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It's nothing to be bitter about because there are men out there who will date/marry divorced women with kids.
This is the point and you made it perfectly. Just because some don't like single moms doesn't mean other men won't date them. Just focus on the ones who will and not the ones who turn them down.
Welp, here’s our newest “I signed up to post about how much of a plague and burden women are” poster, which this forum seems to attract an awful lot of.
And there shouldn’t be stay at home Moms? So if my wife and I decide that since I make more money out of the two of us, I should work and she should stay home and take care of the child, when we eventually have them, that’s not okay? She should also be working and we should maybe put our child in day care? And use up a significant amount of the money that she’d be making, on child care, rather than stay home and take care of the child and not work, should that be what we agree on?
I don't know why women get so bitter about men who don't want to deal with single moms. Society acts like all women have to be accepted no matter how much baggage they bring or how sloppy their bodies are.
l wouldn't call it bitterness, although maybe it is a bit of disgust on my part from first hand experience. So maybe I am personalizing things too much.
When I was dating and looking for someone, I found that most (not all, but most) of these much older guys wanting to date younger women to start families were damaged goods. Quite a few lied about their age and used old photos. They all claimed to be "young for their age" but they weren't. And while dating them, in discussion, I figured out they were often the same "playboy type" of guy who back in high school and college wouldn't give me the time of day unless it was to mean to people like me. It was an impression that they couldn't empathize that I was a human being. They say me as a means to an end (start a family).
Like I said, they always had baggage in spades that they thought I should accept: liars, health issues, empathy issues, etc. As you said, why should I have to accept their baggage? And census statistic show most women think like me, with 95% choosing to marry close to their own age.
And in all fairness, again, it wasn't all men over 40. It just happened to be the majority that wanted to date me. I do know older men, never married, who are not the type I just described. But they seem to date closer to their own age. And I did run into one man who was over 40 and not the type I described above. But he was still very marriage and children focused.
I found much better luck with men focusing on men closer to my age who had been married and were divorced (most people my age are or have been married). I found my boyfriend that way. He is a bit older than what I considered my oldest range (I was looking for +/-5 years and he's 8 years older). But we both decided to give things a chance. And he got married young and has two kids already and was just looking for companionship with a like minded and like hearted soul, which is also all I really wanted to. No wife and mother shopping "get married goal."
This is the point and you made it perfectly. Just because some don't like single moms doesn't mean other men won't date them. Just focus on the ones who will and not the ones who turn them down.
If only you said that and not, like, what you actually said.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,995,252 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wanderlust76
No one was talking about a 20 year difference. The statement was "woman in her 20's with a man in his 40's. That could mean a 28 year old with a guy that just hit 40.
That is incredibly rare are as well. Never saw it that I can recall. The thing is, with business people, and political people, etc that are very well off, their spouses and professional socializing: dinners, parties, charity events, etc are very much part of their professional lives as well. Almost always at these things you see people that are close in age, and they have been together for quite some time (and helped each other get where they are) or met each other in their careers and professional socializing. They marry peers.
Quote:
Originally Posted by thisis60
Are you playing dumb or are you really like this? Anyone who watches TV or read articles on liberal websites (I'm not a republican) has surely noticed this pathetic campaign that calls anything "shaming" or "misogynistic" if a man voices his preferences for some standard that not all females can reach. I just read the first two pages on this topic and the defensiveness is hilarious. A lot of them are clearly bitter about men who don't want to inherit baggage.
I've never seen this either.
Quote:
Originally Posted by thisis60
And never in my life have I seen a man "rage" at female for not giving up her number. The vast majority of females that I've seen bring this up tend to be very unattractive, and I doubt that they actually get asked out.
Having lots of female friends, I do see this a lot. They show me texts and messages they get from guys after turning them down. Some serious jaw dropping rage and anger coming from a lot of guys. I'd be terrified to be a woman.
And you just added some of it yourself, by implying because you don't find someone physically attractive that you're dismissing their experiences. Women of all ages, colors, sizes etc get verbally abused, **** shamed, demeaned, even assaulted etc by men.
Having lots of female friends, I do see this a lot. They show me texts and messages they get from guys after turning them down. Some serious jaw dropping rage and anger coming from a lot of guys. I'd be terrified to be a woman. .
I saw rage from one guy after simply not responding to his email within 24 hours. Told me I had a "bad attitude" for not responding to him.
I saw rage from one guy after simply not responding to his email within 24 hours. Told me I had a "bad attitude" for not responding to him.
I've experienced rage from women I chose not to continue dating - and even from some I decided not to meet at all. I've been called all kinds of nasty things for deciding they weren't as amazing as they saw themselves to be. All for saying I didn't see us as compatible. Ah well, I guess I avoided bigger problems.
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