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Old 09-22-2015, 11:33 AM
 
403 posts, read 597,988 times
Reputation: 378

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You need to be more assertive and stand up for yourself. Next time tell him "NO." Say no. I know it can be hard especially if you like the guy, but you need to say "No, I don't want to yet. I'm not comfortable." Look him in the eyes when you say it. Be stern, don't smile and don't be flirtatious. Sometimes guys don't get the hit, it's a game to them. You need to make it very clear that you don't consent. If he pressures you after that saying something like "Oh c'mon baby, please, do it for me, I'll make you comfortable blah blah blah" he's BSing you and you need to say it again. "I already told you no. I'm not comfortable with that, okay?" After that, he really should get the hint. I think he would respect you a lot more too. The guys aren't protecting you or looking out for your feelings. They do NOT have your best interested in mind. He's obviously a huge douche and he used you for sex, typical for guys. It happens, don't worry about it. It happened to me too. Hopefully now you know better. Every girl deserves a respectful guy...he's clearly not one.
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Old 09-22-2015, 02:14 PM
 
12,585 posts, read 16,955,404 times
Reputation: 15256
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kellyanne29 View Post
I know I deserve so much better than this whole sorry situation
Wish I could claw some self respect back
He will always see me as a sad pathetic woman
You are!

Who in there right mind would let a guy force you to have sex with him when you are on your period???

He is an a$$!

Delete every contact for him and move on!!!

Sheesh!!!
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Old 09-22-2015, 02:40 PM
 
6,806 posts, read 4,908,708 times
Reputation: 8595
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kellyanne29 View Post
Same guy.
I'm trying to break things down and work out if it was me who did something wrong
He raped you.
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Old 09-22-2015, 05:20 PM
 
Location: SF Bay Area
13,520 posts, read 22,134,708 times
Reputation: 20235
OP's situation was discussed ad nauseum here: Does he have feelings for me? He has a girlfriend...I'm confused
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Old 09-22-2015, 05:52 PM
 
3,218 posts, read 2,811,300 times
Reputation: 3459
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kellyanne29 View Post
He has a gf and young baby so maybe that is why he backed off.
Yea ummm...maybe...
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Old 09-24-2015, 07:41 AM
 
11,558 posts, read 12,055,996 times
Reputation: 17758
The OP isn't getting it; as I posted earlier, people in an abusive situation who continue to be the victim are living in another world. We can give advice or warn her of the dangers but it's not sinking in; not until she reaches her limit. She had admitted she 'doesn't know why she's that way', and all of our words are simply bouncing off the wall.

Until she accepts reality that she has to focus on herself, instead of on him, and until she seeks counseling and actively works to gain self-respect, self-esteem, and self-confidence, she will continue on the same path she's on right now.
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