Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
 
Old 01-08-2017, 07:01 PM
 
24,559 posts, read 18,286,736 times
Reputation: 40260

Advertisements

My dad had vascular dementia. By age 80, he was pretty impaired. He had retired to Florida and my stepmother was looking after him. In his early 80's, my sister and I used to fly down for a week at a time to spell my stepmother. He eventually ended up in a memory care facility when it became impossible to have him at home. For me, the emotionally traumatic day was when I visited him at the memory care unit and he no longer knew who I was. He died about 9 months later. I was a bit melancholy about it but to me, he had already died 9 months earlier.

I'm fortunate that I had a good lifetime relationship with my father. I visited frequently on summer weekends my whole adult life. When he was in his early-70's before the dementia had kicked in, I took 18 months off work and spent several months with him playing golf and doing his other retiree things.

My mom is 84 and in assisted living with Alzheimer's symptoms. Her short term memory is only good for about 10 to 15 seconds these days. I manage all her affairs. She's just fine living in the present other than lamenting "well, here I am.... stuck here." I've been through this once. At some point a some months or years from now, she's likely to no longer recognize me. That will be the bad day for me. She had a great life and high quality of life into her 80's.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 01-08-2017, 07:13 PM
 
Location: So Cal
52,292 posts, read 52,734,263 times
Reputation: 52795
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffD View Post
My dad had vascular dementia. By age 80, he was pretty impaired. He had retired to Florida and my stepmother was looking after him. In his early 80's, my sister and I used to fly down for a week at a time to spell my stepmother. He eventually ended up in a memory care facility when it became impossible to have him at home. For me, the emotionally traumatic day was when I visited him at the memory care unit and he no longer knew who I was. He died about 9 months later. I was a bit melancholy about it but to me, he had already died 9 months earlier.

I'm fortunate that I had a good lifetime relationship with my father. I visited frequently on summer weekends my whole adult life. When he was in his early-70's before the dementia had kicked in, I took 18 months off work and spent several months with him playing golf and doing his other retiree things.

My mom is 84 and in assisted living with Alzheimer's symptoms. Her short term memory is only good for about 10 to 15 seconds these days. I manage all her affairs. She's just fine living in the present other than lamenting "well, here I am.... stuck here." I've been through this once. At some point a some months or years from now, she's likely to no longer recognize me. That will be the bad day for me. She had a great life and high quality of life into her 80's.
Man... what a story. Glad to hear that you're parents in general had a good run. I hear Alzheimer's is really rough. Sorry you're mother is going through it. It will be a hard day when the time comes that she no longer recognizes you. I don't know you, but I feel the dread myself, it's easier to relate to others when you've gone through similar things. Granted my parents didn't have the same medical condition, but like was posted earlier that dread and sense of fear of when it does happen, that is rough.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-08-2017, 07:23 PM
 
Location: DFW
40,953 posts, read 49,221,262 times
Reputation: 55008
Thoughts and prayers be with you Chow. I lost mine about 20 years ago at an early age.

You'll miss him but you'll have those great memories always.

Rick
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-08-2017, 08:01 PM
 
Location: So Cal
52,292 posts, read 52,734,263 times
Reputation: 52795
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rakin View Post
Thoughts and prayers be with you Chow. I lost mine about 20 years ago at an early age.

You'll miss him but you'll have those great memories always.

Rick
Thanks.

I was reluctant to post about it here. In real life I'm a pretty private person and don't share much, but here on CD I tend to open up a bit more, maybe because of a certain level of anonymity I don't know really.

Like the old cliche' goes time tends to make things feel a bit easier and I'll be at my fighting best soon. I've been in this zombie like state for a few days now and I suppose that is probably normal.

I'm surprised by the all of the positive messages and well wishes from a lot of people here. It's been a bit humbling truth be told. I've been getting DM's and reps with an outpouring of positive energy.

I will most certainly do my best in the future to pass on positive well wishes to others going through rough times. I've learned a little bit more about life from all of this and to all of those in my corner I won't forget the well wishes. I'm a loyal guy, you do right by me and I will do my best to reciprocate.

Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-09-2017, 08:14 PM
 
4,005 posts, read 4,108,969 times
Reputation: 7043
Picked up groceries after work tonight. The guy in front of me had 4 packages of donuts and a 12 pack of beer. LMAO. The breakfast of champions.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-09-2017, 09:30 PM
 
Location: Pa
42,763 posts, read 52,886,422 times
Reputation: 25362
Hugs to you Chow.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-10-2017, 07:36 AM
 
24,559 posts, read 18,286,736 times
Reputation: 40260
Quote:
Originally Posted by metamorphosis View Post
Picked up groceries after work tonight. The guy in front of me had 4 packages of donuts and a 12 pack of beer. LMAO. The breakfast of champions.
My favorite is right before a snow storm or tropical storm, the whole world is in the grocery store buying milk, eggs, and bread. What are they doing? Having a French Toast party?

I ran out of half & half this morning. Coffee using powdered skim milk is pretty lousy. I tried to salvage it with a splash of Kahlua and some sugar but it still tastes pretty off.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-10-2017, 07:44 AM
 
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,995,252 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffD View Post
My favorite is right before a snow storm or tropical storm, the whole world is in the grocery store buying milk, eggs, and bread. What are they doing? Having a French Toast party?

I ran out of half & half this morning. Coffee using powdered skim milk is pretty lousy. I tried to salvage it with a splash of Kahlua and some sugar but it still tastes pretty off.
I keep a can of sweetened condensed milk on the shelf as an emergency item.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-10-2017, 08:39 AM
 
24,559 posts, read 18,286,736 times
Reputation: 40260
Quote:
Originally Posted by timberline742 View Post
I keep a can of sweetened condensed milk on the shelf as an emergency item.
I used up four little cans of evaporated milk last spring and never got around to replacing them. All I had on hand was a box of powdered milk packets. First world problems.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-10-2017, 11:25 AM
 
4,005 posts, read 4,108,969 times
Reputation: 7043
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffD View Post
I used up four little cans of evaporated milk last spring and never got around to replacing them. All I had on hand was a box of powdered milk packets. First world problems.
The powdered stuff really IS nasty. I'll pass on coffee if powder is my only choice.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 10:57 AM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top