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I'm talking information like your last name, where you work, Facebook (if one has one), introduce to family/friends, etc.
Let's say you begin dating a total stranger that you met online.
I have a friend who dated someone that he met on a dating site. He broke it off and she started calling him at work and harassing him. She even called his boss!
Another friend went out with someone for awhile. He broke up with her because she wouldn't give him any space. She became friends with his brother's wife and she made him look like the bad guy as if he is at fault for the relationship ending. She also bashed him on facebook. They only dated a few months.
I think it's okay to tell them your last name on the first date, I don't see why you wouldn't. And you can tell them what you do, but you don't specifically have to tell them where you're work.
I'd wait until you're exclusive or close to exclusive before you start introducing to family and friends.
I'm talking information like your last name, where you work, Facebook (if one has one), introduce to family/friends, etc.
Let's say you begin dating a total stranger that you met online.
I have a friend who dated someone that he met on a dating site. He broke it off and she started calling him at work and harassing him. She even called his boss!
Another friend went out with someone for awhile. He broke up with her because she wouldn't give him any space. She became friends with his brother's wife and she made him look like the bad guy as if he is at fault for the relationship ending. She also bashed him on facebook. They only dated a few months.
What's your rule on this?
I wouldn't meet a stranger without knowing their last name. I would find it weird if somebody wanted to meet me, but didn't want to tell me their name.
I would also find it weird if I was on a date with somebody, and employment came up conversationally, and the person was secretive about where they work/what they do.
Other things, play by ear based on how well you connect with the person, how intimate you want to be, what you're comfortable with. No rule of thumb.
Date one. And I don't have rules, I go with the flow.
(Though not introducing them to family on date one).
This.
I'm an open book, and haven't had any dudes use the information I disclosed against me. None of that. My husband is about as transparent as they come. I still tease him about his username on OKCupid, which was his first and last name. His response: "I don't have anything to hide. I don't care if people look me up. Go ahead."
And I did, and I sent him a FB request the day we started talking.
I wouldn't meet a stranger without knowing their last name. I would find it weird if somebody wanted to meet me, but didn't want to tell me their name.
First name I can see but last name? Why is that important if you are meeting in a public place full of people? Someone can give you a fake name so you can't really verify it unless you're asking a a copy of a driver's license or something like that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa
I would also find it weird if I was on a date with somebody, and employment came up conversationally, and the person was secretive about where they work/what they do.
First name I can see but last name? Why is that important if you are meeting in a public place full of people? Someone can give you a fake name so you can't really verify it unless you're asking a a copy of a driver's license or something like that.
Why is that?
Why would you NOT share that info with someone you're interested in potentially socializing with on a more than passerby level?
People who aren't comfortable sharing their identity or basic life details aren't people I consider to be particularly well-suited to even a dating level of intimacy. If you're that guarded, socializing with others is only gonna go so far. Because people finding out your name and the work you do is pretty standard.
If you're that guarded, dating may not be for you. The whole point of dating is to get to know people.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tgm4256
Why is that?
Seriously? People go out to meet people to get to know them. That includes sharing stuff about you, job, family, passions, where you've lived, etc etc. This is a pretty critical part of getting to know someone. You know, talking to people you just met.
Why would you NOT share that info with someone you're interested in potentially socializing with on a more than passerby level?
On a first date when you barely know the person? Not everyone is nice or friendly or what they appear to be when you first meet. Some people are pretty vindictive and don't take rejection too well.
On a first date when you barely know the person? Not everyone is nice or friendly or what they appear to be when you first meet. Some people are pretty vindictive and don't take rejection too well.
Yet, I'm supposed to be comfortable even meeting a person so paranoid that they are not giving out names? Nah.
Geez, I get a first and last name from people I meet for a job interview. I'd expect no less of a date, which is essentially an interview.
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