She can't take a hint-HELP (professional, like, approach, alone)
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I met someone recently who I thought was normal at first but now find out she is a reject. Little by little she confided in me things like she was adopted by a dysfunctional family that didn't treat her well and she talks about this ALL the time and blames her problems on it. Seemed like everyday she would tell me private things like she wet the bed until age 12, grinds her teeth at night and takes paxil. She always has some type of ache or pain that she needs to inform me of. She can't even answer the phone or door without being afraid! She told me she wants to go to nursing school (I told her to rethink it since she has so many emotional problems-I know I wouldn't want a psycho nurse caring for me or my family). I tried to give her advice but she is happy being unhappy and everywhere I look she is there (we work the same shift). She won't stop bothering me and I tried to let her know that I'm not interested in listening to her problems anymore but she still keeps on whining to me! I need specific ideas and things to say so she will understand without her thinking I'm really really rude. I'm afraid if I am too rude that she will complain to supervisor about me. Please help so I can work without her bothering me all the time!
Tell her you want to have sex with her.
When she starts on her story about this and that, "I want to have sex with you."
"Well anyways, when I was younger I...." (interrupted) "I want to have sex with you."
You are lucky buddy!!! I am being trained by a spoiled blue eyed, blonde haired, girl who thinks the sun does not shine until she wakes up...!!! She cries full crocodile tears every single day if anyone says anything remotely distancing to her....instead of working all we end up talking about is her over perfect life and how she needs way too much attention. She thinks she is Mrs. America and she is just a basic looking girl like everyone else who is spoiled like a toddler and very annoying. When I tried to shake her loose she sits in her seat and pouts, walks all over building complainging that I rejected her, and is now making my training a living hell!!! I have no choice but to put up with her, but as soon as I can transfer I AM OUT OF THERE!!!! It will be about 11 months of long painful childish behavior I will have to put up with.
Be careful. If she is really bothering you get to a supervisor before she does and don't make eye contact with her or start any conversation at all.
I agree to docu it and tell the supervisor. But also handle it yourself. Just tell her that she should not be talking to you about these things as it is not appropriate for work. Also tell her that she needs to talk to a therapist or personal friend, not a co-worker.
I had to deal with someone like that in social situations and they got vindicitive towards me after I told them I could not listen. I was not rude but they got bratty. That is why I say notify the super. You never know how people are going to react.
"I'm sorry those things have happened to you. We all experience pain, but suffering is optional. If your childhood is affecting your adult life I think speaking to someone who is qualified to listen and help is a good idea. I'm not qualified to help you. I wish you well on your path"
And if that doesn't work, just draw her aside, tell her about your problems, and make absolutely sure that your problems---actual or alleged, but lay them on thick---make hers resemble winning Deal or No Deal.
And if that doesn't work, you could always take a page from Miss Manners, Judith Martin, who once had to contend with an obnoxious fellow school board member insisting she join them on a weekend retreat to "get to know each other better": You don't understand. The only reason I haven't murdered you yet is that I really don't know you all that well and I want to give you the benefit of the doubt. Do you want to remove that doubt?
Well this thread is a few months old and I suspect the OP already handled the situation. I'll give my advice anyway in case someone else still needs it. If I was the OP I would simply tell this poor woman that "she and I are not compatible to be friends, and I would prefer if we had no further contact". I'm sure anyone can understand this statement no matter how obtuse.
When she starts on her story about this and that, "I want to have sex with you."
"Well anyways, when I was younger I...." (interrupted) "I want to have sex with you."
That should work.
Yeah that should work at getting you into a sexual harassment law suit and loosing your job.
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