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I guess because they want to know upfront what they are dealing with (possible kid emergencies leading to canceled dates, them having to play second fiddle to your kid, not being able to be very spontaneous due to child care arrangements, etc.). Also men assume kids = drama or they think you are done having kids. I am single with a kid,but he has a very involved father who gets him over 50% of the time. I date and go out on my "off" time, so I don't get why it's such a huge deal.
I guess because they want to know upfront what they are dealing with (possible kid emergencies leading to canceled dates, them having to play second fiddle to your kid, not being able to be very spontaneous due to child care arrangements, etc.). Also men assume kids = drama or they think you are done having kids. I am single with a kid,but he has a very involved father who gets him over 50% of the time. I date and go out on my "off" time, so I don't get why it's such a huge deal.
I think you about nailed it. It goes both ways, you get men that have their kids a good amount of time so it works both ways.
I also feel like there's a double standard re: kids. I think women have less issue with a man having kids than men have with women having kids. Since I've become a mom, I have been noticing the DILFs I love seeing men playing with and caring for their kids but I don't feel that moms are seen the same way.
I also feel like there's a double standard re: kids. I think women have less issue with a man having kids than men have with women having kids. Since I've become a mom, I have been noticing the DILFs I love seeing men playing with and caring for their kids but I don't feel that moms are seen the same way.
Very broadly speaking and using the most generalizations I can, hopefully to avoid finger pointing and hurt feelings.... it's sorta normal for women to be "motherly", it's slightly less normal to see men being "motherly" or tender or whatever we want to label it.
Hopefully enough disclaimers were provided.
Last edited by Chowhound; 10-14-2016 at 06:12 PM..
If we are talking about dating here (I can't imagine randomly asking someone if they have kids unless it was apart of the general tone in the small talk) it's pretty clear why someone would want to know of kids where in the picture.
They want to Know what they are entering in to and potientially sharing a future on.
I don't date single moms, even if the father and her get along and everything is fine.
I don't want kids and I really don't enjoy interacting with them.
I like to travel, a lot.
I made it to my thirties without kids, there's a reason.
There's plenty of awesome single women without kids.
That said, I did try dating a woman I really liked that had 2 kids. The father had them 3 days a week and he was actually a solid dude. He was remarried and they got along fine. I still couldn't get past it, I guess I'm" not a real man" or whatever they like to say!
The woman I dated was understanding and we're still friends, but it won't go past that.
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