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Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Reputation: 40635
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mightyqueen801
I don't know that poster's reason, but I know two young women who are allergic to latex and were in pain from the condom irritating their tissues before they figured it out.
I've run into this. There are non latex condoms (I don't mean lambskin ones) out there. Trickier to find and they don't feel great compared to the better latex ones, but its good for dudes to keep a few around just in case.
Exactly. My dating money is just my entertainment money. I'm spending it on something. Last night it was a couple of drinks with someone, if not that, it would have been movie tickets, or entry to a show. Life costs money.
That's how I feel too, and I'm a pampered princess with gentleman callers lined up at my door. 👰
Seriously, if I couldn't afford dinner out, on top of all of my other bills, I'd stay home. I wouldn't be able to enjoy being out.
I don't have Netflix, can't afford nothing extra right now so it will have to be "Comcast on Demand Chill"
You just need to spend wisely, my Comcast bill was getting closer to $200 every year, with the worst customer service in the history of customer service, while Netflix and Hulu combined are still under $20! You can Netflix, chill, Chinese take out, and the GOOD beer for what you were paying for cable
Quote:
Originally Posted by JerZ
OMG, every girl's dream date..will you at least be a gentleman and open the bag of Doritos first? Or is it already open from last weekend?
Love the visual: "Why you puttin those Doritos away already, my hand was still in the bag....you got someone coming over LaTEr?!"
How many times do I have to go through this ?! Ability to afford isn’t the issue, it is the damned principle that is the problem.
Do you feel this put out about buying a round, a birthday gift, or picking up a check with your friends? Is this a dating issue for you, or is this that you don't like to be generous to anyone?
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,748,461 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle
Do you feel this put out about buying a round, a birthday gift, or picking up a check with your friends? Is this a dating issue for you, or is this that you don't like to be generous to anyone?
Not even the same thing. Those situations I’m giving crap to people I know and trust. A date I don’t know who the hell she is or if she is even worth my time and money. Difference.
Not even the same thing. Those situations I’m giving crap to people I know and trust. A date I don’t know who the hell she is or if she is even worth my time and money. Difference.
How many times do YOU have to be told?
Asking someone to go with you, and paying their way IS the principal.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,974,024 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by RbccL
How many times do YOU have to be told?
Asking someone to go with you, and paying their way IS the principal.
Yup. It's also weird to me to go out with someone if I don't know it is worth my time. If I made the decision to ask them out, I decided it was worth my time and money. If I don't think they are, I wouldn't ask them out.
How many times do I have to go through this ?! Ability to afford isn’t the issue, it is the damned principle that is the problem.
I listened to a Ted talk once, sadly can't recall the name of the man who was giving it... But he was coming from a place of being generally desirable, good looking and well off, and saying that as a man who respects himself, if his date does not at least OFFER to pay her own way in the early getting-to-know-each-other stages, he will drop her fast. He explained it really well. It's a matter of not wanting to feel taken advantage of. He may opt to pay for her if he wants to, but it should feel like a choice made freely, not an expectation or an imposition.
I completely agreed. I think that early on when you do not know each other that well, having some kind of an expectation that another person is obligated to put out money, sex, or anything, is just...well, it feels disrespectful. It is definitely a matter of principle.
That said, I think that if one person asks another person out, it's considerate to think about the cost of the date, too. Like if I would not ordinarily go to Chez Fancy and spend $100 on dinner (which I wouldn't) but some guy specifically asked me to go there...I'm going to mention that I really cannot afford that. It's not a matter of poverty, it's a matter of priorities. I have many other things I'd rather do with $100 than buy one meal or one evening's entertainment, that is just where I'm at. If he wants badly enough to go there, he can pay. If not...I'm really just as happy with Ihop or something. Breakfast all day? Count me in! Or coffee, ice cream, a free museum or a walk.
That's just a matter of aligning one's principles and priorities. It doesn't make one right or wrong, but it signals compatibility or lack thereof.
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?! 
Ability to afford isn’t the issue, it is the damned principle that is the problem.
