), then working on my projects while feeling resentful that my friends are out enjoying themselves on weekends and I can't be.
Just curious if anyone has any specific tricks. I'm learning to balance my sleep schedule, which is helping, but aside from that I'd love advice on how people manage their time more efficiently while also going with the flow...
As an aside, I have a pretty abstract/visual mind... I'm an artist and naturally prefer to be spontaneous... for me micro-managing is a dirty word... structure has always been hard for me to implement. But maybe I need to change that.
I know EVERYONE has dealt with this at some point - thoughts?
Ha! Welcome to the club! Im in the same boat and im single with not many friends because of it. It is VERY stressful knowing your peers are doing their thing on the weekends/weeknights and I can't. Hard work pays off though(hopefully). As a side note, my few friends and a lot of my acquaintences think im rich. Im not though. I don't know how old you are but age has to do with it too. I am busting *** now so I can live a little easier in my future. I just hope I end up with a wife to share it with.
Ha! Welcome to the club! Im in the same boat and im single with not many friends because of it. It is VERY stressful knowing your peers are doing their thing on the weekends/weeknights and I can't. Hard work pays off though(hopefully). As a side note, my few friends and a lot of my acquaintences think im rich. Im not though. I don't know how old you are but age has to do with it too. I am busting *** now so I can live a little easier in my future. I just hope I end up with a wife to share it with.
Easy to stay single when busy, right? ;-\
I'm 31 - enjoying being single, going out and having fun but... I never have time for it. I tried OLD just because my weeks were too packed to socialize otherwise.
If I were in a serious established relationship, it'd be easier to spend time with a bf in between projects, etc. But going on dates is a whole 'nother beast that requires more energy it seems.
Good for you though, busting *** for your future. It will pay off for sure. I'm telling myself the same thing. In the meantime tho', we're young, we gotta live man! I do hope you go out a little bit still!
OP, why are you working two jobs? No wonder you're having trouble fitting in a social life! You are aware that most people, unless they're in school while working, only have one job, so it's easy to fit in a social life, right? So your question is aimed at a very narrow audience. Hopefully there'll be a few people here who have been in your boat, and can advise.
OP, why are you working two jobs? No wonder you're having trouble fitting in a social life! You are aware that most people, unless they're in school while working, only have one job, so it's easy to fit in a social life, right? So your question is aimed at a very narrow audience. Hopefully there'll be a few people here who have been in your boat, and can advise.
One of my 'jobs' is actually grad school/internship. So yeah, school/work. I wish I were just working or just in school, but I just don't have that luxury.
One of my 'jobs' is actually grad school/internship. So yeah, school/work. I wish I were just working or just in school, but I just don't have that luxury.
Some people on this forum have advised that you can always make a little time for social life. But people need down time, too. That's a lot to squeeze in when you're working your way through school. You're smart to put a priority on getting enough sleep! Maybe you could designate one afternoon or evening/week for socializing. Hang out with friends, or join some kind of group at school, to meet new people.
Last edited by NewbiePoster; 10-07-2014 at 10:33 PM..
One of my 'jobs' is actually grad school/internship. So yeah, school/work. I wish I were just working or just in school, but I just don't have that luxury.
hey OP, i'm curious where you stand on LTR, marriage, having kids, etc. while i definitely like your attitude and career efforts i'm just wondering if you have a different perspective than the traditional expectations of focusing on getting married, starting a family, etc. and if your gen and the economic challenges have influenced your priorities in life.
but in general i'm a believer in working smart but also maximizing your good times. you know the old saying, all work and no play makes jack(ie) a dull person... and no kidding, for me at that age had a royal blast on my free time, even in the wee hours after cranking out the work till 11pm, gave me confirmation and motivation to keep pushing maximum output. work hard/play hard mindset.
Last edited by Dr. Clean; 10-07-2014 at 11:41 PM..
Well it's easy for me since all of my male friends have either MOVED or GOT MARRIED in the past 6 years. So My life just consist of going to work, spending time with family or going on an occasional date.
hey OP, i'm curious where you stand on LTR, marriage, having kids, etc. while i definitely like your attitude and career efforts i'm just wondering if you have a different perspective than the traditional expectations of focusing on getting married, starting a family, etc. and if your gen and the economic challenges have influenced your priorities in life.
but in general i'm a believer in working smart but also maximizing your good times. you know the old saying, all work and no play makes jack(ie) a dull person... and no kidding, for me at that age had a royal blast on my free time, even in the wee hours after cranking out the work till 11pm, gave me confirmation and motivation to keep pushing maximum output. work hard/play hard mindset.
Work hard, play hard. It's definitely the only way to really do it, and really the only good advice. Just sucks sometimes, ha.
As for LTR, marriage, having kids... I was in a long-term relationship that I ended a couple years ago. I wouldn't say that I am hyper focused on a career any more than on I am on having a family at some point - I just discovered my passion a little later than others and am putting myself through school so I can make it a career. But yeah, I would like a family at some point, which is why I insist on actively dating while being in school and working/interning. I would like to settle down with someone and hopefully meet him in the next few years. That is my goal for sure.
That being said I am not really traditional/conventional by any means. I do think my generation is a bit different - settling down in our late twenties/early thirties is more common than our early twenties, at least in the cities I've lived in. Most of my friends haven't wanted kids until their late twenties/thirties, either. A lot of us have traveled/moved around a lot in our twenties.
Work hard, play hard. It's definitely the only way to really do it, and really the only good advice. Just sucks sometimes, ha.
Quote:
Originally Posted by lillyz
Just curious if anyone has any specific tricks. I'm learning to balance my sleep schedule, which is helping, but aside from that I'd love advice on how people manage their time more efficiently while also going with the flow...
okay, fair enough, thanks for responding to my question. and it seems i overlooked one of your questions.
well, i honestly think that a couple of the "tricks" to finding balance includes changing your mindset and also adapting your environment to integrate your "home" and business/productivity space to become more seemless. like for many years it was easier to stay at the office late when i had a gym nearby, a mini fridge, an office couch to sleep on, a tv to watch on background, etc. and nearby bars and restaurants i'd frequent where i became friends with the bartenders and servers. helps to tip well too. anyway, at least that was my mon-thu life but i'd work on saturdays in the office or a few hours too. like i said, home/work space became seemless.
as far as changing mindset, what i am referring to is almost the same, which means you are always "on" business wise and you just seek to create your work/personal life as a "whole" you. tough to do, but if looking into becoming more zen like and your career objectives are compatible with your personal values it can be done. also, i've noticed there are more and more blogs writers focusing on quality of live measures as a form of business/career "fringe benefit". tom farris' 4hr work week is a good example. but it's essentially creating a lifestyle that is more "whole" as opposed to compartmentalizing your work and personal life. actually, i've recently been doing again quite a bit of this over the past several months.
then oddly enough we should be discussing this but last night i ran across an effective meditation program called the silva method that been around for decades that helps you reprogram yourself for this kind of mindset. i'm a sucker for self improvement so i'm going to sign up for a live weekend seminar nearby in a couple of weeks. and if you haven't tried tony robbins, NLP, brian tracey, mindfulness, self hypnosis and prayer, you owe to yourself to look into those at least out of intellectual curiosity. but at the core of all of this stuff is developing the ability to transform yourself for your next life challenge, along with discovering your life purposes and aligning your daily activities to move toward that end. also, be aware that there is a truism that says that whatever skills, talents and opportunities it took to get you here may not necessarily be the same to get you to your next point in life.
good luck
Last edited by Dr. Clean; 10-08-2014 at 01:39 AM..
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