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Oh, wrongturn, you are making so much sense it hurts!
Yes! I completely get it!
As I said in my previous post, it was mostly ego but I did have some real feelings for him and started to realize at the end what a great catch he was! But now he's taken! Yes, I will let it go and breathe as you advised.
Also, I'd like to share one more thing: part of the reason I held off is because he is so handsome, intelligent, talented...and beloved by all the women. A big flirt too, so a part of me was scared I would get played out!
Aaaarrrrggggghhhhh.....I just want this to go away.
Frustrating, I know. You're going to be okay. One more questions for you to think about is are you sure you felt like that when you met him and leading up to before you liked him? In other words, your mind isn't just playing tricks on you now that he is gone, right? If not, next time someone has feelings for you like this and you're in a situation that is similar with a man who is sought after like you described... You could give in somewhat, but keep your guard fully intact until you're sure he is a good guy, he actually likes you, and you're not going to be hurt by him.
Frustrating, I know. You're going to be okay. One more questions for you to think about is are you sure you felt like that when you met him and leading up to before you liked him? In other words, your mind isn't just playing tricks on you now that he is gone, right? If not, next time someone has feelings for you like this and you're in a situation that is similar with a man who is sought after like you described... You could give in somewhat, but keep your guard fully intact until you're sure he is a good guy, he actually likes you, and you're not going to be hurt by him.
Thank you for the encouraging words, wrongturn. I really needed that.
Good question. Well, no, I didn't like him at first but then began to develop feelings for him within the last couple of months. The more I learned of him, the more I liked. It took a loooong time to get to this place and maybe as you say my mind is playing some tricks.
Yes, the next time I will be more open so that I can at least give myself the opportunity to learn more about the guy. Only makes sense because at this point I think I'm going off of a lot of what could have been.
Thank you for the encouraging words, wrongturn. I really needed that.
Good question. Well, no, I didn't like him at first but then began to develop feelings for him within the last couple of months. The more I learned of him, the more I liked. It took a loooong time to get to this place and maybe as you say my mind is playing some tricks.
Yes, the next time I will be more open so that I can at least give myself the opportunity to learn more about the guy. Only makes sense because at this point I think I'm going off of a lot of what could have been.
Exactly, you may be fantasizing your ideal relationship which obviously didn't exist with him in your eyes. I've done it before, many people have.
Another thing to think about is that some guys love the chase. There are actually guy friends I have that love the chase so so much, as soon as they get what they want, they're no longer satisfied or interested. I've noticed this in them and pointed it out before. Maybe he was so into you because he couldn't have you and he liked the game he was playing with himself. And now the reverse may be occurring for you. Jeez the human race is crazy when you think about it hahaha. But it's all normal for the way our minds work.
But like I said before you get too caught up in all this, remember the fundamentals of what occurred. You weren't initially interested and kept pushing away for whatever your reasons may have been. Now that it's gone, you're missing it. I mean I even miss "basic training" sometimes and that's really weird because it was so terrible. Nostalgia.
Exactly, you may be fantasizing your ideal relationship which obviously didn't exist with him in your eyes. I've done it before, many people have.
Another thing to think about is that some guys love the chase. There are actually guy friends I have that love the chase so so much, as soon as they get what they want, they're no longer satisfied or interested. I've noticed this in them and pointed it out before. Maybe he was so into you because he couldn't have you and he liked the game he was playing with himself. And now the reverse may be occurring for you. Jeez the human race is crazy when you think about it hahaha. But it's all normal for the way our minds work.
But like I said before you get too caught up in all this, remember the fundamentals of what occurred. You weren't initially interested and kept pushing away for whatever your reasons may have been. Now that it's gone, you're missing it. I mean I even miss "basic training" sometimes and that's really weird because it was so terrible. Nostalgia.
wrongturn, you're an angel.
Yea, I often think about that. If I had given him the chance, how soon would the disinterest set in. I know most times the antidote to that is building a solid base. A friendship.
Honestly, this guy could get ANY (or at least most) woman he wants. I think he may have been more intrigued with me than most girls because I went against the grain. The first girl he couldn't impress. And it was real. I wasn't pretending. He was not my type and was nowhere near my radar.
I remember the first day he realized I really wasn't interested and the look of shock and disgust he gave me, lol. Like how dare I not think he was the be all and end all. Wild.
About two months ago, he stopped hanging out in a particular circle that I am also a part of. Just upped and left.
As you say, guys like that are tricky. He is used to getting what he wants. Fast. I don't work like that.
Ah well, I will survive. Just waiting for these feelings to pass.
Yea, I often think about that. If I had given him the chance, how soon would the disinterest set in. I know most times the antidote to that is building a solid base. A friendship.
Honestly, this guy could get ANY (or at least most) woman he wants. I think he may have been more intrigued with me than most girls because I went against the grain. The first girl he couldn't impress. And it was real. I wasn't pretending. He was not my type and was nowhere near my radar.
I remember the first day he realized I really wasn't interested and the look of shock and disgust he gave me, lol. Like how dare I not think he was the be all and end all. Wild.
About two months ago, he stopped hanging out in a particular circle that I am also a part of. Just upped and left.
As you say, guys like that are tricky. He is used to getting what he wants. Fast. I don't work like that.
Ah well, I will survive. Just waiting for these feelings to pass.
There ya go. Now re read what you just wrote whenever these feelings come again! You're headed in the right direction.
In any event, I feel a lot better about it. I chuckle about it, actually. Chuckle about how the tables turned so unexpectedly. I pray that he is doing well and that he is happy.
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