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I do - to a point. I'm not hooking or anything, lol. But why spend months dancing all around someone and never once say, "Hi!" Seems strange, and makes me think the guy has 'issues'.
If a man wants to catch a fish, he can't be afraid to go in a store and ask for bait, can he? Would he just stand around outside the bait shop and wait for a worm to willingly jump on his hook??
I guess I'm just too old-fashioned, but as a woman, I'm not doing the 'pulling'. At a bare minimum, if someone wants to sample my milkshake, he's going to have be brave enough to come into MY yard, and not just dance around outside the fence.
I guess I'm just too old-fashioned, but as a woman, I'm not doing the 'pulling'. At a bare minimum, if someone wants to sample my milkshake, he's going to have be brave enough to come into MY yard, and not just dance around outside the fence.
It's 2017; men's requirements increased, just as women's did earlier. Today, your milkshake has to have enough intriguing qualities to bring the boys to the yard in the first place. You can't be, like, "it's better than yours" by the sole virtue of it being your milkshake. Even if you're thinking: "Damn right, it's better than yours." But if you can teach them, it's fine that you have to charge.
It's 2017. Your milkshake has to have enough intriguing qualities to bring the boys to the yard in the first place. You can't be, like, "it's better than yours", by the sole virtue of it being your milkshake. Even if you're thinking: "Damn right, it's better than yours." But if you can teach them, it's fine that you have to charge.
LOL!
Nope, as Annie Lennox once sang, "I need a man!"
...and my milkshake might not be better than yours, but then, why keep wasting time strutting around my fence?
I think there is too much confusion maybe? Marching to your own drum is fine, but at least *I* need some fundamental guidelines. Heck, even a silly pigeon knows he needs to coo at a perspective mate, and not just strut around her incessantly.
If someone thinks being the pursuer is a tough role to handle, try being the submitter for a day or two, lol.
It wasn't a problem for me when I was with a gay friend at a gay club. Some felt a bit aggressive but I figure it's just me being out of my element. No pressure to be persued because I was there to hang with friends rather than find someone to take it further.... Not interested in men.... Apparently the crowd I was in found Asian guys to be highly desirable.
I could have just hung out and a few guys would hit on me.. I would simply say I was with someone.... And hope they took the hint which some didn't.. Ugh. Annoying.
My friend I was with... Young built educated petite clean cut Asian guy is somewhat passive in dating. He never seemed to have trouble finding people interested. Although he often chose the wrong types to date...
Sit back and let happen .. happen.... Not an option in a dating scene which you are expected to initiate. I would say it's still best to learn to take rejection and persue whomever catches interest.. I say this as a man but I would give the same advice to any female. My female friends tend to be the type that have to learn to take rejection after being forward... So it's no big deal to them.
Its also from being around female friends that I realize being rejected by a female isn't such a big deal anyways.... It gets easier with practice
It wasn't a problem for me when I was with a gay friend at a gay club. Some felt a bit aggressive but I figure it's just me being out of my element. No pressure to be persued because I was there to hang with friends rather than find someone to take it further.... Not interested in men.... Apparently the crowd I was in found Asian guys to be highly desirable.
I could have just hung out and a few guys would hit on me.. I would simply say I was with someone.... And hope they took the hint which some didn't.. Ugh. Annoying.
My friend I was with... Young built educated petite clean cut Asian guy is somewhat passive in dating. He never seemed to have trouble finding people interested. Although he often chose the wrong types to date...
Sit back and let happen .. happen.... Not an option in a dating scene which you are expected to initiate. I would say it's still best to learn to take rejection and persue whomever catches interest.. I say this as a man but I would give the same advice to any female. My female friends tend to be the type that have to learn to take rejection after being forward... So it's no big deal to them
Okay, but the person who submits takes a harder fall in the long run. In a casual dating climate, I would agree with you.
Maybe that's the issue for me. When I think of love, I'm not thinking of it in a casual manner, but more in a friendship, love AND loyalty context. I don't necessarily mean marriage, but something that will leave me feeling safe and nurtured. Honestly, to get my attention, you have to have something I can learn from you (rhetorical you and not you personally). That's just the way I am, I seek knowledge.
In a hetero-sexual context, I know my role as a woman, and I know the role I expect from a man. I can be the rock he leans on. I can serve him and service him. I can silently stand behind and make him appear larger than life outwardly. And, I will never feel more betrayed and/or made a fool of than when I find out he's just been playing me. You know, hell hath no fury...and all that.
I don't think rejection is so important in true adult relationships. If I'm still in high school, and my social circle is so closely contained, then I can easily understand the worry about rejection.
In the end, whether gay or straight, I agree with you. You never know until you try. The only difference being, I'm not going to try until the man at least greets me.
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